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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25209751">Space Oddity</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/spindleweeds/pseuds/spindleweeds'>spindleweeds</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Eventual Relationships, Eventual Sex, F/M, Female Friendship, M/M, Modern Girl in Thedas, Science Fiction, Self-Esteem Issues, slight AU</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 11:07:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>59,663</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25209751</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/spindleweeds/pseuds/spindleweeds</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Annie had always wanted to be memorable, unique, extraordinary, and every other synonym for special. What she hadn’t counted on was being the first known human to witness, fall into, and survive a wormhole. </p><p>As Annie simultaneously learns how to adapt to a distinctly medieval way of living and the existence of interdimensional travel, she faces ugly truths about who she really is and what she truly wants; when nobody knows what Cambridge University is, or what shoegaze is, or what flares are, or what TikTok is, what really is left of Annie's personality?   </p><p>Annie’s goal remains the same: kill the Archdemon, get sent back home, get new Air Forces, and get her degree. The consequences of her appearance, however, extend far beyond the Blight and even Thedas itself.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alistair/Female Warden (Dragon Age), Alistair/Original Female Character(s), Alistair/Original Grey Warden Character(s) (Dragon Age), Zevran Arainai/Male Cousland, Zevran Arainai/Male Warden</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>81</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. PROLOGUE</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>SPACE ODDITY: PROLOGUE</p><p>Annie O’Connell had always thought that her relationship with the Universe was sometimes toxic. It had always behaved oddly with her. Some days it rewarded her with good exam results, a new Tinder match, or an invite to a party. She imagined that her elation at these things could be compared to receiving a bouquet of roses from a lover. Other days, it would give her average results, ugly photos uploaded by her friends to Instagram, and a distinct lack of attention from her fellow humans. On those days, she would lie awake at night asking herself what she had done wrong. But when it returned with those roses, luring her back into society with affirmations of her intelligence, looks and uniqueness, she forgave it. Just the other week she had filmed a TikTok of her makeup routine which garnered thousands of views and comments that flattered her style and beauty. Rejuvenated, she had forgiven the Universe for allowing her to be ghosted by a boy just two weeks earlier.</p><p>Today, however, her relationship with the Universe nose-dived. It had decided to punish Annie in the worst way imaginable. At eleven in the morning, Annie had woken up, eaten breakfast, and spent two hours readying herself for meeting her friends. It had taken forty minutes to choose an outfit and an hour to do her makeup. She had studied her wardrobe to best suit the conditions of the day: overcast, breezy but not cold, roughly seventeen degrees Celsius. She was meeting friends in Camden, London, presumably to haunt the endless record shops and second-hand clothes stalls. She had to be comfortable for the walking, warm against the wind, and stylish for the location. Of course, she couldn’t look like she was trying <em>too</em> hard.</p><p>At half past one, she had met her friends at the Tube station. Phoebe, Caitlin and Blessing were all prettier than her with their smaller noses, fuller lips and stronger jawlines, but Annie knew she surpassed them all in style. At parties everybody gushed over her clothes (mostly thrifted, meticulously put together, and unique), and at pre-drinks everybody listened to her playlists (carefully arranged to create a vibe, with just the right amount of people-pleasers and obscure tracks to emphasise her interesting music taste). The group of friends had then gone to a nearby Japanese restaurant to have some lunch (vegan, of course). 
At three o’clock, Annie and her friends had scoured the racks and found some pieces to buy. In a small record shop Annie had leapt had the opportunity to recommend some albums to her friends. Though Annie hadn’t bought anything herself, she had felt good when her friends bought her recommendations. Nobody in their friendship group could come close to her knowledge and taste.</p><p>The Universe seemed to be kind that day, Annie thought, as they meandered through busy streets against an ever-stronger breeze. But when the clocks struck four o’clock, the Universe changed its mind. A new hour beckoned for trouble. The friends wandered around an old antiques shop and Annie breathed in the musty air deeply. She tried on retro sunglasses and took pictures with Blessing as Phoebe and Caitlin took pictures in the array of mirrors hanging on the exposed brick wall. Blessing snapped a picture of Annie and laughed. “You look like Keanu Reeves from the Matrix in this one,” said Blessing. Annie peered down at the phone screen and pulled a face. Her face looked round and undefined, made worse by the hint of a double chin.</p><p>“I look horrible,” she said, disgust pulling at her lips. “God knows if I was Bella Hadid I would be pulling them off.”</p><p>Blessing laughed again and deleted the picture without asking. “Maybe these ones would be better,” she suggested, passing a tiny pair of angled rose-tinted glasses to Annie. Annie reluctantly put them on and pulled them to the edge of her nose. “Hot,” Blessing said with a smirk. Annie rolled her eyes. She gazed into one of the ornate, oil-streaked mirrors that hung on the wall. The glasses sort-of matched with her painted low-rise pale blue jeans, dirty Air-Force Ones, white halterneck and oversized red denim jacket. Unfortunately, her belt buckle, earrings, nose ring, necklaces and rings were silver. The rims of the glasses were gold. Nevertheless, Annie held onto the glasses as she trailed after the others in the shop, envisioning outfits she could pair them with. Would white cropped jeans, a red ruched top and silver jewellery work? Annie shook her head: too basic. Lost in thought, she bumped into a table and winced at the pain that flared in her hip. Ahead of her, Phoebe pulled a dusty piece of heavy velvet off a table and gasped at whatever had lain beneath it. “Oh my God, a crystal ball!” she called to the others. Annie wiped the dust off her jeans and joined her friend at the table.</p><p>“I went through a witch phase once. Thought if I did spellcraft and blood magic I could be interesting enough to seduce men,” Annie drawled. Phoebe giggled.</p><p>“Like a femme fatale type?” her friend asked, and Annie smiled.</p><p>“What else?”</p><p>Phoebe ran her finger down the glass, leaving behind a faint trail of oil as she did. “I’ve heard these can burn your house down if you leave them uncovered,” she said. Annie nodded.</p><p>“That would be very unlucky. I imagine dropping it on your toes would also be very unlucky.” Annie added, making Phoebe laugh again. Annie was very pleased that she could make Phoebe laugh so easily. Annie cleared her throat and continued: “They’re also very, very expensive, so we better not break it.” Phoebe sighed and nodded. The crystal ball was probably worth thousands of pounds, meaning it was far out of a student’s budget.</p><p>“I wonder how people read them,” Phoebe sighed, “I wish I had an interesting hobby like witchcraft.”</p><p>“For some people I guess it’s not,” Annie said with a shrug. Phoebe hummed in agreement then draped the velvet back over the ball. Annie caught sight of another mirror in the corner of the shop; it was huge, rectangular, and worn away with age. Silver vines crept up the edge of the mirror, twisting like snakes. It was spotted black, obviously needing a desperate fix-up, and rested on two large metal claws. Annie wandered over to inspect her appearance. Her concealer had started to crease in her smile lines and she gently blended it with her fingers. 
A tinkling of a bell and crash made Annie jump. She whipped around to glance at the shop’s entrance just as a man barrelled through the door. He was dressed all in black and seemed to be panting. Annie took in his appearance, and, deciding he was nothing special, turned back to fix her makeup and hair in the mirror. She heard the man walk around the shop and approach the worker behind the cash register.</p><p>“Ooh, it’s about time somebody picked this beauty up!” the worker exclaimed, “Will that be cash or card?”</p><p>“Cash,” the man replied gruffly. Annie hummed to herself as she wiped away some smudged eyeliner. By the time she turned to face her friends, the man was gone and the worker was putting away huge stacks of twenty-pound notes. Caitlin whistled lowly.</p><p>“That guy must’ve been loaded.” The worker gleefully shuffled the notes.</p><p>“What did he buy?” Annie asked without looking at Caitlin.</p><p>“The crystal ball,” Caitlin replied, “hopefully he doesn’t burn his house down.”</p><p>“Maybe he’s a witch. Or a wizard.” Phoebe said with a smile.</p><p>“Whatever he is, let’s hope he doesn’t drop it on someone’s foot on the Tube,” Annie added, “are we done here?” Her friends nodded and they began to walk to the exit. Annie went up to the desk to pay for the glasses. As she stood and waited for her Apple Pay to be processed, her eyes wandered over a bunch of necklaces that were hanging from the low ceiling like stalactites. Amongst the long, thick gold chains and dainty silver threads, her eyes caught on a pink crystal suspended from the ceiling with gold. “How much is that one?” she asked, pointing to the necklace.</p><p>“Twenty,” the worker replied, but then looked down at the glasses on the desk and smiled. “But I’ll do it for fifteen since it matches so well with these.”</p><p>“I’ll take it.” Annie got out her phone again to pay. A frivolous purchase, perhaps, considering she was meant to be saving every single penny for her post-exams gap year, but she really did not have any jewellery that perfectly matched the glasses.</p><p>After paying for both items, Annie rejoined her friends outside. The musty air of the shop morphed into the polluted, breezy air of the London streets. “Johnathon told me that there’s a super cool graffiti wall around here,” said Blessing, popping a stick of gum into her mouth. “Maybe we could take some pics there?” The friends agreed and followed Blessing along the busy streets.</p><p>As they walked, they passed a woman with incredible cheekbones and a fantastical long, leather trench coat. Annie frowned; if she had tried on those Keanu Reeves glasses, <em>she</em> would’ve looked incredible. Annie thought about investing in a faux leather trench coat. 
As they approached the graffiti wall, her friends squealed and pushed phones into Annie’s empty hands. “Please take some photos of us, Annie!” Caitlin pleaded. “We’ll take turns!” Annie smiled but felt crestfallen inside. Obviously, the Universe felt that she was better suited as a photographer rather than a subject. Annie slowly walked backwards until the angle was better. She watched as her friends posed together, laughing and smiling whilst she was stuck pressing buttons. Clouds were starting to darken the street and Annie knew that when it came to her turn the lighting would be worse.</p><p>Sounds of feet hitting concrete drew Annie’s attention away from the phone screen. Down the street, people were parting like the Red Sea to let a man run as fast as his legs could carry him. The public looked at him quizzically, then shrugged, carrying on with their day. Until another man, in hot pursuit, demanded their same attention. Annie frowned in confusion. <em>Who actually runs in public? </em></p><p>“You’re going to ruin our-” she heard Phoebe start as the first man neared them, threatening to come between the camera and the three girls, before there was a loud, ringing bang and the man lurched forwards to fall on the concrete. Somebody started screaming. Annie couldn’t focus on anything. The man was lying on the floor, moving, but only just, and she heard people start to run. <em>What had happened?</em></p><p>Then blood started pooling around him. Realisation crashed over Annie like a wave and her mouth went dry. Somebody was yelling her name. She was holding Phoebe’s phone but suddenly forgot how to call for help. The man rolled over, a deep red staining his black t-shirt, and she looked up to see members of the public tackling the gunman to the ground, who was screaming for them to stop. Shards of dark glass littered the ground and textured the pool of blood. The man’s fingers were clutching at a dark, broken glass ball. From the shop, Annie realised. The blood had begun to pool around her shoes. Her friends were still screaming her name, screaming at her to move away, to get out of there, but they were too scared to cross the road to get to her. The three friends clutched at each other and left their photographer to her fate.</p><p>“Fuck,” the man wheezed, blood dripping from the corners of his mouth. Annie opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by the distant sound of sirens. As policemen arrived to push back the public gathered in the narrow side street, and as an ambulance came screeching around the corner, the injured man began screaming: “Get out of here! Get out of here now!” Nobody seemed to listen. The police and paramedics began to approach. Annie was still frozen to the bloodstained ground, unable to move, to speak, to think-</p><p>“I have a bomb!” he yelled hoarsely, and everybody stopped in their tracks. Sirens wailed loudly.</p><p>“He… has a bomb!” the attacker yelled in agreement.</p><p>Annie looked at the man, feeling nauseous as a saliva bubble tinged red formed and popped in his mouth. His mouth and brow were contorted in agony. He looked at her, strangely, then said: “I’m so sorry.” Before Annie could process the information- was he going to detonate? - she realised that a black cloud was emanating from the broken crystal ball. No, not a cloud, a … tear? It grew more quickly than she could run away from. She could hear someone screaming as the polluted, breezy air suddenly vanished and she felt faint and everything felt light and distant and stretched. Annie only just realised that it was her who was screaming when the bloody concrete disappeared and a roaring black nothingness stretched beneath her. 
She lost consciousness soon after that.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. the swamp</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Annie opened her eyes, it was almost as if she hadn’t opened them at all. All she could see was blackness. Maybe that guy had really detonated that bomb and killed her, and this was death. This was what everybody feared. Blackness. Darkness. Nothingness. She could move her arm, slowly, she realised, and when she looked down her body was there- denim, skin and cotton. Maybe she wasn’t dead. Or maybe she was, and this was her ghost outfit. At least she had taken the time to choose nice clothes.</p>
<p>Walking proved more difficult, since there was no ground. Perhaps this was zero-gravity. Despite the lack of sensory stimulation, something felt distinctly cool in her pocket. Annie’s hand closed around the pink crystal necklace. Suddenly, pinks and reds exploded in her vision and she snapped her eyes shut and screamed in pain. Pink, red, pink, red, <em>gold</em>- like those stupid glasses. Everything shifted around her, as if the very atoms themselves were peeling back from her skin then she was gasping for breath as oxygen suddenly refilled her lungs. When had she been holding her breath?</p>
<p>Annie squeezed her eyes shut even harder. Whiter light tried to creep into her vision, held back by her eyelids. She could feel a slight warmth on her face. A small breeze caressed her face and ruffled her baby hairs. When her ears were no longer popped, faint birdsong drifted across space. A shadow moved over her, blocking out the faint warmth and light, maybe a cloud. When mumbled words cut through her ears like a knife she realised it was probably a person. She couldn’t understand them, whether because of her disorientation or whether they were a different language she couldn’t tell.</p>
<p>When cold hands touched her face a scream caught in her throat and her eyes snapped open. Light blinded her for a moment, and she groaned at the ache behind her eyeballs. Whoever had touched her began speaking gibberish again. Maybe she had hit her head really hard. Somebody eased her into a sitting position and the faint smell of body odour curled around her nostrils- whoever it was, they needed a new deodorant. The grass beneath her fingertips was damp with mildew. <em>Wait, grass?</em></p>
<p>Annie finally opened her eyes. The scene before her looked as if it were a dream. An old woman knelt before her, wrinkled with ruddy cheeks and stringy grey hair, but her eyes were a bright gold. Startled, Annie flinched backwards. The old woman laughed, showing yellowed teeth, before speaking in a strange language which almost sounded German. Behind the old woman, gnarled trees formed a dark canopy which only let sunlight through the very tops of the leaves.</p>
<p>The distinct smell of mud permeated the air and Annie saw that they were next to a swamp dotted with rushes and lilypads. In the middle of the swamp, a man’s mangled corpse floated on the algae. Dressed in black and staining the muddy water with blood, Annie realised it was the man from earlier. The old woman shook her shoulders and Annie realised she had been speaking to her.</p>
<p>“I… I don’t speak your language,” Annie said quietly, tears brimming in her eyes, “Where am I?” Although Annie was rather good at reading faces, the look that flashed across the old woman’s face was impossible to decipher.</p>
<p>“Hmm,” the woman said. Clouds moved overhead, blocking out the feeble sunrays, and Annie felt a shiver run through her body. Definitely real. How had she ended up in the countryside when she had been in London? The old woman stood up with creaky bones and looked over Annie’s head, speaking in a loud voice. Although tears were blurring her vision, Annie turned her stiff neck to look behind her. A pale woman in tattered cargo trousers and a purple scarf cradled the broken crystal ball, which dripped murky, deep red water onto the grass. Annie sniffled.</p>
<p>When the two women continued to converse, anxiety bubbled in Annie’s chest and she fell onto her back, trying to control her breathing as her hands shook. One of the women scoffed and Annie felt her cheeks burn. Not her fault that she had woken up in a strange place with strange people. Or was she dreaming? A horrible screeching sound ripped across the swamp and Annie’s eyes flew open as her train of thought ran away from her. Across the water, a person with horrible mottled skin dressed in brown armour beat their chest and hooted again. She could smell the decay on their body from a considerable distance. Feeling sick, Annie ducked her head between her legs. Another crazy person to ignore.</p>
<p>An arm snaked underneath her armpit and suddenly hauled her skyward, sending her vision spinning and her vegan sushi up her oesophagus. The younger woman with the same striking golden eyes hissed something at her and Annie looked at her blankly. The woman rolled her eyes and yanked Annie behind her, making Annie’s shoulder ache painfully. More people of various heights and widths crowded behind the crazy person, who stuck out their long tongue that curled at the end. They had sharp teeth. Very sharp teeth. They lurched forward and started to sprint round the sides of the lake. Annie screamed and fell to her knees.</p>
<p>The leader was suddenly encased in ice and a fireball exploded across the swamp, the sudden heat making Annie’s cheeks feel dry and itchy. In front of her, the young woman pointed a long wooden branch at the crazy people and brilliant white lightning shot out, bouncing from one maniac to another. When the people screamed, it was as if their voice boxes didn’t exist- it was like listening to foxes shrieking in the night. Hot tears ran down Annie’s cheeks and she vaguely thought about how her eyeliner would be a mess.</p>
<p>Although when she peered through the gaps in her fingers and saw that three psychopaths had fallen to the floor, dead, another four continued to press on, despite the frostbite and burns which ate away at their ugly faces. As they got closer, Annie saw that they didn’t look human at all. For someone who couldn’t even brush their teeth without scrolling through social media, Annie was suddenly overwhelmed with stimulation. The smell of blood, mud and rot, the sounds of howling, screeching, clanging, the heat of fire and the coldness of ice, the taste of vomit-</p>
<p>The young woman shouted as one of the- <em>things</em>- avoided a glowing mark on the floor and hurtled towards Annie. When it opened its mouth to laugh, black ichor dripped off its pointed teeth and ran down its ruined jaw. She could smell its awful breath. Annie clutched at the crystal in her hand and screamed again. Pink, red and gold exploded across her vision and she felt light once more, feeling atoms strip away from her skin and all stimuli except light disappeared for a brief moment. A distant shout rang out, distorted as if she were underwater, as the alien thing ran through her while she phased out of existence. Although she could only perceive her surroundings as dark shapes, she saw its form crumple to the floor as it unexpectedly met air instead of her flesh. As it fell, the old woman stabbed through its back with the pointy, bladed end of her staff.</p>
<p>When Annie fainted again, her hand let go of the crystal and it fell in a multitude of colours before resting on physical ground once more. Light shifted from warm-toned to cool-toned before her vision went black again.</p><hr/>
<p>She felt hungover when she woke up. Her head pounded in time with her heartbeat and Annie groaned. A voice she recognised as the younger woman’s drifted through her ears. So, she hadn’t reappeared in London, Annie thought sadly. At least a pillow had replaced mud and grass, albeit it was coarse and itchy. When she cracked an eye open, she saw that her eyeliner and mascara had smudged on the cream material. She was offered a wooden cup of water and she drank eagerly from it, despite the earthy taste. Annie felt tired. Her eyes were swollen from crying.</p>
<p>The young woman, who she now saw closely, had fine, delicate features overpowered by golden cat-like eyes. Very pretty. Very scary, as well. The woman didn’t smile but she didn’t scowl either. It seemed as though she had acknowledged their language barrier and recognised their impasse as well. She watched Annie silently as Annie looked at her surroundings. She was in a small wooden hut, sparsely decorated with wooden furniture. It was hardly bigger than her bedroom at home.</p>
<p>The door clanged open and the old woman strode inside, grinning. Annie watched cautiously, feeling very much like a mouse caught between two cats, as the old woman cleared her throat and mumbled strange words to herself. Annie raised an eyebrow and looked quizzically at the young woman, who offered no explanation in return: her face remained passive and aloof. When the old woman was finished, she smiled at Annie, whose gaze returned to her face, and she laughed. “Is that better?” she asked, and Annie jumped.</p>
<p>“So you do speak English?” Annie returned, feeling slightly bristled.</p>
<p>“I do not. I have cast a spell so that we may understand one another. I have never heard your language.” The old woman replied. Annie’s face fell in confusion.</p>
<p>“A spell?” she asked in disbelief. The younger woman scoffed.</p>
<p>“You did see the ice and fire spells, did you not?” she asked coldly. Annie’s shoulders slumped and she rubbed at her eyes. She had seen the creatures fall to the floor on fire, singed by lightning, and attacked by frostbite, though Annie thought she had hallucinated it. Magic, as far as she knew, did not exist.</p>
<p>“So that was all real?” Annie asked, pressing for more information, “All of this is real?”</p>
<p>“Of course, child,” the old woman said with a smile. Something sinister glinted in her golden eyes. “You gave us quite a fright when you and your friend appeared out of thin air the way you did. Ha ha ha!”</p>
<p>“My friend…?” Annie said quietly. Ah. The dead man. “Where am I?”</p>
<p>The old woman stood up from her chair and paced the hut, gathering clothes. “The Korcari Wilds, girl. The darkspawn horde is almost upon us.”</p>
<p>Annie’s brain started to hurt. Perhaps she should’ve thought that this was a joke, maybe a TV show or YouTube thing that pranked people into thinking that they had been transported to another dimension. Perhaps she was actually in a coma, dreaming everything. Perhaps she was trapped in some sort of psychosis. Magic did not exist. Those… things, did not exist.</p>
<p>But when she remembered how that man had oozed blood, the black smoke that had drifted from the crystal ball, the sheer nothingness she had felt afterwards, and the overwhelming feeling of shifting between places, it was real enough for her. She didn’t know what was worse- the fact that this had happened to her, or the fact that she believed it all. Annie O’Connell, an offer-holder for Cambridge University, well and truly believed that she had been sucked into a wormhole. Annie laughed. She felt strange. Homesick, even.</p>
<p>The old woman grinned again and set the shattered black crystal orb onto a nearby table. “It seems as if the combination of this orb, your crystal and your natural affinity allowed you to survive your journey. And shift between planes.” The old woman pondered.</p>
<p>“This is… insane,” Annie muttered. “Are you sure I’m not in psychosis?”</p>
<p>“This is real, girl. And the sooner you accept it, the better,” the old woman laughed. The sunlight that penetrated the wooden walls of the hut glinted off the black orb. It seemed duller than it had been in the shop.</p>
<p>“So… is there any way for me to get back? Since I have the crystal?” Annie asked nervously. “I’m sure it’s nice here and all, but… I have things to do back home.” She had planned to go out clubbing with her friends the following evening, lunch with another friend the following day, booking plane tickets to Peru the next…</p>
<p>The old woman laughed again. She was a bit of a maniac. “Perhaps, but without the energy provided by the orb, I’m afraid you’ll have to wait. Though the crystal provides you with a useful and entertaining party trick,” she cackled. The sound was starting to grate on Annie’s ears.</p>
<p>“I…” Annie started, but she didn’t know where the sentence was going. It was all too much for her. Tears stung at her eyes again.</p>
<p>“Mother,” the younger woman said sharply, as if in warning. The old woman shrugged.</p>
<p>“Even as an old, old woman, I am still learning things. A stranger from a distant land, transported to our reality and able to phase between planes of existence without any help from the Fade…” the old woman trailed off, deep in thought. She considered Annie with those predatory eyes, making Annie recoil, before directing a burst of light at her. Annie blinked in surprise, and the woman made a noise of interest. “No connection to the Fade at all…” she said.</p>
<p>“The what?”</p>
<p>“Perhaps we should leave our guest to rest, mother,” the young woman said with gritted teeth, “I am sure she must be tired. ‘Tis not every day one is flung into the Korcari Wilds.”</p>
<p>The old woman nodded. “Morrigan is right, girl. We shall let you rest before we explain everything to you. I assume you desire answers as well as peace. We will wake you when supper is ready.” The old woman smoothed down Annie’s hair. “What is your name, child?”</p>
<p>“Annie.” She replied quietly. A tear was already rolling down her cheek. The old woman wiped it away with the wrinkled pad of her thumb.</p>
<p>“You have quite the journey ahead of you, child. I hope wherever you come from, they make them strong,” the old woman murmured. “I am who they call Flemeth.”</p>
<p>And with that, Morrigan and Flemeth left the hut, closing the door behind them. The room became darker and smaller. Annie turned onto her side, squeezing her eyes shut, then cried until she had no more tears left.</p><hr/>
<p>The sun was setting outside when Annie felt strong enough to leave the hut. The inner corners of her eyes hurt and her skin was dry from crying. There were no mirrors in the hut, so she inspected her appearance in her powder compact in the low sunlight. Her skin was red and blotchy, the concealer worn away from her blemishes. Grey streaked her cheeks where her makeup had run. She drew in a deep, shaky breath and cleaned her face with a makeup wipe from her bag.</p>
<p>Her rucksack had somehow survived the journey and she inspected the inside; there were crumpled receipts, tissues, a water bottle, small makeup bag, tampons, spare pair of underwear, a jumper she had bought in Camden, an umbrella, her purse, her phone, portable charger, AirPods and earphones. She had packed for a long afternoon and evening in the city, anyway.</p>
<p>Unlocking her phone, she quickly saw that she had no service nor access to mobile data. Another sign that this was real; phones had never appeared in her dreams before. Annie realised that she still had Phoebe and Caitlin’s phones in her denim jacket pockets. She gave a watery laugh, wondering if they were more devastated by the loss of their phones or their friend. She wondered if they were alive. She wondered if Earth had imploded from the force of the wormhole. If that were the case, would more people have been transported? Or would she have been the only one if the crystal had protected her?</p>
<p>Annie laughed again. She dabbed a small amount of moisturiser on her face to ease the dryness. She studied herself in the mirror: large eyes, crooked nose, lips that were neither full nor thin, redness in her cheeks, dark circles, and patches of acne on her cheeks. Not a beauty like Morrigan. She felt naked. These people had no idea what was desirable in London. They had no idea that behind Annie’s unremarkable features she had made something remarkable for herself. Here she was… nothing special.</p>
<p>A shiver rolled down Annie’s spine and she shook her head to rid herself of those thoughts. Dealing with the grief of losing everything in the space of one day was emotionally draining enough without the self-inflicted attacks on her self-esteem. Taking another deep breath and shrugging on her denim jacket, Annie left the hut.</p>
<p>Flemeth and Morrigan were sitting round a small fire, a metal pot balanced on a wooden frame. Something brown was simmering inside. Flemeth looked up and smiled. The night was dark, and cold, and she heard distant howls of wolves. “Is it safe out here?” Annie asked, her voice hoarse from hours spent sobbing. Flemeth laughed.</p>
<p>“Even if my magic failed and the darkspawn horde descended on this hut right now, I’d wager you would escape by not moving at all.” Flemeth replied. Annie frowned, then remembered the crystal. Ah.</p>
<p>“Supper is ready,” Morrigan said in a flat voice. She spooned stew into bowls.</p>
<p>“Um, what meat is this?” Annie asked, eyeing the food. Morrigan raised an eyebrow.</p>
<p>“Rabbit.”</p>
<p>“Oh,” Annie replied. She hesitated, not wanting to inconvenience her… rescuers.</p>
<p>“Spit it out, child.” Flemeth huffed.</p>
<p>“I haven’t eaten meat in four years. It might make me really sick,” Annie explained quietly, “through no fault of your own, of course. It’s the way my body is.”</p>
<p>Morrigan remained unreadable. Annie couldn’t tell if she was annoyed or not. “Just eat what you can, girl,” said Flemeth. Morrigan spooned out the majority of the meat, leaving behind a thick broth. She tore off more bread for Annie as well. Annie smiled at her, though she did not smile back. They ate in silence, Annie focusing intently on her meal and the sounds of the Wilds around them. Toads croaked from the water, the breeze rustled leaves, and wolves howled in the distance. A stark change to the suburban symphony back home. Foxes, pigeons and the screeching of cars were certainly less pleasant to listen to, but at least they were familiar. Comforting, almost, except maybe the foxes.</p>
<p>“Did you know that man in the water?” Morrigan asked, cutting through the awkward silence. Annie shook her head.</p>
<p>“No. He had bought the crystal ball from a shop I was in, then ran in front of me and fell when he got shot. It broke the ball and I guess that’s how I… we, got here.” Annie explained. It felt strange talking about him. She had never seen someone die before. She wondered who he was.</p>
<p>“Shot?” Morrigan asked, “A crossbow bolt?”</p>
<p>“No…” Annie replied, wincing. She had no idea how to explain a gun, not quite knowing how they functioned to begin with. “Another weapon. Smaller, with a projectile launched at great force. Same concept to a crossbow. I don’t know why he was shot by someone in the street in public. That hardly happens where I come from.”</p>
<p>“Pah!” Flemeth sneered. “Men are the same everywhere.”</p>
<p>Annie snorted into her stew. She slurped some more from her spoon. It was salty and earthy, and she wished she hadn’t thrown up the sushi from earlier while she was crying. “I want to pretend that I’m hallucinating everything, trapped in a psych ward. But this is all real, isn’t it?” She asked. The fire crackled and Morrigan nodded. Annie heaved a sigh and continued: “You seem… knowledgeable. And, uh, magical, I guess? Is everybody magical here? And how does magic work? We can’t make ice and fire appear out of thin air… as far as I know.”</p>
<p>“Such curiosity. No, not all of us are mages. Magic is dependent on a connection to the Fade. The Fade is a realm where such power comes from. Mages have a… natural affinity with it. The Veil separates this world from the Fade, otherwise demons and spirits would have free realm across the lands, and only mages can somewhat cross that barrier in this physical world. When we dream, the Veil is weaker, and mages and non-mages alike wander the Fade spiritually. Of course, it is much more dangerous for a mage, who can be tempted into consorting with demons.” Flemeth explained. Her golden eyes reflected the firelight like a cat’s.</p>
<p>“That is a very… sanitized version, mother.” Morrigan drawled. Flemeth only laughed in her face.</p>
<p>“Tis only so she understands,” Flemeth shrugged her shoulders.</p>
<p>“Do you think this Fade has anything to do with… me?” Annie asked the witch.</p>
<p>“Perhaps, perhaps not. If there is no Fade in your homeland, then it would be unlikely, but not impossible. The Fade is not understood by most. I do not possess the answers you seek. Ah, I will have to think more on the matter…” Flemeth trailed off before continuing: “Your presence here is very interesting indeed. I would suspect that the orb merely provided the energy for the portal to open. The crystal and a natural affinity for shifting between realities are the true instruments. Perhaps an opportunity will present itself for such energy to be created, perhaps not.” The witch cackled with laughter.</p>
<p>Annie eyed her warily. The old woman’s repetitive words were rather irritating and the witch seemed to enjoy beating around the bush. “So to go back home, we need to find an energy source?”</p>
<p>“We! We!” Flemeth laughed again. “An interesting proposition. I shall not find it for you. But you shall not find it alone,” the witch said cryptically.</p>
<p>Annie felt her chest drop and she wanted to cry again. “My parents will be so worried,” Annie whispered. She twiddled the ring they had given her for her sixteenth birthday round her finger.</p>
<p>“There is no use dwelling on your grief now. Accept it, hold it, then let it go, girl,” Flemeth said lowly, “tis a path that has been walked by many and will be walked by even more. Tis for the best.” The witch stood up, gathering her skirts, then disappeared into the forest with not so much as a goodnight.</p>
<p>“Where’s she going?” Annie asked Morrigan.</p>
<p>“To think. Or to bewitch a man into her bed, have her way with him, then devour him afterwards,” Morrigan replied, her voice tinged with disinterest. She filled the empty stew pot with ice before the fire leapt in huge flames. Startled, Annie leaned backwards, watching as the younger witch scoured the pot.</p>
<p>“Thank you. For the stew and… stuff,” Annie said sheepishly. Morrigan looked at her, considering her with those piercing eyes, before nodding in acknowledgement. The witch took the empty bowl from her hands to clean it.</p>
<p>“You are welcome. Though, your stomach will have to be stronger for the days ahead, in more ways than one.” Morrigan told her. Annie bowed her head, watching as the fire burned to embers. Morrigan looked at her then sighed. “If you plan on weeping throughout the night, I shall spend the night in the forest. I do not desire unbroken rest.” The witch said coldly.</p>
<p>Annie’s cheeks burned in indignation and she felt her temper rise. “I’ll try not to, but I can’t make any promises. I have just been transported to another world, lost my entire life and identity, and have no idea if my planet survived,” Annie countered. She tried to stay pleasant as not to rile Morrigan but nevertheless stood her ground. She hated when people were condescending, as if they did not know her intelligence and strength.</p>
<p>Morrigan raised a thin, dark eyebrow, a ghost of a smile hinting at her lips. “My, my. I shall keep that in mind,” she said, before handing the pot and bowls to Annie. They were dented but lighter than what Annie had assumed. “Put these in the cupboard below the shelves. I shall return in the morning.”</p>
<p>“But what if those… darkspawn appear again?” Annie asked. At least, that’s what she assumed the darkspawn that Flemeth and Morrigan kept mentioning were. She wasn’t sure she could cope with those things breaking down the hut’s door in the middle of the night. Maybe she would just let them kill her and this nightmare would be over.</p>
<p>“I shall not go far. Magic protects this hut from unsavoury characters, though of course the horde would overwhelm our quaint abode if they had the brains to find it. Though if that were to happen, there would be no use resisting,” Morrigan replied evenly. “I bid you goodnight. You may bolt the inside of the door if you wish.”</p>
<p>Annie watched as the witch sauntered down the dark path by the lake, then her body contorted strangely, contrasting with her measured, confident strides before falling onto her arms and… changing. Though Annie could only make out vague shapes in the darkness beyond the hut’s clearing, she could have sworn that a wolf-like creature prowled into the night. Annie shook her head. “Shit,” she muttered. She was too tired to question anything now. She hoped that if she went to sleep, she would wake up in a hospital bed.</p>
<p>Annie retreated into the wooden hut, bolting the rusty lock as she did, then placed the pots in the cupboard below shelves of herbs. She changed out of her clothes then put on an itchy tunic she had found in a chest. When she draped her jacket over the rustic wooden chair, she suddenly remembered the phones in its pockets. She checked their batteries and winced. Thirty-nine percent for Phoebe, fifty-two for Caitlin and sixty-three for herself. She turned them all off and sniggered to herself when she idly thought that it would probably do the batteries a world of good.</p>
<p>Slipping beneath the coarse blankets, Annie rolled onto her side and hugged the pillow between her arms. As she lay there, listening to the hoots of owls, howls of wolves, and the rustle of leaves, she knew that sleep would not come easy. Thoughts of her family and friends whirred in her head and soon her temples started aching. When she hoped for their survival, the guilt of worrying them overwhelmed her until she heaved with shallow breaths. When she thought on their possible deaths, the grief of losing them forever reduced her to sobs once more.</p>
<p>There was nothing she could do to steady her heart and ease her mind. It was also extremely hard to sleep when your pillow was soaked, Annie realised. And your skin hurt like a bitch from dehydration. Exhausted, Annie eventually fell asleep, dreaming of turning into a wolf and chasing her parents through the Wilds, before ripping out the throat of the guy that had ghosted her two weeks earlier.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. the routine</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sleep had been fitful, and Annie awoke feeling just as tired as the day before. The sight of the wooden walls and horrible blankets upon her stirring sent Annie into another grief and confusion induced daze. She stared at the ceiling for a while, blinking back tears, before sitting up. Without her phone she had no idea what time it was. Yellow light streamed through cracks in the wood and the lone window, though the hut was still rather dark.</p><p>Annie wondered if Morrigan and Flemeth had already returned. She didn’t know what to think of the witches; they were cryptic, and obviously didn’t have the best relationship. They were also undoubtedly intimidating and powerful, but for the time being they had seemed to take on the responsibility of protecting her. Annie wondered why witches who threw fireballs at darkspawn and murdered men after sleeping with them would do such a thing. Maybe they just hated men. Annie could understand that.</p><p>Annie thanked her past self for throwing in a spare pair of underwear in her rucksack for period emergencies. She mentally made a note to wash her dirty pair later. She had never washed anything by hand before, and she wondered if they had soap. Did they use lye here? Urine? Her painted jeans were dirtied on the knees and seat, but with some scrubbing the mud would come out.</p><p>Annie kept the tunic on and rummaged in the room’s chests for something to wear on her legs, coming across a pair of threadbare trousers which appeared to be leggings worn with age. Annie pulled them on and rolled up the bottoms before putting on a pair of disintegrating socks, her new vintage jumper and her trainers. If she stained her new purchase, she would probably have a nervous meltdown.</p><p>There was no water to wash her face with, apart from the half-full water bottle in her bag. Annie decided that after breakfast she would clean everything, lest her acne worsen. Now that would be the end of the world. A familiar cackle sounded outside. Flemeth was back, apparently.</p><p>Annie drew in a deep breath and crossed the room to the door, frowning when she saw the unbolted lock. Feeling very uneasy, Annie pushed the door open and blinked in the sudden bright light. “Ah, the princess has awoken from her slumber,” Morrigan called over, making Annie jump. The witch was reading a thick leather book. Flemeth was making something red that bubbled and steamed in an iron pot. Annie really hoped that it wasn’t blood, but perhaps Flemeth had killed a man like Morrigan said she would, and this was her meal. Maybe she was a vampire.</p><p>“Um, I’m assuming that’s not breakfast?” Annie asked the old witch.</p><p>Flemeth cackled with laughter. “Health potion, girl. There is bread and cheese on the table.” Flemeth pointed at a workbench propped against the hut’s wall. A potion. Of course.</p><p>Annie hadn’t eaten cheese for over a year, and she hoped that it wouldn’t make her stomach cramp. Hungrily, Annie scoffed down the bread with the hard cheddar-like cheese and gulped down the earthy water. She really hoped her stomach was strong enough for this sort of diet. “How does that work?” Annie asked Flemeth, who was still tending to the potion. “Does it fix everything?”</p><p>Flemeth looked at her with her golden eyes. “Elfroot is the main ingredient. You can increase its strength with other herbs and ingredients. This will clot the blood and heal most flesh wounds, but it cannot stitch everything back up,” Flemeth said, laughing then spluttering.</p><p>Annie narrowed her eyes. “I’m assuming that trouble is coming if you’re making such a large batch.” She said cautiously.</p><p>Flemeth eyed her for a long moment. “Observant. I would have never guessed, considering the tears,” said Flemeth, before she burst into more maniacal laughter. Annie’s eyebrows drew together in disgust and Morrigan gave a short laugh. Strange family dynamic here, Annie thought. “But yes, a Blight is coming… amongst other things.” Flemeth explained.</p><p>“What’s a Blight?”</p><p>“The Chantry teaches that Tevinter magisters defiled the Maker’s Golden City upon entering the Fade and unleashed a taint upon the world. Darkspawn gather in the Deep Roads to corrupt an Archdemon, which leads the creatures into battle. That is what is on the horizon,” said Flemeth. As the red mixture cooled in the pot, she placed funnels in small glass bottles and began to fill them. It reminded Annie of the videos of lipgloss tubes being filled on Instagram and TikTok.</p><p>“So… I’m assuming the Chartry… no, Chantry, is religious and the Golden City is like Heaven. The Archdemon is bad. The darkspawn are mindless. Why do I get the feeling that’s not the full story?” Annie said as she pondered on Flemeth’s explanation.</p><p>“Because it isn’t,” Flemeth replied easily, a twinkle in her cat-like eyes.</p><p>“And this Chantry, do they fight this Blight, or do they leave it and say it’s because of humanity’s sins?” Annie asked sarcastically. She knew how the story went. Flemeth guffawed with laughter before spluttering into coughs. Morrigan, though she hadn’t looked up from her book, smiled.</p><p>“The sins of mages, if we are being very, very specific. Though dwarves, elves and the like are not looked upon favourably.” Morrigan answered. She turned one of the pages in the book. Elves and dwarves? Like The Lord of the Rings? Annie decided not to question further, cautious not to irritate her… hosts.</p><p>She sat in silence, looking across the marsh in front of the hut. The day was overcast, making the water seem darker and muddier. A lone frog leaped from the shore to some rushes which grew in the water. Further away, a bird called. It was strangely peaceful, though it was rather worrying that the apocalypse was approaching, and Annie’s curiosity got the better of her.</p><p>“You don’t seem too worried. About the Blight, I mean.” Annie said evenly, careful not to provoke the witches. Flemeth had finished stopping the potion glasses with corks and looked at her. Annie shrunk slightly under her gaze.</p><p>“Tis nothing I can prevent.” She answered. Annie waited for a longer answer but was met with silence. “Do you have any other enquiries?” the old witch asked, quirking an eyebrow. Her body language seemed to suggest that Annie was getting on her nerves. Annie cursed herself for asking such stupid questions; the fact of the matter was that a Blight, Chantry, elves and magisters wouldn’t help her get home. She should have asked about how magic, the crystal, the orb and dimensions functioned so she could get home. Her heart ached for her family, friends and comforts. Perhaps later she would ask.</p><p>“Yes, uh, where should I wash my clothes?”</p>
<hr/><p>Scrubbing laundry by hand was painful. Annie broke three of her nails in the process and convinced herself that the soap she was given had caused a chemical burn. She draped her jeans, underwear and socks over a chair by the fire, then loitered by the shore as she pondered on what to do next. It was barely mid-afternoon, and it seemed she had exhausted all forms of entertainment: eating, sleeping, and cleaning. She had quickly discovered that she was unable to read the witches’ books and scrolls, which were written in strange circular symbols. Apparently Flemeth’s spell did not extend to the written word.</p><p>The two witches regularly disappeared through the tree line, and Annie could only speculate about what they were doing. Murdering men and running through the woods with a pack of wolves sprang to mind. Morrigan mentioned that they were tracking the darkspawn horde as birds, which sent a shiver down Annie’s spine. If those things showed up at the hut, she was just as likely to choke on her own vomit than to be killed by one of them.<em> Jesus</em>, those things stank.</p><p>Flemeth had told her that the humans of this land were assembling in the Wilds to fight the horde, apparently led by their young king. When Annie had asked the old witch about their chances of success, she had only received a cryptic ‘we shall see’ before Flemeth stalked off to do whatever she did. It did not ease Annie’s worry.</p><p>Left alone, Annie cried again for an hour or so, but beside the stinky marsh rather than inside, just for a change of scenery. Though she knew that screaming and crying and throwing rocks into the water would not take her back to Earth or bring back her planet if it had indeed been destroyed, it seemed she was at a loss for other things to do. Wallowing was something Annie was extremely good at. Skimming rocks, not so much.</p><p>Annie ran her hand through her hair as she angrily threw another pebble into the water. If she could read the books here, she might have been able to investigate ways to get back home. It felt strange, not being able to read; back home, she worked hard at school and was naturally gifted in academia. She held an offer for Spanish and History at Cambridge, for crying out loud. Here, she was illiterate, ignorant, and… useless. No wonder her only company kept disappearing for hours at a time. She must be so boring.</p><p>Annie peered at her reflection in the murky, stagnant water. Its green tinge did nothing for her appearance, she thought darkly. She ran her finger down her slightly crooked, bumped nose, and wiped some saliva crust from the corner of her mouth. Thinking about the oncoming acne breakouts due to stress and lack of proper skincare almost reduced her to tears again.</p><p>Something moved in the trees and Annie shot up. Though, if it were another darkspawn, she wasn’t sure what she could do, other than hit it with the frying pan left by the burnt-out fire. Thankfully, it was Morrigan, who sauntered her way to the hut, another dead hare in her hands. Blood oozed from bitemarks in its neck. She held it tightly but away from her body, almost as if she didn’t want to be dirtied by it. “Having fun staring at the lake?” she asked.</p><p>“Oh yes, whale of a time,” Annie replied. She wiped the dirt from the seat of her leggings and followed Morrigan over to the firepit.</p><p>“If you are looking for something to do, perhaps venture into the garden to find some ingredients for your supper, if you will not eat the hare,” Morrigan said flatly. She placed the hare on a wooden board and readied a wicked looking knife. “It might also provide a distraction from this,” the witch said, gesturing to the dead animal with the blade.</p><p>“Oh yeah… um, thank you,” Annie said nervously, looking at the hare’s glassy, dead eyeballs. “Is there anything I shouldn’t touch?”</p><p>Morrigan shrugged. “The root vegetables should be fine. In a few weeks the earth will be poisoned by the taint anyways.”</p><p>Annie nodded, but before she made her way to the vegetable patch, she asked: “Shall I make three portions of what I decide to eat? As a thank you…”</p><p>Annie caught the surprise that flashed across the young witch’s face before she expertly schooled it again. “If you wish.” Morrigan replied flatly.</p><p>Annie nodded again before making her way to the small vegetable patch behind the hut. It was enclosed by rotting fences, probably only still standing because of the green vines that had wound themselves round the beams. Annie squatted by the rows of foliage to try and make out what was what. Born and raised in suburbia, educated in cities and with an affinity for academia, Annie had never felt truly comfortable with the great outdoors. Sure, a country walk was fine enough, and good for photo opportunities, but recognising plants (to put in her stomach no less) was a rather daunting experience. She suspected that even if she were an expert on plants, the ones in Flemeth and Morrigan’s garden could be entirely different anyway.</p><p>Annie decided on pulling up one vegetable from each of the five rows to see what could be found.<br/>
A carrot-like root vegetable was first, Annie soon found out, after spending a few minutes aimlessly pulling at the leaves before she spotted a trough hanging on a rusty nail on the wooden hut’s wall. It was purple rather than orange, which made sense in a time before cross-genetic breeding, and she pulled up another.</p><p>Next, another root vegetable was plopped into Annie’s basket, presumably some sort of parsnip. Perhaps she could make a carrot soup, if celery was to be found anywhere. She did find some sort of green, crunchy thing which could serve as a substitute. As she thought about food, her mouth began salivating over the thought of pizza. Annie vaguely remembered that for many centuries Europeans did not eat tomatoes because the leaves were poisonous. It was not exactly a sunny climate, either, but a round of the vegetable patch led her to some. It was unsurprising that Flemeth and Morrigan were intelligent enough to know that they were edible. She left them for the time being.</p><p>When Annie returned to the fire after washing the dirt from under her fingernails, Flemeth had reappeared. “Making yourself useful?” Flemeth asked.</p><p>“I am indeed,” Annie replied. She didn’t want this old woman to think she was weak. Of course, Flemeth could probably crush her like an ant in a thousand different ways, but the principle remained. Being useless and boring was not a part of Annie’s identity. She rinsed the carrots and parsnips with water before finely chopping them up, along with an onion and bit of garlic Morrigan produced for her, while she asked the witch to boil some more water. The witch had huffed a sigh but seemed to understand her intent. Besides, it was easy for the mage to quickly bring the water to boil. Annie tried her best to sautée the ingredients in the iron pot over the fire, and though it was not as consistent as she would have liked, she managed it. She added the boiling water and let the witches know that it would take another ten minutes at least.</p><p>Flemeth sniffed the air and smiled. “We can salt the hare and leave it for another day. I am rather looking forward to this soup.”</p><p>Annie beamed at the old witch’s praise. Morrigan silently did as her mother bid. Other than the crackle of flames and the simmering of the soup, the three women remained silent. Annie mulled over pestering Flemeth with questions again, though she had waited almost the entire day. Annie tasted the soup; it was not the best, and probably needed a broth rather than water to thicken it, but it was edible. And almost vegan, she supposed, shoving the smell of cooking lard to the back of her mind. She added some more salt to taste before serving it in the same bowls from the night before. Morrigan cut some more bread and handed it round before they ate in silence.</p><p>“Where did you get the bread from?” Annie asked.</p><p>“A village on the edge of the Wilds. We do venture there for supplies.” Morrigan replied. Silence descended again. It was beginning to get dark, and Annie knew that if they were amongst the trees it would be pitch black already.</p><p>Pale, feeble moonlight managed to penetrate the clouds. Annie looked up, watching the smoky clouds drift on the wind, before almost dropping her bowl. There were two moons. One of them was so huge she felt as if she could reach up to touch it with her hand.</p><p>“Oh,” she said quietly. If she needed any proof that she was not on Earth, this was it. Unless she was hallucinating everything, of course, but Annie doubted that she would have been so quickly consumed by psychosis. The more she thought about it, perhaps it was better to believe that this was real, because if it wasn’t and she played along, it was not as if she would be able to suddenly break free from hallucinations. But on the off chance that it was real… she could do more harm to herself than good if she wallowed in self-pity, being the perfect snack for darkspawn.</p><p>“Do you wish to return home, girl?” Flemeth asked. Annie wondered why she never used her name, considering she had asked for it. Annie nodded and looked down at the carrot soup. Flemeth hummed. “I can see it in your eyes. You have been dwelling on this since you got here. I will tell you all I know so that you will stop sulking.”</p><p>Annie looked at the old witch. The fire illuminated Flemeth’s face, deep shadows emphasising her wrinkles and making her look centuries older. Whether the fire merely glinted in her eyes or it was just her unnatural eye colour, Annie couldn’t tell. Flemeth sighed and put her bowl down. “You will need a huge burst of magical energy to reopen the portal,” she started. Wormhole, Annie corrected in her head, but she let the witch continue. “Unless you wish to spend years searching abandoned tombs for similar artefacts, I suspect you only have one option,” Flemeth paused. “Killing the Archdemon or being in its vicinity when the final blow is struck should provide the magical power. Tis risky, however.”</p><p>A million questions whirred through Annie’s head and Flemeth laughed. She probably read her like an open book. “Speak, girl, and give your mind some peace.”</p><p>“Why is the killing of an Archdemon magical?”</p><p>“It destroys the soul of the Old God trapped inside,” Flemeth replied. Annie suspected there was more to it by the way the witch answered so quickly, but she pressed on. The details didn’t matter, anyway.</p><p>“How am I supposed to get close to it? Isn’t there a darkspawn horde protecting it?”</p><p>“I have seen Grey Wardens assemble in the wilds with the Fereldan forces. They are an ancient order sworn to defeat Blights. A Grey Warden must always strike the killing blow. Join them, and your path is before you.”</p><p>“The girl cannot fight, mother,” Morrigan said venomously. Annie bristled but recognised it to be true. As if a warrior’s order would let her join, who had only achieved fainting twice in the space of ten minutes and crying out her bodyweight in tears.</p><p>“Perhaps so, in the traditional sense. But you and I both know that walking between dimensions is no easy task. Throughout the millennia a handful of magical beings are known to have walked between the physical world and the Fade. Walking between the physical world and another realm entirely is something I have never seen before, and I am very old. Ha ha ha!” Flemeth guffawed. Annie looked down at her hands, remembering the way she had phased between planes of existence in bursts of pink and gold.</p><p>“So I should tell them I am an alien from another planet and darkspawn can walk through me?” Annie asked flatly.</p><p>“With a bit more flare, girl.” Flemeth replied, snarky. Annie stared into the flames and considered her options. She could stay here and wait for Flemeth to eat her, or the darkspawn to eat her, or she could venture into the wilderness for years on end or join a strange warrior’s order. All of those options seemed to point towards being eaten by darkspawn. Or Flemeth.</p><p>“What would you do?” Annie asked Flemeth.</p><p>“Well, one of the options makes for a more interesting story, hm?” the witch replied, laughing again. “Ah yes, and the tune changes…” she said with a smile, trailing off. Annie looked at Morrigan who seemed very bored and unamused. This must happen often, then.</p><p>“Tomorrow I’ll practice my… phasing. I doubt the Grey Wardens would want a sub-par cook who cries too much,” said Annie. Flemeth nodded.</p><p>“I shall wash the dishes,” Morrigan announced, as if it had been a normal family dinner and they hadn’t been discussing magic and interdimensional travel. Annie thanked her, then thanked Flemeth for her advice. She wondered back into the hut and peered at herself in her compact mirror, wondering how yellow her teeth were going to get before she could get a toothbrush and toothpaste again.</p><p>Annie undressed for bed and slid between the blankets, lower lip wobbling as she tried not to cry. If she sobbed the entire day and night she would have no tears left to cry, and Morrigan would be annoyed. She felt a rush of air as the door opened and one of the witches stepped inside. They faffed around for a bit before the other side of the mattress sunk.</p><p>“I do not envy you,” Morrigan’s voice cut through the darkness. Annie squeezed her watery eyes shut. “Power is power, but your path will be… difficult.”</p><p>Annie did not reply. She felt the witch roll over, then heard her blow out the candle. The room plunged into darkness. Annie held her tears in, eager to not irritate her new bedmate.</p>
<hr/><p>Over the next few days, Annie practiced her… skills. It ended up with her fainting plenty of times, or bleeding from her nose like Eleven, or with a migraine. Most days she woke early to meditate by herself, often by the marsh, as directed by Flemeth. Other days, Flemeth and Morrigan shouted at her to get out of bed before noon. Sometimes all Annie wanted to do was sleep. They had quickly found that the pink crystal acted as a sort of foci for the transfer of atoms (Annie had tried to explain that concept to the witches’ blank faces to varying degrees of success). She could do it without, but those times were the worst. The ones where she felt like her flesh had been stripped off her bones and her skull had been turned inside out.</p><p><br/>
Travelling between dimensions was difficult. It seemed as though great outbursts of emotion triggered the transfer; fear and anger were particularly effective, the trio had learned, when Flemeth had taken Annie closer to the darkspawn in a sort of trial by fire. As she fell to her knees when the creatures lunged for her, they could no longer touch her. But when she gained confidence, and maybe some arrogance, she had half-phased back into the physical plane and had caught a blade on her forearm. Screaming in pain, Annie had fallen to the ground, and ice engulfed the creatures. Morrigan and Flemeth shattered them with their staffs. A bitter healing potion and bandages left Annie fighting another day.</p><p>And then another. And then another. Meditation was difficult when she missed Earth with every fibre of her being; her parents, her friends, the food, the hot water, the soft clothes… even her brother. Breakouts on her chin made Annie almost throw her compact mirror into the lake. Thankfully, Morrigan had showed her how to make a paste out of elfroot that could clean her teeth.</p><p>Annie trialled different ways of triggering the transfer without resorting to putting her life in danger; she sang and danced to some happy songs, wondering if joy would elicit the same effect. That hadn’t been successful, and Annie powered down Caitlin’s phone before the battery became weaker. She couldn’t bring herself to use her phone just yet.</p><p>On the eleventh day, Annie had a breakthrough. In her usual meditation, Annie’s mind drifted from thoughts of being in a coma or psych ward, wondering if she was sitting crossed legged in a padded cell. She then recalled the feeling of transition between dimensions, and the science fiction films and Stephen Hawking documentaries she had watched. She theorized that she was somehow shifting her atoms between the usual first, second and third dimensions into solely the fourth, which she vaguely remembered as the one of time. She couldn’t quite remember, and she had never been particularly good at physics, so she could have been entirely wrong. But being present in the same physical space, but just out of time, made some sense.</p><p>As she thought on the theory, she visualised her atoms shifting between the dimensions. She envisioned it as looking at herself from a different angle; a straight, linear view of herself saw her sitting by the lake, but as she changed perspective, time was no longer linear. She imagined the surroundings changing like a flipbook. Autumn to winter to spring to summer and autumn again, changing depending on the angle.</p><p>She knew she could not visualise the fourth dimension accurately with her human mind, and began to grow frustrated, and so opened her eyes. Everything was in pink and gold lines. Stable. Calm. Annie reached out to pluck one of the golden strings that made up the water and watched it ripple. Huh. This was very similar to Interstellar, she thought, then suddenly the world spun, and everything was brown again.</p><p>“You are improving.” Flemeth said from behind her. Annie smiled. Annie hated being mediocre at things.</p>
<hr/><p>On the twentieth day, Annie had fallen into somewhat of a routine. Though she still cried about her situation often, Flemeth did not allow her to fall into despair. “Do you wish to see your family again or not, girl!” she would shout upon seeing Annie still in bed at noon. Annie would be kicked into action by the intimidating witch and practice meditation for hours a day, until she could shift between dimensions quickly and easily. She gardened and cooked for the witches who left the hut more frequently and for longer periods of time, presumably to track the darkspawn and armies that were assembling in the Wilds.</p><p><br/>
On the twenty-ninth day, Morrigan took her to face some darkspawn again, though this time Annie tried to stay calm and visualize the transfer. She almost panicked again when the darkspawn approached, their acrid scent filling Annie’s nostrils, but Morrigan assured her that she would come to no harm.</p><p>That day, Annie managed the transfer without anger or fear. She held a knife in her hand which still remained on the physical plane, though it took great focus. A genlock grappled for her. She looked in its eyes as its fingers passed through her neck. She couldn’t place the eyes; they were neither human nor animal-like. When its fingers closed round the neckline of her tunic and pulled it off her body, Annie smashed the knife into its neck, breaking her haze.</p><p>It fell to the floor, gargling, before it died. Morrigan had killed the rest of the darkspawn and Annie phased back into the blues and browns and greens, shivering as the breeze whipped at her now bare skin. The knife stuck out of the genlock’s neck and Morrigan pulled it out, a spurt of black, viscous blood following the blade. Morrigan looked at the black-stained tunic in the dead creature’s hands and wiped the knife on it. “Good. Though if you pay better attention, perhaps you can hold onto your clothes,” said the witch, “we shall burn the bodies and tunic.”</p><p>Annie watched the bodies burn, wrapped in Morrigan’s cloak, the awful smell filling the air. She had been vegetarian for four years, vegan for one, and she had just stabbed something with a knife and watched it die. But then Morrigan had said <em>good</em>, given her a small smile, and suddenly Annie didn’t feel quite so awful.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. the wardens</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>THE WARDENS</p>
<p>A month crawled by as Annie accustomed herself to living in Thedas. Annie had never lived so… primitively, before. She always refused to camp and hated staying away from home without her entire wardrobe and makeup collection. Instead of holidaying in Barcelona with some friends (which she had been looking forward to since the end of exams) she had killed darkspawn, pissed in chamber pots and the outhouse, and made a half-dozen different vegetable soups. Annie would give anything to have a glass of sangria by the beach instead of earthy water by the pungent marsh.</p>
<p>Morrigan and Flemeth regularly disappeared to keep an eye on the horde and the Fereldan army. Although Annie was used to spending days alone, sleeping until mid-afternoon and listening to music being amongst her favourite activities, even she began to despair at the isolation. Other than briefly listening to music on the phones (she did not use them much for fear of their batteries draining, and Caitlin and Phoebe’s music tastes were rather questionable), all Annie could do was meditate, cook, clean, stare at the lake, and sleep.</p>
<p>Asking the witches to teach her how to read their script was too daunting. Flemeth would be a terrible teacher, and Morrigan would probably laugh in her face, so she kept her mouth shut. Instead, Annie found some parchment and wrote down in English all the information that she could gather about this strange world. Morrigan and Flemeth did patiently explain concepts to her, at least; she learned about the different races that inhabited Thedas, their endless wars, their religious ideology, and, most importantly, the magic which made Thedas so different from Earth.</p>
<p>Annie spent many hours thinking about how magic could exist and be manipulated by such a small part of the population. Making ice, fire and electricity appear out of thin air could probably be explained with physics, but when Morrigan had demonstrated her ‘entropy’ skills and made darkspawn quiver in fear as their life drained from them, and when she had explained the existence of blood magic, Annie gave up trying to rationalise everything. Obviously, this universe operated differently to the one with which she was so familiar.</p>
<p>Morrigan was a strange character. She was cold, arrogant, capable, and independent. She told Annie that Flemeth had raised her in almost total isolation from other people, which explained some of her rudeness, at least. Annie couldn’t imagine such an upbringing. She was almost the complete opposite; she’d had a brother growing up, she had lived in a suburban, cosmopolitan area, and had attended school her entire life. She tried her hardest to endear herself to Morrigan, whether by cooking for her or asking about magic, but their personalities clashed often. Annie was weak and dependent in Morrigan’s eyes, and Morrigan was cold and even cruel from Annie’s perspective. Nevertheless, she desperately wanted the woman to like her (just so she could say she had made one friend, at least).</p>
<p>Whilst Morrigan and Flemeth stalked through the undergrowth and flew over the tops of the trees, Annie did her best to fix some of their tattered clothes and cook. As for most people, household chores did not interest Annie in the slightest, but without anything she particularly excelled at on this world, she supposed she didn’t have much of a choice. Morrigan had been surprised the first time Annie gave her some mended socks, but had thanked her, nonetheless. The next day, Morrigan had returned to the hut with a new tunic that fit Annie better. Although Annie didn’t really want to think about where the witch had procured it (just as likely from a corpse as a shopkeeper), Annie had smiled and thanked her.</p>
<p>Of course, their budding friendship was one of convenience more than anything, as they were somewhat stuck with each other’s company, but it became warmer by the week. Annie hoped that was the case, anyways. For all she knew, Morrigan and Flemeth were just manipulating her for their own ends, making her dependent on them for lack of other options. Not wanting to sulk, Annie settled on an ‘ignorance is bliss’ attitude instead. Besides, Flemeth was her best shot at getting back home, so she would dance to her stupid tune. God, Flemeth loved that metaphor.</p>
<p>On the thirty-third day, Morrigan returned to the hut with news. Annie was attempting a cheese toastie in the frying pan over the fire as Flemeth made her concoctions on the work bench. “The armies are almost all here,” Morrigan announced, “the Wardens are here, as well. They seem to have new recruits who are venturing into the Wilds on the morrow. Reinforcements from Redcliffe and Orlais still seem to be far away.”</p>
<p>Annie looked up at Flemeth. Their discussions about Annie getting back to Earth always seemed to end in Annie following or joining the Wardens to get to the Archdemon. Annie suspected that there were other ways, but Flemeth was adamant. It just made Annie even more suspicious of the old woman’s intentions. The witch in question set down her pestle on the rickety wooden bench. “We must expect them on the morrow, then. Morrigan, you shall meet them in the Wilds when they realise their feeble spells have worn away.” Flemeth ordered to her daughter, who merely nodded in return. For such a fiery, independent woman, Morrigan easily bowed to her mother most days.</p>
<p>“Why would they need to come here?” Annie asked, looking at the old dilapidated hut. She didn’t think that it would be a landmark for tourists.</p>
<p>“The Wardens left treaties that obligated mages, elves, and dwarves to aid them in a Blight in the Wilds, protected by spells. The spells wore away and I took them for safekeeping,” Flemeth explained. She picked up her pestle and resumed crushing the herbs in the mortar. Annie flipped the toastie with a spatula so it could brown on the other side. Her mouth watered, but she would give this first one to Morrigan, who had been scouting the Wilds all day.</p>
<p>“When they come here, do I just straight up volunteer?” Annie asked as she pressed the bread down with a spatula, listening to the fat sizzle. Flemeth sighed in thought, but it was Morrigan who answered.</p>
<p>“You could, though I am unsure if the recruits will have the authority to accept. They may ask you to prove yourself in combat…”</p>
<p>“And then I’ll have some uncomfortable questions to answer,” Annie mumbled, barely resisting the urge to rub her face in frustration. For such an underdeveloped, pre-industrial society, nothing was simple here. Morrigan sat by the fire, lifting her hands to warm them in the heat.</p>
<p>“Although you are not a mage, those imbeciles will call you one nevertheless, perhaps not helped by your association with the feared ‘witch of the wilds. At worst, they may presume that you are an abomination,” Morrigan continued, her voice tinged with disdain. Her golden eyes gazed into the fire, lost in thought. The crackle of the fire, sizzle of the fat and the clanging of Flemeth’s pestle drowned out the eerie silence surrounding the hut. Annie checked the underside of the bread, satisfied, then put the sandwich on a plate. She passed it to Morrigan who accepted with a rare smile.</p>
<p>“Perhaps you should join me to tell the Wardens of their folly. Though I prefer to enter the Wilds alone, perhaps it would be easier for you to show your combat capabilities while they presumably fight off darkspawn,” Morrigan offered. Annie looked at her in surprise; the witch let her know at every opportunity that she was a lone wolf and rarely desired company. Annie looked at the toastie Morrigan seemed to be enjoying and grinned. Her efforts to make the witch like her seemed to have paid off.</p>
<p>“I think you’re right,” Annie told her, “I can explain my… situation, when we get back to the hut.”</p>
<p>Annie looked up at Flemeth, seeking her approval, whose gaze flickered between her daughter and Annie. Like always, Annie couldn’t read her face. Flemeth laughed suddenly, grating at Annie’s ears, before exclaiming in glee, “Then you have finally accepted my advice, girl!”</p>
<p>Annie’s eyes narrowed and her cheeks tinged red. “Like you’ve been saying, I don’t exactly have a lot of options,” she said with a shrug. She pulled her jacket tighter to her body, hunching over in her seat. Flemeth sighed and set down her tools. She came to stand over Annie, who recoiled in intimidation. Flemeth grasped Annie’s face in her hands, and Annie could barely register the dirt that would inevitably clog her pores before her gaze was captured by golden eyes.</p>
<p>“Just remember that men are fickle, and cruel. I do not wish to see you hurt,” Flemeth said quietly. Annie blinked in disbelief at the old crazy witch’s sudden tenderness.</p>
<p>“I know,” Annie said in a wobbly voice, “I’ll make something up about waking up in the wilds with almost no memory.”</p>
<p>Flemeth smiled and patted her cheek before returning to her work bench. As Annie prepared Flemeth’s toastie, she wondered what life was like beyond the Wilds. The two women were strange, yes, but they were still her only friends here. They were mysterious and manipulative, but they hadn’t harmed her so far. Obviously, Annie couldn’t say the same for the men who would be arriving the following day.</p>
<hr/>
<p>Morrigan tracked the Wardens’ movements throughout the morning as a crow, watching them from branches in the trees. She told Annie and Flemeth that they were collecting vials of darkspawn blood, but were endlessly sidetracked by packs of wolves, strange rituals that summoned demons, and the few survivors of skirmishes who needed help. By mid-morning, Annie was clumsily following Morrigan through the thick undergrowth. The witch expertly led them through the forest, steering them away from larger groups of darkspawn and other trouble.</p>
<p>The leather boots Morrigan had found for Annie pinched her toes awfully. She had put her insoles from her Nikes into the boots so they somewhat supported her aching feet, but the hours of hiking through the Wilds made her feet so painful she could barely walk by the afternoon. Morrigan tutted her when she stepped on a branch too noisily. “You city-dwellers have no respect for the earth,” the witch chided. Annie was inclined to agree. The witch didn’t know the half of it.</p>
<p>“You have no idea,” she said darkly. Though it was cold so far south (Annie had learned they were in a southern hemisphere), sweat stuck her tunic to the nape of her neck and small of her back. When the wind cut through the trees and blew leaves onto the path, Annie pulled on her denim jacket. She wasn’t wearing her jumper, but she had put on her halterneck underneath the tunic, lest the darkspawn pull her clothes off again. Being half-naked in front of Morrigan had been embarrassing enough, but being half-naked in front of random medieval men would probably make Annie spontaneously combust.</p>
<p>Morrigan stopped suddenly, holding out her arm to prevent Annie trampling along the path. They had reached some collapsed ruins which lay between shallow lakes. “We shall wait here. The broken chest is on the first level.”</p>
<p>Annie nodded and sat down on the ground, flexing her toes and wincing at the pain. Morrigan seemed unbothered as she joined her. Annie rolled her neck and fished through her jacket pockets to find some bread, then handed some to Morrigan. Grainy brown bread with no other accompaniment was not the greatest lunch Annie had ever eaten. As they waited for the Wardens to show, Annie daydreamed about sushi and falafels.</p>
<p>Hoots and howls of darkspawn mixed with the clang of steel on steel drew their attention to beyond the ruins, and though they could not see what was happening, it was unmistakeably a skirmish. Annie turned her head to look at Morrigan, who smirked. The witch beckoned for Annie to join her amongst the undergrowth and they waited for the Wardens to appear.</p>
<p>One of the men called out for another to loot the darkspawn bodies. Annie’s lips curled at the thought of handling the stinky corpses, though she had seen Morrigan do the same thing. Sometimes the creatures carried small amounts of money, which was a bit baffling, Annie thought. Did they have darkspawn merchants and an economy? Did they pick up and carry around coins because they were shiny?</p>
<p>Four men entered the ruins. As Morrigan and Annie silently approached the small clearing, Annie craned her neck to try and catch a glimpse, though she only saw the tops of their heads. Two of them weren’t wearing helmets, and the man at the front of the group had dark brown hair pulled back into ponytail. Annie could just about see him kneeling at the broken chest when Morrigan straightened her back and strode down the grassy slope, Annie hurrying behind her.</p>
<p>“Well, well, what have we here?” Morrigan asked in a smug voice. The four men’s heads snapped to the side, the two unhelmeted men with scowls on their faces. Annie couldn’t tell whether it was because of their eyesight or suspicion. “Are you a vulture, I wonder? A scavenger, poking amidst a corpse whose bones were long since cleaned? Or merely an intruder, coming to these darkspawn filled Wilds of mine in search of easy prey?” Morrigan continued. The witch sauntered down the slope with ease, capturing the gazes of the Wardens as they watched her every step. Annie stumbled ungracefully behind her and wiped hair from her face as to see them better.</p>
<p>The one Annie assumed was the leader was a slim, pale, dark-haired man of average height. He had high cheekbones, grey eyes, a straight nose and thin lips. He wore leathers that were splattered with darkspawn blood and had two daggers strapped to his back. He watched Morrigan and Annie carefully, his face schooled into a neutral expression, waiting for them to pounce.</p>
<p>His companions were harder to make out. One of them looked very similar to him, but his hair was shorter and his face was broader. He was also wearing leathers and carried a bow, though they were noticeably more tattered. The other two men were taller and broader, wearing heavier armour that was splashed in even more dark blood. They both wore helmets which covered their faces, but the slightly shorter one carried a huge greatsword while the other carried a battered shield and longsword. Annie wondered what they thought of her and Morrigan; undoubtedly, the witch’s fine features and skimpy clothing were a lot more appealing than a spotty teenage girl wrapped in clothes that were too big for her.</p>
<p>“What say you, hm?” Morrigan pushed, crossing her arms, “Scavenger, or intruder?”</p>
<p>The leader considered her question before diplomatically answering, “I am neither. The Grey Wardens once owned this tower.” His voice was low and he enunciated his words clearly and sharply.</p>
<p>“Tis a tower no longer, the Wilds have obviously claimed this desiccated corpse. I have watched your progress for some time. Where do they go, I wondered? Why are they here? And now you disturb ashes none have touched for so long. Why is that?” Morrigan interrogated, walking past them to the edge of the mound. The leader’s eyes followed her, and he turned his back to face the witch.</p>
<p>The warrior with the sword and shield looked at Annie, hand hovering over his pommel. Annie barely resisted the urge to roll her eyes; she was annoyed that Morrigan baited the men like this, when they knew they were searching for the treaties. In her dramatic sauntering to the other side of the ruins, Morrigan had made it seem that the women were setting up a sort of ambush. Annie hoped she knew what she was doing.</p>
<p>“Don’t answer her. She looks Chasind, and that means others might be nearby,” the sword and shield warrior said in a low voice to the leader. Annie made her way over to Morrigan, feeling the men’s eyes on her, and her skin prickled.</p>
<p>“Ooh, you fear barbarians will swoop down upon you?” Morrigan mocked.</p>
<p>“Yes. Swooping is… bad,” the warrior replied. Annie stifled a snorted laugh. This was not the type of person Morrigan with whom liked to converse.</p>
<p>“She’s a witch of the wilds, she is. She’ll turn us into toads, she will,” the other archer said worriedly.</p>
<p>“Witch of the wilds? Such idle fancies, those legends. Have you no minds of your own?” Morrigan asked, before her gaze settled on the leader. “You there, handsome lad. Tell me your name and I shall tell you mine. Let us be civilized.”</p>
<p>Annie bristled at Morrigan’s tone. She was talking as if she wasn’t there, and it was Morrigan’s fault for going on such a dramatic tangent about scavengers and corpses that they hadn’t gotten to proper introductions. The dark-haired man considered Morrigan for a moment, then his gaze flickered to Annie. His eyes were light and piercing, and he was rather good-looking, but Annie kept her cool.</p>
<p>“I am Aedan. A pleasure to meet you both,” he replied easily.</p>
<p>“Now that is a proper civil greeting, even here, in the Wilds! You may call me Morrigan,” the witch said flirtatiously. Annie rolled her eyes and looked at Aedan, lightly raising an eyebrow. He flashed a bright smile in return. Morrigan caught the exchange and scoffed.</p>
<p>“I’m Annie,” Annie said simply. Aedan nodded in acknowledgement.</p>
<p>“Shall I guess your purpose? You sought something in that chest, something that is here no longer?” Morrigan continued.</p>
<p>“Here no longer?” the sword and shield warrior asked incredulously, “You stole them, didn’t you? You’re some kind of sneaky… witch thief!”</p>
<p>Annie barely held back our laughter as Morrigan replied mockingly, “How very eloquent! How does one steal from dead men?”</p>
<p>“Quite easily, it seems. Those documents are Grey Warden property and I suggest you return them,” the warrior replied, his tone more diplomatic.</p>
<p>“I will not, for it was not I who removed them. Invoke a name that means nothing here any longer, if you wish, I am not threatened.” Morrigan said coldly.</p>
<p>“Then who removed them?” Aedan asked. Oh God, these men were not ready to encounter Flemeth, Annie thought to herself. Growing bored of the beating around the bush, Annie picked at some dirt beneath her nails. Were all conversations in Thedas as dull and long-winded as this?</p>
<p>“’Twas my mother, in fact,” Morrigan replied.</p>
<p>“Can you take us to her?” Aedan asked. It seemed as though he did not fear the 'Witch of the Wilds' as much as his companions.</p>
<p>“Hm, there is a sensible request,” said Morrigan, who then laughed. “I like you.” Annie rolled her eyes again.</p>
<p>“I’d be careful… first it’s ‘I like you’…” the shieldman said in a high-pitched voice, “then zap! Frog time.”</p>
<p>For the first time in what felt like years, Annie genuinely laughed. A month without Twitter and TikTok and Instagram had made Annie rather miserable and unamused by Flemeth’s erratic attempts at jokes. Morrigan didn’t even try to crack jokes which weren’t at the expense of her housemates. Morrigan shot her a dark look and Annie cleared her throat.</p>
<p>“She’ll put us in all in the pot, she will. Just you wait,” the archer whined.</p>
<p>“If the pot’s warmer than this forest, it will be a nice change,” the other warrior added.</p>
<p>“Follow me, then, if it pleases you,” Morrigan said tiredly. Clearly, she only had patience for Aedan. Without waiting for their reply, Morrigan turned on her heel and started walking. Annie hurried after her, hearing the clanging of armour behind her as the Wardens similarly hurried to catch up.</p>
<p>The wind had picked up again and Annie pulled out her jumper from her rucksack, then she awkwardly tried to pull it on while holding her bag and jacket, which was an incredibly difficult task while avoiding gnarled tree roots and murky, sticky puddles. As she struggled with her layers, Aedan came up next to her and held his hand out. “I can hold those for you, if you’d like.”</p>
<p>Annie looked at him, then back at the other three men who stayed a considerable distance behind them. They were clearly suspicious of the witch and her intentions, no doubt raised on stories of Flemeth eating men and children. Annie couldn’t say that she blamed them, especially considering that the stories could be true. And, as Morrigan had predicted, that suspicion was extended to Annie as well. Why Aedan was unbothered by witches, Annie couldn’t tell, but she supposed that Aedan could have been raised far away from the Wilds.</p>
<p>Annie nodded and allowed him to take her jacket and bag. As she pulled on her jumper, she glimpsed Aedan examining her belongings. Right. They were machine-made and largely synthetic. <em>Shit.</em> Her jumper comfortably on, Annie took back her things and thanked Aedan. He fell into step beside her, and Annie wondered whether it was because he took pity on her, or he needed the company, or he was merely keeping an eye on her.</p>
<p>“You and Morrigan do not look like sisters, are you from the Wilds as well?” he asked. Annie heaved a sigh, looking upwards at the treetops. At their thickest, they barely let in any of the grey light.</p>
<p>“It’s a long story,” she replied.</p>
<p>“And I’m assuming it’s a long walk we’re on,” Aedan said with a smile. Annie looked at him out of the corner of her eye. He was very charming.</p>
<p>“A month ago, I woke up in the Korcari Wilds with no idea how I got there,” Annie conceded, “Morrigan and her mother took me in and cared for me.” It was all true, Annie thought, just not the whole truth. Aedan whistled lowly.</p>
<p>“Maker’s breath, you do not have any memory of how you arrived here?” he asked. Annie shrugged.</p>
<p>“Bits and pieces.” Maybe that was more of a lie.</p>
<p>“Hopefully you will recover your memories soon. Your family must be worried,” he said quietly. Annie felt a pang of anguish in her chest; she had spent every single night and most of the days wondering if her family were alive and, if they were, how devastated they would be.</p>
<p>“Yeah. I hope so too,” she said, stepping over a particularly high tree root. “How about your family? They must be worried that you’re traipsing round the Korcari Wilds with witches.”</p>
<p>Aedan’s eyebrows pulled into a frown and he glanced at his feet. “They…” he started, then cleared his throat. When he looked up again Annie thought she saw his eyes glistening with moisture. “They… were murdered, just two weeks ago…” he started explaining, and Annie felt her heart drop and her stomach twist. Oh shit. That was so not the right question to ask. Aedan seemed to ignore her physical shock and continued; “A Grey Warden got me out of the castle in exchange for my recruitment. My older brother wasn’t there, but he’s here, scouting the Wilds.”</p>
<p>“Shit. I’m… I’m sorry, Aedan. That’s the most horrible thing I’ve heard since waking up. And I thought I had it bad. That’s shit… that’s really, really shit,” Annie babbled. In her word vomit she stumbled over uneven ground and Aedan caught her arm, steadying her. She blushed at the thought of being the unsteady one when he had witnessed his family’s murder. Aedan gave her a watery smile.</p>
<p>“Even if we were to find my brother, I do not wish to tell him of their deaths,” Aedan explained sadly. He pushed some of his shorter, loose dark hair behind his ear. “Perhaps after the battle, I will.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, well, I doubt telling him during the battle would be very good for him,” Annie added, then mentally slapped herself for saying such a thing. She was never very good with comforting people. Aedan, however, laughed. It was loud, clear, and strangely enunciated, like the way he spoke.</p>
<p>“If I were being honest, I think that’s how Fergus would prefer. He could just slaughter darkspawn in his rage and focus on the battle rather than wallowing,” he said, flashing a bright smile at her again. Annie smiled back, surprised that her faux pas had not upset him.</p>
<p>“Yeah, I guess. The Blight waits for no one, right?” Annie laughed nervously.</p>
<p>“Exactly.”</p>
<p>A silence followed, as Annie thought on what to say next. It seemed that many icebreakers were either off-limits or were made awkward by both of their recent tragic circumstances; family, origin, and purpose were topics that she assumed neither wanted to touch. Annie had to play along with her amnesia story, at least until she could speak with their senior recruiter, and it was not as though she could ask Aedan his favourite film or band. Leaves crunched beneath their feet as they walked, and the wind grew stronger and stronger, until Annie relented to pulling her hair back. She swung her head to look at the three men at the rear of the group, who were equally silent.</p>
<p>“Do your friends talk?” Annie asked Aedan.</p>
<p>“When they have to. We have spent most of today fighting darkspawn, wolves, and wraiths. I think they are too tired to chat,” Aedan said with a shrug. Annie supposed that were feasible, but it hadn’t stopped them voicing their concerns about Morrigan.</p>
<p>“They didn’t even try to introduce themselves, though,” Annie told him.</p>
<p>“I think they were too scared of you and Morrigan,” Aedan explained, and Annie snorted.</p>
<p>“Me?”</p>
<p>Aedan smiled at her, reaching out to push a low branch out of their way before Annie walked into it face-first. “Yes, you. Two women appearing out of the Wilds with no armour can only mean one thing.”</p>
<p>Ah, so Morrigan’s other prediction has been correct, as well. They all assumed she was a mage. Annie did not want to explain her predicament to Aedan just yet, so she neither confirmed nor denied his implied suspicion. At her silence, Aedan continued speaking, and Annie knew that he had picked up on it. He seemed the type of person to do that.</p>
<p>“The one with the shield is Alistair. He’s the only actual Warden here, and the most recently inducted, so it fell to him to escort us. Jory is the one with the greatsword and Daveth is the rogue,” he explained. Now Annie could match names to… well, not faces, considering the helmets, but now she knew the names of the funny one, the quiet one, and the whiny one.</p>
<p>Annie was about to ask Aedan why he wasn’t walking them when Alistair suddenly shouted, “Darkspawn!”</p>
<p>Annie had barely processed what he had shouted when Aedan had already drawn his long daggers and dropped into a lower stance. Alistair had unsheathed his sword and drawn his shield up to his torso, Jory had drawn his sword and Daveth already had an arrow nocked and ready to go. The acrid smell of the darkspawn crept up Annie’s nostrils and she shivered. Her hands grasped the pink crystal at her neck and she tried to ground herself like she had done so many times during the past month.</p>
<p>When she opened her eyes, not noticing that she had closed them, Morrigan was by her side, her golden eyes scanning the trees. How Alistair had known they were there was a mystery, but then screeches and hoots filled the air. An arrow whizzed past Annie and embedded itself in the mud at Jory’s feet, who then pounded his chest with his armoured fists and shouted. That seemed to be the cue for the rest of the darkspawn, who emerged from the forest, tongues lolling out of their mouths.</p>
<p>Annie looked at Morrigan, who nodded. Most of the darkspawn descended on Jory and Alistair, though stragglers and archers targeted Annie, Morrigan and Daveth. Aedan had disappeared. As Morrigan blasted two darkspawn with a cone of ice, Annie thumbed the smooth edges of the crystal and pictured herself shifting dimensions, focusing on the sensation of her atoms moving and coming to a rest in a different time. As the wind disappeared and the sounds of battle became distorted, Annie opened her eyes, seeing the Korcari Wilds in strings of warm shades rather its usual brown and green.</p>
<p>As she had practiced combat with Morrigan and Flemeth, she had realised that it was too difficult to carry a weapon in the physical plane while staying untouchable herself. Faced with being useless in combat, Flemeth had enchanted a dagger with Annie’s ‘energy’, as she put it, using Annie’s belongings as points of reference, to make it easier for Annie to shift with it. Although Flemeth had said she had never been aware of Earth, her quickness to utilise its energy signature in enchantment had been rather startling, and Annie suspected that the witch had been lying. Nevertheless, it meant that she could carry the dagger with her in whatever dimension she found herself in, so her tactics for the time being were to disappear, approach a darkspawn, reappear, kill it, then disappear again, thought it was much harder in practice than theory.</p>
<p>Annie looked at the blob of warriors and darkspawn to her right. Alistair and Jory probably hadn’t noticed, but Daveth was looking at her with his mouth agape, only saved from a darkspawn’s dagger by Aedan who had suddenly appeared by the archer. Aedan looked at her, eyes wide, before he turned and shook Daveth’s shoulders. Annie drew in a deep breath, smiling at the lack of the smell of darkspawn and mud, before she stumbled over to a very confused genlock and stabbed it in the neck.</p>
<p>It made Annie wince as she phased in and out, just missing the spurt of black blood which would have certainly ruined her denim jacket. The quick shift between dimensions made her stomach lurch and she keeled over to stop herself being sick, the genlock falling to the floor in front of her. Whether it passed through her or not, Annie hadn’t noticed. Once her stomach stopped rolling, her attention turned to the blob of fighting further away. </p>
<p>Walking to the blob was confusing and tiresome, as if Annie were trying to run in a dream. Shapes were blurred by the string-like composition of the dimension and and the ground felt like water. Walking in a straight line consumed a lot of her energy. Annie phased in again and embedded her dagger in the back of what she assumed was a Hurlock. Her stomach protested and her head spun as she quickly shifted. She forgot her dagger as her eyes rolled into the back of her head in blinding white light, and she stumbled to the side as she lost her balance. Distantly, she could hear Morrigan shouting her name. Cold touched her skin before she realised that she had phased into the physical space again subconsciously, and she steeled her mind and nerves to completely render herself untouchable.</p>
<p><em>Fuck</em>, Annie thought to herself, remembering the dagger that was now trapped under a Hurlock corpse. She had nothing with which to attack the darkspawn, her only option left being to trip them up. As her head spun and she formulated a plan (which was to go back to Morrigan and hide behind her), Alistair was knocked to the floor by a Hurlock and his sword flew out of his hand. Annie looked desperately to the others, but they were all occupied by their own assailants. The Hurlock raised its huge maul in its hands and Alistair did not have the strength nor dexterity to roll to the side before the Hurlock tried to cave his chest in. Alistair raised his shield and blocked the blow, groaning in pain, as the Hurlock began to raise its arms again.</p>
<p>It was a good thing two-handed weapons took a while to raise, Annie thought in a daze, as she found herself in front of the Hurlock, whose surprise afforded her some time to grasp the weapon in its hands and focus her mind on isolating it from all dimensions except the fourth. She prayed to every entity that her half-formulated plan would work. The Hurlock had raised its maul but when his arms came down in the killing blow, its hands were empty. Annie immediately dropped the maul to the floor with a hiss of pain, narrowly missing Alistair’s legs, but the warrior had been given the time to kick out the Hurlock’s legs and pick up his sword again, running it through the darkspawn’s chest.</p>
<p>Annie fell to her knees as the world whirled by in a whizz of brown and black and grey and green. A genlock sensed an opportunity to strike, and Annie squinted as it ran toward her with a dagger in each hand, and  Alistair blocked its blow with his shield, knocking it straight back into Jory’s greatsword. Annie felt herself fall to the side again before armoured hands grasped her shoulders and hauled her upwards. The bread and cheese from earlier threatened to make a reappearance, and Annie hacked up some foul-tasting spittle on the grass.</p>
<p>Her ears were ringing and the light was too bright. She felt Morrigan’s cold, dainty hands on her skin as the witch gently sat her on the floor, allowing her defender to keep on fighting. The world came back into focus and Annie saw Morrigan’s face swim in front of her; the witch’s mouth was moving but Annie couldn’t process what she was saying. Maybe Flemeth’s spell had worn off.</p>
<p>“Is she alright?” she heard one of the Wardens say, after a few minutes. She vaguely recognised it to be Alistair’s voice.</p>
<p>“She will be fine. It is just exhausting for her to do… that,” she heard Morrigan reply. Annie closed her eyes, waiting for the world to stop swaying, then opened them again. Five people were looking at her.</p>
<p>Alistair and Jory had removed their helmets, but before Annie could examine their faces, Daveth exclaimed, “She’s not even a witch, she isn’t! She’s an abomination!”</p>
<p>Morrigan almost hissed at the man, who recoiled under the witch’s piercing gaze. “She is not a demon, nor a spirit, nor an abomination,” she snapped. Morrigan wiped away the tears that were threating to fall from Annie’s eyes.</p>
<p>“I’ve never seen a mage do that before,” Alistair said lowly. Aedan hummed in agreement.</p>
<p>“I shall explain once we arrive at my mother’s hut. Tis a long story.” Morrigan said wearily.</p>
<p>“A long story indeed.” Aedan murmured.</p>
<p>Annie blinked away the moisture clouding her vision, wanting to speak up for herself but being prevented by her dry mouth and hoarse throat. Aedan was splattered with darkspawn blood, and a cut on his arm dripped red blood down his pale skin. Jory, who was an older, heavy-set redhead, was wiping down his sword. Daveth stood further away, watching her carefully. Annie’s eyes then landed on Alistair, who was standing closer to her, concerned.</p>
<p>His skin was golden, his short hair was strawberry blond, and his eyes were honey-brown and framed by long eyelashes under arched eyebrows. His nose was large but perfectly straight, his cheekbones were high, and his jawline and chin were strong. A smattering of freckles dusted his nose and cheeks and the hint of stubble lined his jaw. Annie gulped. Aedan was good-looking, for sure, but Alistair was… gorgeous. And she had just almost thrown up all over him.</p>
<p>“Are you sure she isn’t an abomination?” Alistair asked Morrigan. Annie huffed in annoyance, suddenly forgetting Alistair’s handsomeness.</p>
<p>“Yes, and if you even think of smiting her, I will turn you into a toad. We shall explain at mother’s, lest darkspawn pounce on us,” Morrigan replied coldly. She held out her hand and Annie took it, allowing the witch to pull her up. Annie dusted the dirt off the seat of her leggings and gulped down some water from her waterskin.</p>
<p>The Wardens took this as a dismissal and Daveth and Aedan went to loot the bodies. Annie braced her hands against her knees as her lunch rose up her oesophagus again. Jory remained quiet but eyed her suspiciously. Alistair frowned slightly, and he considered her for a while, his expressive face ranging from eyes narrowed in suspicion to a smile tugging at his lips. Annie didn’t know what to feel under his gaze; usually, men looked her up and down in clubs, looking to see if she was worth a dance. Here she looked terrible, with her acne and dark circles and greasy hair and unplucked eyebrows.</p>
<p>Alistair seemed to have finished considering her and he picked his helmet off the floor. “Well, whatever or whoever you are, I suppose I should thank you for stepping in there, literally.” he said, turning his helmet around to show Annie the faint, muddy footprint across the eyeslit. Annie blinked. She must have appeared out of thin air only to be standing on his bloody face. She looked at Alistair cautiously, a bubble of anxiety growing in her chest, but he only flashed a grin at her, and Annie laughed as her fear dissipated. And then she laughed some more, until her stomach hurt.</p>
<p>She saw Morrigan roll her eyes, who was obviously not amused by Alistair. “Sorry about that, I was focusing too much on trying not to collapse,” she told the warrior.</p>
<p>“Ah, I know the feeling,” Alistair agreed, wiping down his sword on the dead hurlock’s clothes, “though if I had to choose between being crushed by a hurlock’s maul or having you step on my face, you could step on my face anytime,” he continued, then his cheeks flashed red and he looked up at Annie with a wince. Annie laughed again, which aggravated her sore throat, and she spluttered an unattractive cough. “Forget I said that… you… you know what I mean,” Alistair stuttered, and Annie nodded.</p>
<p>“I’ll give you a shout whenever I want to step on someone’s face,” Annie told him, and he blushed again, busying himself with wiping his sword down.</p>
<p>“Yes, yes… you do that.”</p>
<p>“Here,” Aedan suddenly interrupted, and he held out her dagger, pommel facing her. Annie smiled and took it from him, seeing that he had already wiped the blood off the blade.     </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. the joining</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER FOUR: the joining</p><p>Annie was bone-weary as they followed Morrigan to Flemeth’s hut. The witch gave Annie a small red potion to settle her stomach. It was bitter, thick, and generally unpleasant, but it eventually stopped Annie from almost throwing up her guts with every step she took. Her feet ached awfully and she shivered in the cold. She looked ahead to Morrigan, who seemed fine even in her skimpy purple scarf thing.</p><p>Initially after the skirmish, Aedan had fallen back to talk quietly with Alistair. He was excellent at whispering just quietly enough that Annie couldn’t hear anything even when she strained her ears; Alistair’s voice was louder, but he mainly nodded and agreed with whatever Aedan was saying. Whenever Annie looked back at them, their eyes flickered between her and Morrigan. Annie scowled as she turned back, kicking up some dirt with the toe of her boot. No wonder Morrigan and Flemeth didn’t give men the time of day.</p><p>Annie wondered if it would be suspicious to put some earbuds in and listen to some music. She had already blown her cover with her clothes and… ability, and, with no-one to talk to, the hike was becoming tedious. She looked at her surroundings, deciding what sort of vibe the Korcari Wilds had. The trees were very old, with huge, gnarled trunks and deadly roots that broke the muddy paths. Whether they were surrounded by marshes or swamps, Annie couldn’t tell, but the water was stagnant and smelly. It was the perfect place for witches to live, Annie thought to herself, so maybe some Stevie Nicks and Kate Bush would be appropriate.</p><p>Her thoughts were interrupted by her boot catching on a root and she stumbled, just about managing to keep her balance. Aedan materialised beside her and laughed. “Wherever you come from, I assume it was not from around here,” he said smugly. Annie pulled a face at him as she scraped her muddy boot on a tree trunk.</p><p>“And you are?” Annie asked. Despite his physical similarities to Daveth, Aedan had finer features, better armour, and a posher voice. She hazarded a guess that he was actually from a well-off family.</p><p>“I am from Highever, on the northern coast. There are some woodlands but nothing as old as this forest,” Aedan replied.</p><p>“Can I ask you a question?” Annie asked. Aedan gave a small smile and raised his eyebrows.</p><p>“You’ve already asked quite a few.”</p><p>“I mean… a weirder question. Why are you talking to me of all people? The other three keep their distance from me and Morrigan, but you don’t…” Annie’s voice trailed off. She was unsure where this question was going. Aedan breathed in deeply, looking around the forest.</p><p>“Truthfully, I thought that if you decided to attack, I would be able to kill you rather easily,” he began to explain, and Annie’s steps faltered as she processed his words, “but after seeing you… disappear, then reappear again, I am not so sure. Being your… ally, is preferable to being your enemy, I think.”</p><p>Annie looked at the forest floor, watching her boots crush soggy leaves into the mud. Everybody had ulterior motives here, apparently. Aedan wasn’t being nice; he was being pragmatic. “Ugh, is everybody so manipulative here?” she asked, annoyed. Aedan laughed, clapping Annie’s shoulder. She hoped his dirtied and bloodied gloves wouldn’t mark her denim jacket.</p><p>“You have a lot to learn, Annie,” he said simply. <em>You have no idea.</em></p><hr/><p>They arrived at Flemeth’s hut in the late afternoon. Annie made a b-line for the outhouse before introductions had been properly exchanged; she would let Flemeth and Morrigan explain everything, not wanting to be caught in Aedan’s piercing gaze again. She heard the group talking beside the firepit as she hurriedly pulled her leggings down before she pissed herself.</p><p>When she was done, she walked past the vegetable patch to reach the back door, slipping inside the hut. She sat down on the rickety bed with a groan and fell backwards, letting her head hit the lumpy mattress. On Earth, Annie could run almost eight kilometres in a decent time (if the weather was alright and she hadn’t overeaten and she was practicing regularly), but her whole body ached after seven hours of hiking.</p><p>She hadn’t even taken off her shoes or rucksack when her eyelids started sagging. She was about to fall asleep when the door flung open, startling her, and Morrigan appeared by the bed. Annie blinked lazily in the light. “Your presence is required,” Morrigan told her, before turning on her heel and leaving the hut as quickly as she had come in.</p><p>Annie sighed and rubbed her eyes with the heel of her hand, stars bursting behind her eyelids. A nap would have to wait. She shuffled to the door. The four Wardens were sitting by the fire, with Morrigan and Flemeth on the other side. Annie stood in the doorway awkwardly and Morrigan gestured to the spot next to her. Annie gulped as she went over, idly thinking that the set-up looked like a stand-off between the men and women. Her joints creaked as she sat down. Everybody looked at her.</p><p>“We ran into some spirits and a corpse of a mage in the Wilds. Perhaps they played a role in how you got here, but we killed them,” Aedan began. Annie looked at him and nodded, then cleared her throat.</p><p>“I guessed as much,” she said lowly. Alistair gave her a small smile.</p><p>“We hear you are considering joining the Wardens,” Aedan continued, and Annie nodded again.</p><p>“Morrigan and Flemeth have looked after me, but I think it’s time I moved on. I can’t remember much, but maybe having a… purpose, will be the best thing I can do,” Annie explained. She hoped her lie was believable enough; it only needed to serve her for a day or so, until she could reach the Archdemon and have its weird magic powers send her home.</p><p>“Duncan can be… picky, about recruits. But we can at least escort you to the camp, and you can make your way to wherever you like after the battle, but we cannot protect you from the Templars,” Alistair told her. His helmet rested by his outstretched leg.</p><p>The thought of a medieval battle was terrifying (Annie shivered as she thought of some of the battle scenes from Game of Thrones), but Annie nodded, knowing that Alistair and Aedan’s offer was her best bet at getting close to the Archdemon. It was not as though she could transform into a bird like Morrigan and fly over the battlefield; she probably would be shot down by arrows, anyway.</p><p>“I guess that’s all I can ask for. Thanks,” she told them.</p><p>“Good. Now that we have the treaties, we can begin the journey back to Ostagar. If we keep moving, we may reach the gates just after nightfall. The battle is planned for midnight, when the horde is expected to show,” Aedan explained, getting off the ground and brushing his filthy leathers down. Annie’s smile faltered. No nap, then. She didn’t know if she could go five paces before her knees would give way.</p><p>“I’ll get my things,” Annie said quietly. Daveth fidgeted with an arrow in his hands while Jory stared morosely at the water. Flemeth watched the men with those intense eyes, a small, deranged smile on her lips. The two women followed Annie into the hut.</p><p>As Morrigan closed the door behind them, blocking Aedan’s curious view, Flemeth handed a tattered rucksack to Annie. “You best leave some of your belongings here as not to attract unwanted attention,” the old witch explained. Annie nodded and emptied out her own rucksack in a daze. Leaving behind some of her only connections with Earth made her chest feel hollow. She packed her underwear, phone, earbuds, umbrella, charger, moisturizer and lip balm, leaving the rest behind. Morrigan handed her another pair of socks and tunic.</p><p>Flemeth neatly folded Annie’s jeans and jacket and put them in the chest at the foot of the bed, along with her Nikes and other belongings. Despite the witch’s annoying habits and manipulative ways, Flemeth had been mostly kind to her. Annie started to doubt whether venturing into a camp with thousands of unknown men was actually a good idea. Morrigan seemed to have the same idea, as she prepared a pouch of elfroot, health potions, and a vial of what Annie had learned earlier was poison.</p><p>“I want to say…” Annie started awkwardly, her voice hoarse, and she cleared her throat before continuing, “thank you. For all you have done for me. You could have left me to die in the swamp.”</p><p>“Tis not every day a traveller between worlds requires our aid,” Flemeth said with her signature cackle. “Hmm.”</p><p>“I’m assuming you will be watching the camp?” Annie asked Morrigan, who nodded. The witch gave her a smile as she handed over the pouch.</p><p>“You shall not come to harm whilst I am there, Annie.” Morrigan said quietly. Annie detected a hint of disbelief in the witch’s voice, almost as if Morrigan couldn’t believe what she was saying. Annie smiled and thanked her again.</p><p>“Ah, here it is!” she heard Flemeth exclaim behind her, and she turned to see the witch flapping a thick, coarse knitted jumper to rid it of dust. “Do not pretend we have not noticed your weak constitution, girl. You will drop dead from cold before you even cross those gates.” Flemeth chided.</p><p>As Annie pulled on the jumper, and let Flemeth settle the cloak around her shoulders, she glanced around the small hut, wondering if it would be the last time that she would ever see it. Flemeth tied the cloak’s strings together quickly, then patted Annie’s cheek. The old witch was standing but a few inches away, and the deep wrinkles on her face were thrown into soft shadows by the low light in the hut. Despite the witch’s old age, her golden eyes were bright and youthful.</p><p>“Though the journey is long, little girl, everything will make sense in the end. Harmonized, if you will,” Flemeth said softly, and she spluttered a laugh that turned into a cough. Annie smiled uncomfortably, unsure of how to respond. Flemeth merely cackled again and opened the door, dust flying into the draft and catching in the rays of the low sun.</p><p>When Annie re-joined the Wardens, who seemed eager to leave the witches’ abode and the threat of being stewed, she looked back at her hosts. Morrigan gave a small wave before nodding at Aedan, who returned the gesture. They left the hut quickly and quietly, and when Annie turned back again, she caught an odd glint in Flemeth’s eye. Flemeth seemed to sense Annie’s distrust and winked, shouting at Morrigan to fetch her some knives and a pot to prepare for dinner, and to not bother hunting for meat.</p><p>Unless the two witches had suddenly turned vegetarian, it seemed a little strange, considering their preference for hare. Annie thought that they would have been eager to rid themselves of her tricky diet, and Annie kicked up a stone in the path, watching it bounce off Alistair’s boot. She was alone, again, travelling with strange men to fight in a medieval battle.</p><p>Annie stifled a laugh at what her life had become. It felt like years had passed since she had gone shopping in Camden, or had eaten food with any ounce of seasoning in it. She at least hoped that Morrigan had picked up on the importance of seasonings in meat-free dishes to make their soup that night, though the witches could have just used meat instead.</p><p>Annie smiled, glowing at their decision to spare a poor animal from their pot. Aedan turned to her and, seeing her smile, grinned at her. “Do you reckon they’ll let us back to their hut if the battle goes to shit, if we bring you with us? They seemed fond of you,” he asked her. Annie pulled a face, knowing that Morrigan and Flemeth had little affection for her.</p><p>“I think they would turn us all into toads,” she replied easily, “and put us in a soup.”</p><p>“I think you give them too little credit. Alistair, Jory and Daveth would definitely be frogs. I could grovel at their feet and perhaps be spared, but I think they would welcome you back like a daughter. Flemeth mentioned that she had gathered some carrots from their garden because you were a picky eater but liked carrot soup,” Aedan disagreed. Annie grinned; her hard work at socialising with them had paid off. Then, however, her smile faltered, and her brows drew together in thought.</p><p>“Wait… Flemeth picked the carrots today?” she asked Aedan, who shrugged.</p><p>“I think so. She said she had spent the whole afternoon in the vegetable patch, picking and planting carrots, and she had fresh dirt on her hands,” he answered. Annie frowned, looking ahead at the twisting path.</p><p>Flemeth preferred leak and potato soup, as she had told Annie many times throughout the past month, and Morrigan was partial to butternut squash. Why would they suddenly love carrot soup so much? Was it to remind them of Annie, for whom they had cared for the past month, and who was going into battle?</p><p>Or did they expect her back?</p><hr/><p>The long hike to Ostagar was quiet. Alistair said that the darkspawn were probably gathering for the battle that night, as well. Other than a group of hungry wolves, the group faced no trouble, even when the sun began to set and the woods grew dark and eerie. Annie wondered if Morrigan was following them, and when her eye caught a black crow soaring over them, she supposed she was. That was some comfort, at least.</p><p>As the huge wooden gate came into view, Annie sighed in relief. She had never been so exhausted in her entire life, though she supposed that Alistair and Jory had had it worse in their heavy armour. Even just carrying a relatively light rucksack made Annie’s back hurt. Alistair called out to the guards to let them through and the gate slowly swung open with a loud creak.</p><p>After weeks of almost total isolation, the camp at Ostagar was overwhelming. Firstly, Annie realised, the camp stank. Badly. Waves of body odour and the smell of dogs and open latrines made Annie’s eyes water and she pulled up the collar of her jumper over her nose. Next to her, Aedan smirked. Secondly, hundreds of men (and some women, Annie noticed), were sitting around the entrance, fixing armour and sharpening weapons. The cacophony of shouts, barks and steel rang through Annie’s ears. A few of the soldiers looked up as they passed. Fereldans, it seemed, were characterised by large noses, pale skin, and their tall height.</p><p>Women in bright yellow and red robes were walking between groups of soldiers with incense, chanting prayers and holding out their hands to bless people’s foreheads. Annie assumed that they must have been part of the Chantry. Soldiers wearing much heavier, silver armour were positioned around camp. They had long purple sashes and stood perfectly still. Large silver helmets covered their faces. They must have been the Templars, and Annie felt a shiver roll down her spine. Aedan took them left and Alistair caught Annie’s arm so that she didn’t veer off into the crowd.</p><p>Aedan gave a bunch of white flowers to a man guarding kennels, who thanked him for finding them. Annie raised an eyebrow. “Admirer?” she asked, and Aedan spluttered before laughing nervously.</p><p>“No, he needed the flowers to protect the Mabari from the taint,” Aedan replied, a ghost of a smile on his lips. By now, the sun had completely set, and the camp was illuminated by campfires, torches, lamps, and the two huge moons. As they left the kennels, a huge dog came bounding up to Aedan and barrelled into the man, knocking him to the floor. Annie jumped behind Jory to avoid the dog’s over-excited slobber, but Aedan only laughed, scratching the dog behind its ears and cooing. “Is he yours?” she asked in a small voice, and Aedan nodded.</p><p>“His name is Potato,” Aedan replied, and Annie laughed. “I named him as a child.” Aedan added, by means of explanation. He pushed the slobbering dog away and got to his feet. Potato looked at the wardens, his smushed-in face inquisitive, before he came over. He sniffed around Alistair and Annie before sitting down on Annie’s aching feet.</p><p>“Ow,” Annie winced. The dog was very, very heavy, and her feet were very, very painful. Aedan laughed and grabbed Potato’s collar, urging him away. He slapped the dog’s back as it wandered away.</p><p>“I think he likes you.”</p><p>Annie beamed. She was more of a cat person herself, as dogs were smelly and over-excitable, but they were still cute. Alistair led them towards a bonfire between pillars, where a man was waiting with crossed arms. He had dark skin, black hair, and a rather exceptional beard. Two daggers were strapped to his back. He uncrossed his arms as they approached, his expression neutral. The bonfire was taller than she was, Annie realised, and the heat coming off it made her skin itch. “That’s Duncan,” Alistair whispered to her.</p><p>“So, you return from the Wilds. Have you been successful?” Duncan asked, his voice oddly calming. He looked at Annie, a frown barely crossing his features, before Aedan replied.</p><p>“Not that it was easy, but yes.”</p><p>“Good. But may I ask who your companion is?”</p><p>“Maybe we should tell you about Morrigan and her mother.” Aedan answered.</p><p>“This is Annie. She was at the tower with a woman called Morrigan, whose mother had the scrolls. They were both very… odd.” Alistair explained.</p><p>“Are you and these women Wilder folk?” Duncan asked her. Annie wasn’t sure how to reply.</p><p>“I… I don’t think I am. They might be. They’re mages.” She replied.</p><p>“Apostates, probably,” Alistair added. Duncan cocked his head to the side, mulling over their words.</p><p>“You said that you do not <em>think</em> you are Wilder folk?” he asked carefully.</p><p>“A month ago, I woke up in the Korcari Wilds with no memory of how I got there. Morrigan and her mother took care of me, and we think that Alistair and the recruits killed the spirit or found the dead mage that brought me here. I wanted to come here to… get out of their hair, and help against the Blight,” Annie said quietly.</p><p>“You wish to join the Grey Wardens?” Duncan asked. Annie hesitated; she wasn’t sure she wanted to join the Order when all she wanted was to be near the Archdemon at its death but joining would be the only way to ensure her presence. If she said no, Aedan and Alistair would be pissed and she could be sent away.</p><p>“Yes,” she replied, though Duncan caught her hesitation.</p><p>“I cannot allow just anyone to join,” he said, looking her up and down. Obviously, her lack of weaponry, armour and muscle suggested that she was no fighter. Annie opened her mouth to challenge him when Aedan interrupted.</p><p>“We have seen her in combat, Duncan. She is more than capable and… unique.”</p><p>Daveth snorted behind them. Aedan shot him a dark look. “Unique?” Duncan questioned.</p><p>“I have… certain abilities. I think I got them from whatever brought me to the Wilds. Morrigan and her mother helped me practice them.” Annie tried to explain. Duncan raised an eyebrow, sceptical.</p><p>“But you are not a mage?” he asked, and Annie shook her head. “An abomination?”</p><p>“Well, Morrigan said that she was neither abomination, nor demon, nor spirit, blah, blah blah,” Alistair cut in, “but I can check, now that we’re away from the witches.”</p><p>Duncan acquiesced with a small nod, and Alistair turned to look at Annie, who stared back blankly. Suddenly, a rush of white light engulfed her, but it disappeared quickly. Fuzzy colourful shapes dotted her vision as she blinked. Alistair frowned. “There is something… fade-like, in her, but usually a smite completely floors an abomination or mage,” Alistair said carefully. Annie wondered if Morrigan had seen the exchange, and if she would leap down from a branch to turn Alistair into a frog like she had promised.</p><p>“Like Aedan said… it’s unique?” Annie tried to explain, but came out more like a question, and Annie cringed.</p><p>“I see,” said Duncan, “perhaps you should show me your abilities.”</p><p>“In the tent, I think, we do not want the Templars to descend on Annie like dogs,” Aedan cut in quickly.</p><p>Duncan ushered Annie into a nearby tent, leaving the others outside. She just about caught Jory complaining about the delay when Duncan lit some candles and let the flap fall over the entrance. He nodded for her to begin and Annie grasped the crystal, closing her eyes and imagining the shift. She heard a sharp intake of breath as she felt her atoms move, and she opened her eyes to see the tent disappearing and the world becoming strings of dark red. She vaguely saw Duncan reach out, his fingers passing through her shoulder. When he withdrew his arm, she focused on shifting again, until the tent was cold and dark once more.</p><p>A headache pounded behind her temples, but she managed to keep her food down. “Hmm,” was all Duncan said. Annie watched the man as he paced the tent in thought. Annie drank from her waterskin to wet her dry mouth. Duncan then looked up, eyes narrowing slightly, before clearing his throat.</p><p>“You have a unique gift. I suppose you do not know how you received it. There is no doubt that a rogue with an ability such as yours would be very useful indeed,” he began, stepping forward to look Annie in the eye. She straightened her back under his gaze. “Though I must confess my distrust. I struggle to understand why you would want to join an order sworn to protect Thedas from the Blight, and a part of me thinks it has something to do with those women who cared for you.”</p><p>Annie blinked. He was an intuitive man, apparently. She sighed, her shoulders falling. “I suppose I’ll have to tell you the truth, then. It’s the only story where everything makes sense.”</p><p>Duncan raised a dark eyebrow and nodded for her to continue. Annie drew in a breath before words tumbled out of her mouth quickly, as if she were a small child caught in a white lie. “I’m not from Thedas at all, actually. A month ago, I was shopping with my friends in a city called London, in a country called England, on a planet called Earth. A man broke a crystal orb in front of me and opened some sort of portal, and I was transported here. He died. I realised I could shift between… realms, something I could never do before. Morrigan’s mother said that I might be able to get back home using a huge burst of magical energy, such as killing an Archdemon, or being near it. That is why I want to join the battle.”</p><p>Duncan’s eyebrows raised further. “A strange tale,” he said quietly, and Annie was unsurprised that he didn’t believe her. Apparently Flemeth had been more accustomed to crazy stories of interdimensional travel.</p><p>“I can show you… something from Earth,” Annie said cautiously, and she reached into her rucksack to take out her phone. She turned it on, watching Duncan startle as the Apple logo flashed on the screen. When she showed him the pictures of her family, friends, and homeland, and when she had even played him some Led Zeppelin, Duncan’s cool demeanour broke down and he stared at the phone with wide eyes, his eyebrows drawn together. Annie awaited his response. Duncan seemed to be at a loss for words. He suddenly turned his back to her, pacing the tent, thinking, before he turned around again.</p><p>“I must confess my surprise and curiosity, though I cannot dwell on this... revelation, at this moment. Do the others know the truth?” he asked, stroking his beard.</p><p>“No. Only Morrigan and her mother. It’s… hard, to explain,” Annie replied quietly.</p><p>“And you expect them to trust you in battle, despite your lies?” Duncan asked. His tone was not accusatory, but his question nevertheless revealed his emphasis on honour. Annie frowned and steeled her nerves, now angry.</p><p>“Whether they trust me or not is up to them, and it doesn’t matter whether they know my true intentions or not. If all goes to plan, I go home and the Archdemon is defeated. If I had told them the truth, they probably wouldn’t have believed me and distrusted me as a madwoman. In case you haven’t noticed, I am very, very, far from home at the moment. I am vulnerable, so excuse me for trying to protect myself.”</p><p>Duncan hummed in thought, his back still turned, as he mulled over her answer. “Let me be clear in this; I will recruit you into the Wardens to help you find a way back to your homeland, and your… ability, will be an advantage, but I cannot delay the killing of the Archdemon if you are not there. When, or if, the Archdemon shows, myself and my fellow Wardens will hurry to end the Blight. I will give you a chance, but it will be a slim one. That is the best I can do. And, if the Blight ends, or the Archdemon escapes, you will be expected to fulfil every duty that a Grey Warden has. That will be our bargain.”</p><p><em>This has been the worst trade deal in the history of trade deals, maybe ever</em>. Annie could easily say no and enter the battle on her own terms to approach the Archdemon. Duncan would probably try to kill her before she did, but if she were untouchable, that would be his problem. But what if killing the demon herself was the only way to ensure going home? And if she reached the Archdemon and was unable to kill it because she wouldn’t be a Warden (she remembered Flemeth saying that only they could truly kill an Archedmon), she risked nothing happening. If another Warden killed it but the energy wasn’t enough, she would also be completely screwed. Duncan knew that this was her only option and he was taking advantage of it. Damn Theodosians and their manipulation.</p><p>“Deal,” Annie said, rather miserably. She shook Duncan’s hand then followed him back to the bonfire where the others were waiting.</p><p>“About time,” Jory said monotonously. Annie’s cheeks tinged red, and she hoped the firelight disguised it.</p><p>“Now that we have the scrolls, let us focus on the Joining,” said Duncan.</p><p>“You’re letting her join?” Daveth asked incredulously, “She’s a freak, she is!”</p><p>“A useful freak, Daveth,” Aedan snapped, and the archer huffed an annoyed sigh. Annie narrowed her eyes at Aedan; obviously he only cared for her ability, being pragmatic as always. “Now, will you tell us what this ritual is about?” Aedan asked.</p><p>“I will not lie, we Grey Wardens pay a heavy price to become what we are,” Duncan replied, and Annie cursed herself. If she had waited just five minutes she probably wouldn’t have agreed. “Fate may decree that you pay your price now rather than later.”</p><p>“You’re saying that the ritual can kill us?” Aedan asked for clarification, and Annie cursed herself again.</p><p>“As could any darkspawn you might face in battle. You would not have been chosen, however, if I did not think you had a chance to survive,” Duncan replied. Great. So, Annie would probably die, then, if Duncan had initially refused her recruitment.</p><p>“Let’s go, then. I’m anxious to see this Joining, now,” Daveth interrupted.</p><p>“I agree. Let’s have it done,” Jory added.</p><p>“Then let us begin. Alistair, take them to the old temple.” Duncan ordered the warrior, who nodded, beckoning for them to follow him.</p><p>Annie fell into step next to him, which was rather hard considering the length of his legs, as she wanted to avoid the others. Her stomach rumbled and she remembered that she had barely eaten all day. “Will the Joining involve food? I’m starving.” Annie asked, trying to make the conversation light before her potential death. Alistair laughed.</p><p>“You’re closer to the truth than you think,” he said, and Annie almost stopped dead in her tracks. Would they be eating darkspawn? Disgusted, Annie was about to open her mouth when she remembered Morrigan mentioning vials of darkspawn blood. <em>Oh.</em></p><p>“I thought you were insinuating that we would be eating darkspawn, but I think I now know what those vials of blood are for,” Annie told him.</p><p>“Eating darkspawn? Maker, no. And yes, though I won’t ask how you know about the blood. It’s a good thing we picked up extra vials,” Alistair pulled a disgusted face at the thought of eating darkspawn.</p><p>“Extra vials? I would only need one, I’m assuming, so are you eager for seconds?”</p><p>Alistair laughed again. “Ah yes, darkspawn blood is an acquired taste, only for those with the most advanced palates. It’s a delicacy, I hear.”</p><p>Annie giggled then abruptly stopped when she remembered that Morrigan could be eavesdropping. They went up a stone slope to some ruins which were indistinguishable from the rest of Ostagar. Alistair led them inside, coming to a slow stop. They gathered together, though too far apart to suggest any sort of friendship. Annie shifted her weight from foot to foot as Aedan joined them.</p><p>“The more I hear about this Joining, the less I like it,” said Jory, and Annie was inclined to agree.</p><p>"Are you blubbering again?” Daveth asked mockingly. It was rather rich of him to say, he had almost pissed himself when Morrigan had spoken to him.</p><p>“Why all these damned tests? Have I not earned my place?” Jory snapped.</p><p> “Maybe it’s tradition, maybe they’re just trying to annoy you,” the archer said with a shrug.</p><p>“I don’t like this anymore than you do,” Aedan said quietly, grey eyes scanning the ruins.</p><p>“I only know that my wife is in Highever with a child on the way. If they had warned me… it just doesn’t seem fair.” Jory tried to explain, but he trailed off.</p><p>“Would you have come if they’d warned you? Maybe that’s why they don’t. The Wardens do what they must, right?” Daveth reasoned.</p><p>“Including sacrificing us?” Jory argued. Annie’s headache was getting worse.</p><p>“I’d sacrifice a lot more if I knew it would end the Blight,” Daveth shot back. Annoying as he was with women, Annie conceded that Daveth’s heart was in the right place. She wasn’t sure she could say the same for herself; other than Morrigan and Flemeth, she was not attached to anyone in Thedas. If she could get home without involving herself in stopping the Blight, she would leap at the opportunity without any thought.</p><p>“You make a good point,” Aedan said through gritted teeth.</p><p>“You saw those darkspawn, Ser Knight. Wouldn’t you die to protect your pretty wife from them?” Daveth appealed to Jory.</p><p>“I-”</p><p>“Maybe you’ll die, maybe we’ll all die. If nobody stops the darkspawn, we’ll all die, for sure.”</p><p>“I’ve just never faced a foe I could not engage with my blade,” said Jory. Annie had never faced a foe witch which she could not engage in dialogue. The biggest foe she had ever faced was A-Level exams.</p><p>“At last we come to the Joining.” Duncan’s still voice cut through the night, and Annie jumped. “The Grey Wardens were founded during the first Blight, when humanity stood on the verge of annihilation. So it was that the first Grey Wardens drank of darkspawn blood and mastered their taint.”</p><p>Annie caught Alistair’s eye and cocked her head. Alistair pretended to clap for her and she looked away quickly, not wanting to ruin Duncan’s moment with laughter.</p><p>“We’re… going to drink the blood of those… those creatures?” Jory asked, and Annie rolled her eyes. What did he think the blood was for?</p><p>“As the first Grey Wardens did before us, as we did before you. This is the source of our power and our victory.” Duncan replied. <em>Ah</em>. That was how Alistair had known darkspawn were nearby.</p><p>“Those who survive the Joining become immune to the taint. We can sense it in the darkspawn and use it to slay the Archdemon.” Alistair explained.</p><p>“Let’s get on with it, then,” said Aedan.</p><p>“Not all who drink the blood will survive and those who do are forever changed. This is why the Joining is a secret. It is the price we pay.” Duncan added. Annie’s thoughts turned to Flemeth; surely the old witch must have known about the risks, and had sent her to her death anyway? But if Flemeth had insisted on Annie leaving belongings in the hut, and to not bother with meat for their supper…</p><p>Lost in thought, Annie hadn’t noticed Duncan picking up a silver chalice filled with a dark, viscous liquid. She assumed that it was the darkspawn blood, and she gagged at the thought of having to force it down her throat. It was going to be much worse than a shot of vodka, and Annie could barely keep those down. “We speak only a few words prior to the Joining, but these words have been said since the first. Alistair, if you would?” Duncan asked the warrior.</p><p>Alistair bowed his head before speaking, “Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand, vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that cannot be forsworn…”</p><p>Annie looked up to see Jory nervously glancing at the silver chalice. “…And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day, we shall join you.”</p><p>The urge to cry suddenly overwhelmed Annie; she could be minutes away from death, for all she knew, and they were just standing around! She drew in a shaky breath through her nose and released it through her mouth. To her right, Aedan clasped her shoulder again. Maybe he wasn’t completely heartless. Or maybe he didn’t want her throwing up on his boots.</p><p>“Daveth, step forward.” Duncan ordered. Annie watched as Daveth took the chalice, and she held in a bated breath as the archer drank from it. He swayed, falling to his knees and screaming as he held his head. Annie stumbled backwards and Duncan’s head shot up, his hand almost coming up to rest on the pommel of his dagger.</p><p>Daveth’s screaming rattled through her head. Her knees felt weak and she almost collapsed with him, but Aedan caught her round the waist and pulled her to his side. He was shaking, too.</p><p>“Maker’s breath!” she heard Jory exclaim.</p><p>“I am sorry, Daveth.” Duncan said lowly. “Step forward, Jory.”</p><p>Daveth’s screams were still bouncing around Annie’s skull. Jory and Duncan were talking, and the redhead sounded panicked, but it was as though they were speaking another language; she could not recall any of the words had been spoken, until she heard Duncan unsheathe his long dagger, and the two men grappled. Annie felt lightheaded.</p><p>“Stay with me, Annie!” she heard Aedan shout.</p><p>Annie squeezed her eyes tighter as steel ripped through chainmail and Jory groaned amongst the squelching. “I am sorry,” Duncan said, and she heard Jory groan once more and fall to the floor. Duncan said something again, but Annie couldn’t hear him, the metallic scent of fresh blood the only thing she could perceive, and she gagged. Aedan steadied her on her feet before letting go, and she swayed before someone else held onto her.</p><p>Annie cracked an eye open just in time to see Aedan gulp down the blood. He turned his head, their eyes meeting briefly, as Duncan said, “From this moment forth, you are a Grey Warden.”</p><p>Annie’s eyes darted to the bodies on the floor and then the screaming started again, bouncing off the ruins and inside her skull. Was it Daveth again? Jory? Aedan? It became higher-pitched, and wailing, and then Alistair was shushing her.</p><p>Duncan said something to her, but she couldn’t understand. Somebody was still screaming like a banshee. The lip of the chalice was ice cold as it was held to her lips. The blood was viscous and metallic and the most disgusting thing she had ever swallowed- and she had swallowed some nasty things. <em>Weak constitution</em>, she remembered Flemeth telling her, and she hoped that her hunch about the stupid soup was correct. She didn’t want to die. Her hands flailed and gripped at Alistair’s biceps.</p><p>Alistair’s grip on her waist tightened as the liquid burned down her throat and she shuddered. She felt her eyes roll back into her head out of their own accord and flashes of green and black filled her vision, pounding in time with her pre-existing headache. She felt like she was whiting out on a bad crossfade.</p><p>She just about registered Alistair lowering her to the ground and her vision completely whited out and she heard a distant rumbling, then a roar, and whispers of which she could not make any sense. There were flashes of green and black and something appeared that terrified her and made her blood run cold- but she could not recall what it was. Her eyes snapped open and she retched onto the stone ground, narrowly avoiding Alistair’s knee. Apparently, she had a habit of throwing up around him.</p><p>“Well, that was quick,” Alistair said in surprise, “did it work?”</p><p>Duncan’s face swam into Annie’s vision and he nodded. “I can sense the taint. Her constitution was stronger than I thought.”</p><p>Alistair held a waterskin to Annie’s lips and she drank huge gulps, eager to rid her mouth of the disgusting taste of blood, and to soothe her ruined throat. She looked to her right at Aedan’s still body on the ground, her mouth opening to ask if he was okay, but Duncan beat her to it. “He will be fine,” he reassured her. Annie nodded and closed her heavy eyes, too tired to muster a verbal reply.</p><p>Alistair lifted her head to put her rucksack beneath her neck. Something poked painfully into the base of her skull. Screams rebounded in her brain. Tears were trickling down her face. Somebody wiped them away with their thumbs. Beside her, Aedan stirred with a groan, and she felt Alistair move some of her hair behind her ear before moving to tend to him.</p><p>They were speaking in low murmurs again, but all Annie could hear was a ringing in her ears.</p><p>“Two more deaths. In my Joining, only one of us died, but it was… horrible,” Alistair said sadly, as reality began to creep in again. A breeze rushed over Annie’s skin, blowing away the smell of blood for a few blissful seconds. “I’m glad that you two made it through, though.”</p><p>“How do you feel?” Duncan asked Aedan.</p><p>“Like I’ve been trampled by a bronto,” she heard Aedan grumble. They then talked of dreams but Annie couldn’t follow the conversation. The metallic taste of blood lingered in her mouth and nostrils and she coughed. Something cold and circular was pressed into her hand. Footsteps disturbed the ground beside her, and Annie opened an eye to see Alistair staring down at her with a smile.</p><p>“Sorry about that. I forget how… traumatic, the Joining can be,” he said quietly, “and though I hate to awaken a sleeping princess, I think a bedroll by a fire rather than a cold, hard floor by corpses would be more agreeable, my lady,” he said, offering a hand to pull her up. Annie wasn’t sure if she could stand. She grasped his hand with shaky fingers and her vision went black at the edges, but he was strong enough to haul her up without complaints.</p><p>Her breathing was shaky and her voice was quiet. “Thanks for holding me up back there,” she said hoarsely, feeling faint. Her chest felt light and her heart pounded in her ears.</p><p>“Any time, Annie," Alistair replied with a smile, his honey-coloured eyes reflecting the orange flames of the torches. Annie allowed him to hold her steady, and he gently turned her away from the corpses, her eyes falling on the sprawling camp before them. The night sky was as black as an abyss and it yawned above them, with thousands of stars piercing the nothingness with their white light. The smell of fresh blood lingered in the cool air.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. ostagar</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>tw: gore</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Can you walk? Or would you prefer to be carried, my lady?” Alistair asked playfully.</p>
<p>“What?” Annie asked, shaking her head. Her ears were still ringing, like she had been at a concert.</p>
<p>“Ah, allow me,” Alistair looped his arm around her back, gently steering her away from the ruins. Her boots felt heavy, as if there was chewing gum stuck to the sole, and she looked down to see the pool of dark red blood had grown to surround their feet. She felt herself feel faint again and Alistair grasped her shoulder. He passed her some more water and she rinsed out her mouth spat it onto the floor.</p>
<p>Every tent looked the same; beige canvas, tattered, and sad. Her boots stuck to patches of grass they passed over along the way. Alistair sat her down at a fire, its warmth oddly irritating to her sweat-soaked skin.</p>
<p>A huge man in massive silver armour sauntered past them and nodded. He had an extremely bushy beard and a scar ran from his left eyebrow, taking a chunk out of his broken nose, before ending at the right corner of his mouth. Alistair nodded back in acknowledgement and Annie smiled nervously, not quite sure what to do. The man grinned and shouted; “Looks like you’re not the pretty one, anymore, bastard!”</p>
<p>Annie looked up at Alistair in disbelief, but he only blushed and laughed, calling back; “Well it wouldn’t have been you, Gregor!”</p>
<p>The man guffawed with laughter. Annie raised an eyebrow at Alistair he sat down opposite her, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s true; I am a bastard,” he said quietly, waiting for Annie to say something. She didn’t know what to say back.</p>
<p>“Well, he’s right that you are the only female warden here, I suppose…” Alistair replied, then quickly blushed and stuttered. “Not that you’re ugly or anything! Oh Maker, that’s not what I meant…” Alistair suddenly found his boots very interesting. “Once I have a bar of soap and armour that fits me properly, hopefully I can retake my crown!” he continued jovially, “Though I think you have the edge, being able to avoid blood and mud.” As if to emphasise his point, he scraped off some dried blood from his armour with his fingernail, and Annie pulled a face. Alistair handed her some brown grainy bread (Annie tried to forget the blood under his nails), and he investigated the pot left over the fire, smelling whatever was inside, then frowned. “Did you say you didn’t eat meat?’</p>
<p>“Yeah,” Annie said quietly. The thought of meat brought images of pools of blood and she tasted metal in her mouth again-</p>
<p>“Oh, I’ll find something else then! Not to worry!” he panicked, and Annie knew that he had seen the tears brim in her eyes and she ducked her head, ashamed. She accepted some hard cheese from the warrior and he even asked other Wardens if there was any meat-free food about. Annie watched as he returned with a bowl of some soup made from root vegetables. “Usually we give this to the injured,” he explained. Annie nodded. Injured was one way of putting it. “To be honest I’m surprised you had anything left in your stomach at the Joining,” he said playfully, but Annie gave no reply. He then took up his place by the fire again, serving himself some of the meaty stew left in the pot.</p>
<p>Annie wiggled her toes in her boots, feeling the muscles tense. Her legs felt like lead. The broth was tasteless. Around them, the camp began to buzz again, soldiers awakening from naps and post-meal laziness. The battle would start in an hour, Alistair told her. Annie watched as he wiped down and sharpened his sword. She twiddled Flemeth’s dagger in her hands; it was small, sharp, light, and had flowers carved into the handle. Alistair looked up at her and smirked. “I didn’t realise sewing needles were standard issue,” he quipped, and Annie scowled at him.</p>
<p>“You’re just jealous that I don’t need to carry a heavy sword and shield around,” she said darkly.</p>
<p>“Oh yes, I am so jealous of your fainting and vomiting,” he shot back, a smile brightening his face that wrinkled the corners of his eyes. Annie rolled her eyes, reminding herself that he was just playing with her. She had to admire his effort to lighten the mood when two men had just been murdered. Other than the man from London, she had never seen any humans die right in front of her, and she thought <em>she</em> had been numbed to death, what with barely blinking at the death and destruction on TV news networks.</p>
<p>“Remind me of what you said when you get stabbed by a darkspawn. I hope you’ll enjoy this delicious vegetable soup then,” she said lowly, catching onto his game.</p>
<p>Alistair laughed loudly, drawing the attention of the Wardens who were leaving their tents, and it reverberated around her skull, drowning out the ringing. “I’ve had it before. Many times. And I wouldn’t call it delicious,” he bantered.</p>
<p>Annie rolled her eyes again, but she looked down at her bowl of soup to hide her smile from him. She didn’t like being outcharmed, but it was almost… soothing, to be around Alistair, after a month of feeling so alone, and after such… trauma. If she had been alone, she probably would have crawled into a tent and cried until the battle.</p>
<p>Soon after Annie and Alistair had finished their meals, Aedan found them, and he sat down with a heavy sigh. “Everything hurts,” he mumbled. Alistair passed him a bowl of stew, some bread, and one of those red potions. Alistair opened his mouth to say something but quickly shut his mouth when Aedan tore into his meal like he had been starved for a week. Annie eyed his cool demeanour; he seemed relatively unbothered by the whole situation, though if she had witnessed her family’s murders, perhaps she would have been the same. Duncan then appeared, and he spoke in hushed tones with other more senior Wardens.</p>
<p>“Nervous?” Aedan asked Annie and Alistair. Annie considered her answer, her mind darting between images of a pools of blood, her parent’s smiles as they opened the front door to their house, and pots of vegetable soup. She was unsure of how she felt.</p>
<p>Alistair beat her to answering him. “I’ve never been in a pitched battle before, but it can’t be too different to a skirmish, can it? It’s just… bigger, with more tactics. And arrows. And dogs. And darkspawn…” Alistair trailed off, realising that it was in fact very different to a skirmish. Aedan shrugged.</p>
<p>“Nor I,” Aedan said round a mouthful of bread, “Fergus had trained as a warrior to fight in battles, taking after our father. I was always the better rogue, like mother.”</p>
<p>He stared into the fire, the orange light reflecting in the whites of his eyes. Silence befell the trio, and Annie wondered if Alistair felt similarly unequipped at comforting Aedan. Attempts at lightening the mood with talk of vomit and soup seemed inappropriate, considering Aedan’s circumstances. “I’m sure that the king will ensure justice after the battle,” Alistair offered simply. Aedan did not reply. Before Annie could think of something to say to fill the awkward silence, Duncan appeared by their fire. Alistair leapt to his feet.</p>
<p>“Aedan and Alistair will go to the Tower of Ishal and ensure the beacon is lit,” Duncan explained, and Alistair frowned.</p>
<p>“What? I won’t be in the battle?” the warrior asked, annoyed. Aedan remained unbothered.</p>
<p>“This is by the king’s personal request, Alistair. If the beacon is not lit, Teryn Loghain’s men won’t know when to charge.”</p>
<p>“So, he needs two Grey Wardens standing up there, holding the torch, just in case, right?” Alistair asked sarcastically. Although Annie couldn’t understand Alistair’s desire to fight in the battle, she supposed it was rather over-the-top to need two Grey Wardens when there were so few in the first place.  </p>
<p>“I’m not complaining about avoiding the main battle,” Aedan said with a shrug, idly running a thumb down his dagger. Pragmatic as always.</p>
<p>“I get it, I get it. Just so you know, if the king ever asks me to put on a dress and dance the Remigold, I’m drawing the line. Darkspawn or no.” Alistair said, rolling his eyes.</p>
<p>“Way to take a stand, Alistair,” Aedan sniggered.</p>
<p>“I have my dignity. Well, some.”</p>
<p>“Hmmm,” Duncan said with narrowed eyes. Alistair rarely took things seriously, by the looks of it. “The tower is on the other side of the gorge from the king’s camp, the way we came when we arrived. You’ll need to cross the gorge and head through the gate and up to the tower entrance. From the top, you’ll overlook the entire valley.”</p>
<p>“And when do we light the beacon?” Aedan asked.</p>
<p>“We will signal you when the time is right. Alistair will know what to look for.” Duncan answered.</p>
<p>“Can we join the battle afterwards?” Alistair asked.</p>
<p>“Stay with the Teryn’s men and guard the tower. If you are needed, we will send word.”</p>
<p>“What if the Archdemon appears?” Aedan asked. <em>I get too close for comfort, </em>Annie thought to herself.</p>
<p>“We soil our drawers, that’s what,” Alistair drawled, and Annie held her dagger tighter. Her ‘sewing needle’ probably wouldn’t do the trick, then.</p>
<p>“If it does…” Duncan started, and his dark eyes briefly glanced over at Annie, “Leave it to us. I want no heroics from either of you.”</p>
<p>“I know what I have to do,” said Aedan. He stood up and brushed his leathers down. Alistair frowned and glanced at Annie.</p>
<p>“What about Annie?” he asked Duncan.</p>
<p>Her skin prickled as the three men looked at her. Annie swallowed thickly. She didn’t want to think about Alistair’s reaction to her being in the battle instead of him.</p>
<p>“Annie will join me. Although she is less experienced in combat, her ability will be useful and protect her from harm. I will send her to you if necessary,” Duncan answered diplomatically. Aedan raised an eyebrow and Alistair scowled. Annie conceded that she wasn’t exactly the fighter-type, and she swallowed again, fearing that the lie was beginning to unravel. <em>I just need a few more hours, </em>she prayed. At this point, with thoughts of vegetable soup and Nikes locked in chests floating around her head, Annie wondered if it was even worth it to fight in the battle. She hoped that her gut feeling was wrong and that Flemeth and Morrigan just fancied carrot soup as a change from their usual hare stew.</p>
<p>“Can’t Annie take my place, and I take hers?” Alistair asked. Annie looked over at Duncan, hoping that the man would hold up his end of the bargain.</p>
<p>“I am sorry, Alistair, but Annie’s gift is too useful to keep her off the battlefield. I think we all wish that it weren’t the case.”</p>
<p>Annie nodded without looking up. This was for her family. It was for her friends. It was for indoor plumbing and spicy food and public transport. This was for herself, not for Ferelden. She would run head-first into the battle if it meant she could go home. “Remember: you are all Grey Wardens. I expect you to be worthy of that title.” Duncan told them. Annie nodded again, though she could not say that she truly cared for Ferelden’s fate.</p>
<p>“Duncan…” Alistair started, “may the Maker watch over you.”</p>
<p>“May He watch over us all,” Duncan replied. He crossed his arms and bowed, Alistair and Aedan doing the same, before he looked over at Annie. He was waiting for her to follow.</p>
<p>“Uhm, thanks guys. For looking after me in the Wilds. I’ll see you on the other side,” she said quietly, and Aedan and Alistair smiled at her.</p>
<p>“Take care of yourself, Annie,” Alistair said with an awkward nod. As Annie began to follow Duncan on slightly shaky legs, Aedan called out to her again:</p>
<p>“If we’re just lighting a beacon, I can take your pack!”</p>
<p>Annie froze in her tracks, cringing at how she was delaying Duncan. The man remained impassive though, taking the time to beckon over another older Warden. Annie pondered her options: inevitably lose her pack in the battle, or hand it over to Aedan and risk him seeing all her Earth items. Plus, if she managed to go home, she would never see her phone again.</p>
<p>While she had been thinking, Aedan had jogged over to them, a small smile on his face. Annie smiled at him and handed it over, her fingers lingering on the straps. If she did manage to get home, she would have no phone to call a taxi, but, with any luck, she wouldn’t have to face difficult questions from the noble Warden. At least he could get some use out of her lip balm. Maybe everything in the pack would end up in some Thedosian museum.</p>
<p>Aedan smiled as he pulled the pack over his shoulders and adjusted the straps. Annie thanked him, praying that he would not look inside until she left. She felt Duncan grasp her shoulder and gently pull her away from Aedan. As she looked back at her companions, they had already turned their backs.</p>
<hr/>
<p>Duncan had managed to procure some leather armour and he helped her into the chestpiece, skirt and arm guard things. He gave her one of his own knives, a thing smaller than her own dagger, and she strapped it to her thigh. He was a quiet man, and when he spoke it was calculated and measured. It was poetic, even.</p>
<p>The camp grew quieter and quieter as midnight drew nearer, with the cacophony of war hounds and the clanging of armour and shouts growing in the valley. Duncan led the group of Wardens down into the valley, the thick mud worn down by thousands of boots. Annie kept to his side, eager to avoid interacting with the rest of the order, whose names she wasn’t even aware of. They were older, haggard, scarred, and intimidating; this was not the first battle many of them had faced.</p>
<p>An elven mage was the only one who had smiled at her; she could not place his age, but he had brown hair pulled back to expose his pointed ears, and his eyes were large and green. He wore silver and blue robes and carried a wooden staff much like the one Morrigan used. As Annie stumbled down the slope, her knees wobbling uncontrollably, he caught her arm and cast a spell which relaxed her muscles and steadied her breathing. She smiled her thanks after recovering from her surprise and he nodded, falling back to chat with another warrior.</p>
<p>It was odd, seeing other sentient species who were like humans but so unlike them at the same time. Elves were shorter than humans, with slim builds and pointed ears. She hadn’t seen a dwarf yet, but she imagined them to be like Gimli from the Lord of the Rings. Human men filled most of the ranks, however, with pale, indistinguishable faces.</p>
<p>When they reached the bottom of the slope, Annie drew in a sharp breath at the sight of thousands of men and women lined up in neat rows. It was eerily quiet; there was a low murmur of orders being issued, blessings from the Chantry sisters, and the panting of the war hounds, but the soldiers were otherwise silent. Fear hung in the air like a cloud, and Annie’s mouth went suddenly dry.</p>
<p>Lightning flashed over the Tower of Ishal and Annie jumped. Electricity crackled in the air and her hair stood on end. Duncan was unfazed, leading the Wardens to the front lines, where a blond man in spotless, opulent golden armour stood. The man turned and flashed a grin at Duncan, his teeth straighter and whiter than those of the other men. The king, Annie supposed. The group drew nearer to him, with some Wardens slinking off to fill gaps in the lines, until only a handful remained with Duncan. The electrical storm raged on, and Annie hoped that it wouldn’t rain.</p>
<p>Duncan bowed before the king and Annie hurried to do the same with the other Wardens. “The plan will work, Your Majesty,” Duncan told the king in a low voice as they started to walk.</p>
<p>“Of course it will,” the king replied, “the Blight ends here.”</p>
<p>At the king’s confident admission, a light drizzle began to pour from the sky. Annie felt tears well up in her eyes and her lower lip wobbled. It was awfully cold, and her knees knocked together. She had left her cloak back in the camp on Duncan’s advice, who had warned that darkspawn might grab it.</p>
<p>Hours seemed to pass as they waited for the darkspawn to show. Annie stared down the dark valley, squinting in the rain to make out the mass of shapes at the end. The weight in her chest suddenly lurched forward, her blood feeling like it was about to leap out of her veins, and as she tried to catch her breath which ghosted in front of her, a Warden next to her hummed in sympathy.</p>
<p>“Piss poor luck to be recruited in a Blight,” he grumbled. Annie shivered. The motion sickness must have been her taint reacting to the darkspawn. Annie strained her eyes to focus on the treeline in front of the orange glow of distant torches, and a bitter taste flooded her mouth as she saw shapes of darkspawn emerge in a grey mist. They stalked forward with little formation, only aware of the army ahead.</p>
<p><em>They can’t hurt me. They can’t hurt me. They can’t hurt me. </em>Annie chanted in her head, squeezing her eyes shut. <em>This is to get home. This is for mum and dad. This is for me.</em></p>
<p>She heard swords being unsheathed around her. The darkspawn hooted and shouted as they banged weapons together. The sound grated on her ears and Annie pulled a face; she still had the ringing in her ears from the Joining. Annie glanced to the side, seeing Duncan and the king’s mildly surprised faces, and she almost chucked her guts up on the grass. <em>They didn’t think there would be so many. </em></p>
<p>Annie turned her head, her eyes trailing over men with wide eyes whose chests heaved with fear. Even she could tell that they were vastly outnumbered. She tilted her head to look at the dark tower above them, suddenly envious of Aedan and Alistair. She jumped when somebody grabbed her arm, though it was only Duncan, who beckoned for her to follow him. They slinked through ranks of soldiers until they found the treeline.</p>
<p>“As rogues, we work better from the shadows,” Duncan explained, and Annie nodded. Being less exposed made her breathing just a bit steadier.</p>
<p>A sudden rumble made Annie whip back around to see that the darkspawn had lurched into a sprint. Her knees half-buckled before she mustered the strength to steady herself, planting her feet a shoulder-width apart. She gripped the crystal at her neck so tightly that she felt her fingers would snap in half. Was this what war had felt like a thousand years ago?</p>
<p>Soldiers shouted at the top of their lungs and rushed forwards in a wave to crash against the darkspawn further down the valley. Rooted to the spot, Annie met Duncan’s gaze, and he nodded. He unsheathed his daggers and beckoned for her to follow. Annie hurried after him, trying to ignore the motion sickness in her belly as she copied his low stance to sneak through the undergrowth. Her back ached in her low stoop like it used to do when she played hockey, but she followed Duncan as best she could, her heart pounding in her chest.</p>
<p>Screams and clangs of metal echoed in the valley and Annie kept her gaze on Duncan’s back, avoiding looking at the main skirmish, but it was impossible to ignore the horrible sounds which carried over the pattering downpour of rain.</p>
<p>Overhead, fireballs soared and crashed into the ruins with loud rumbles, the heat briefly warming Annie’s wet cheeks. Duncan suddenly stopped and Annie walked into his back. His breathing was laboured and when he turned around his eyes were wide. He grasped her shoulders, squeezing so tightly Annie thought he would break bones. “I think it is time you disappear,” he whispered, and Annie nodded. Focusing on shifting took less time than usual, considering the very panic-inducing high-stress situation she had found herself in, but when the world changed colours, she felt some of the tension in her muscles dissipate.</p>
<p>She followed Duncan in somewhat of a zig-zag, the low visibility of the fourth dimension made worse by the dark night, watching as he dispatched rogue darkspawn with his daggers. As a genlock crept behind him whilst he was occupied by a Hurlock with a sword and shield, Annie embedded her dagger into the top of its spinal cord. The creature crumpled to the floor and splashed dark blood onto her boots. Duncan pulled her away from another genlock who screamed at her. She stumbled, stomach churning, before she phased out of the physical world and landed on her knees on what felt like soft grass rather than mud. A Hurlock blade passed through her neck, meeting no resistance. Annie felt herself smile as the Hurlock made a confused noise before another solider sliced its neck open with a sword. The soldier did not notice Annie before he sprinted away, having caught sight of another darkspawn.</p>
<p>It was far nicer to stay in this dimension, without the acrid smell of blood and smoke and rot, without the cold rain, and without a clear view of the bodies that littered the ground. The grass had been churned into mud, which had mixed with black and red blood. Men were screaming and groaning behind her. She could almost pretend that she was somewhere else if she didn’t focus too hard on the distorted screams.</p>
<p>Another genlock stalked in a circle around her, head cocked to the side, and it suddenly lurched forward and swiped down with a dagger. Annie remained unbothered. She wanted to stay like this, sitting on her ass in the middle of the battlefield, until the Archdemon showed. She wished she had brought her phone and earbuds to drown out the screams, which were threatening to rebound in her skull all over again, just as she had almost recovered from the Joining.</p>
<p>The battle raged on, and though she could not see much, distorted shouts of ‘Retreat!’ signalled that the battle was not going well. Tears welled up in Annie’s eyes and she bit her trembling lower lip; whilst she could avoid the darkspawn blades, the other soldiers were not so lucky. Her heart pounded a staccato rhythm in her chest, and she tensed her muscles, steeling her nerves. She glanced around the immediate area: Duncan had vanished. Somebody screamed behind her and she turned on reflex, just in time to see a soldier scramble to hold his intestines in his body before collapsing head-first into the mud. Annie gagged, wanting to throw up, and covered her mouth with her hand. She settled for spitting on the floor, not wanting to waste the vegetable soup.</p>
<p>Unthinking, Annie stumbled towards the trees again, phasing in and out to stab darkspawn in the neck as she went, though picking off a couple of genlocks would not make the slightest dent in the horde. The constant shift between dimensions made her head spin and she collapsed in the valley’s undergrowth, chest heaving with exhaustion. When she could think straight again, she counted her kills: five. Pretty respectable for a rookie, but hardly enough to make some sort of difference, she thought to herself.</p>
<p>Annie’s eyelids began to droop but she fought to stay awake. If she fell asleep and missed the Archdemon, she would never forgive herself. Her limbs felt like lead as she watched more and more darkspawn advance through the valley. The weight in her chest grew heavier and heavier, knowing that the chances of winning this battle were becoming slimmer and slimmer. The Archdemon hadn’t even shown yet.</p>
<p>When she had gathered enough strength to stand, Annie found herself shuffling to the battlefield once more, dagger gripped tightly in her hand. Hundreds, if not thousands, of bodies were strewn in the mud. The Fereldan line had been pushed back to under the bridge. Annie’s head pounded as she began to trudge through the bushes back to where they started. Darkspawn had started to spill into the forest, running wildly through the trees and into the Wilds, no doubt to terrorise the villages on the border. Hoots and howls and screams and shouts pounded in Annie’s ears and reverberated in her skull.</p>
<p>A sudden burst of orange light broke through the treetops and Annie looked up, squinting, as the Tower of Ishal came into focus, a great fire burning at the top. She flattened herself against the walls of the ruins, trying to stay out of sight of the darkspawn, not trusting her ability to meditate amongst the chaos of battle.</p>
<p>She caught sight of golden armour glinting in the light of the beacon. The king and Duncan were encircled by darkspawn, all of them covered in blood. The king beheaded two with his huge greatsword as Duncan sliced at them with his daggers. Annie stepped forward, attempting to reach Duncan’s side and ask him if the Archdemon would show, when suddenly her blood ran cold and the motion sickness returned with a vengeance, making Annie cry out as she fell forward. Cold mud met her face and Annie panicked, phasing out again before a sword plunged into the mud below her stomach. She didn’t bother with killing the darkspawn, rolling onto her front to crawl away to find Duncan.</p>
<p>Annie crawled through the mud, pulling on the strings that made up the dimension, thankful that her muddied clothes could somewhat avoid more dirt. A huge roar rippled through the air, distorted, as if Annie was underwater, and she looked up, flinching as her eyes landed on a gigantic, purple, horned darkspawn that towered over the rest. In its massive hand it grasped the king, who was wide-eyed. Ahead of her, Duncan scrambled to his feet, slipping in the mud. His eyes caught Annie’s barely visible form, and he screamed, “Help him!”</p>
<p>What possessed her to lurch to her feet, Annie didn’t know, but she had barely reached Duncan before the creature flicked its wrist and blood spurted from the king’s neck. Annie froze in her tracks. The creature threw the king to the floor with a sickening crunch.</p>
<p>The creature roared again, at first distant and distorted, before the sound came into focus and sliced through Annie’s eardrums. Drops of rain rolled down her nose. Duncan eased himself off the ground and sprinted, jumping to plunge his daggers into the creature’s chest. Blood poured out of its torso like a fountain, showering Duncan, who collapsed onto the floor, clutching his belly. Annie ran to him, falling to her knees in the mud. “You have to go, Annie,” Duncan interrupted her daze, his voice hoarse, “the Archdemon is not here.”</p>
<p>“What about-”</p>
<p>“I may pay my price now, with my other brothers and sisters, but you must have another chance at ending this Blight. Run as fast as you can. Find Alistair and Aedan,” he said quickly, shaking her shoulders and forcing her to look into his dark eyes. A rivulet of blood was running down his chin from the corner of his mouth.  </p>
<p>“Duncan-”</p>
<p>“Go!” he screamed, getting himself off the floor with a groan, “You will not find your home here!” <em>Home. </em>Panicked, Annie felt herself shift, but not before a barbed arrow grazed her side, ripping the leather and cutting her skin. She cried out, hand flying to the wound. Droplets of blood fell from her body, staining the mud red, and then suddenly the world was red and gold and brown again. Duncan shouted a war cry as she turned to run, and she glanced back to see the Warden advancing towards a group of darkspawn. Beyond him, the dark blob of the horde trickled up the battlefield.</p>
<p>Annie turned her head to look forwards. She would not be able to stomach whatever the darkspawn had in store for the Warden. She streamed past blobs of darkspawn and soldiers and bodies, which dotted the battlefield like rocks. Around her, soldiers were retreating, abandoning those further down the field to their fate.</p>
<p>Soldiers fell around her, whether due to arrows or stray rocks on the muddy floor or exhaustion, but Annie kept her eyes forwards, trained on the yawning blackness of the valley. Her legs burned with exhaustion and nausea rolled in her stomach. She passed under the bridge, and when her eyes fell on the muddy slope that she had traversed only an hour prior, she skidded to a halt. Soldiers were steaming ahead. She could follow them, or she could detour through the camp to find the gates to the Wilds, from which she could try and make her way back to Flemeth’s hut. Although it could be a very long detour, Annie’s sense of direction had never been fantastic, so she sprinted towards the slope.</p>
<p>Her legs burned even more with the uphill path, but Annie gritted her teeth and pushed forwards, adrenalin pumping through her veins. She sensed darkspawn along the ridge’s edge as she reached the top of the slope. Annie rested her hands on her thighs as she bent over to catch her breath, spit dribbling onto the ground. The darkspawn were advancing quickly, though, and with an annoyed grunt, Annie picked up her pace again. It felt worse than running a 5k for the first time.</p>
<p>When she felt she was far enough ahead, she dropped back into reality with a wince. It had taken up far too much energy already, and she needed every single drop of it to get back to the hut. “Fuck,” Annie swore. Her hand drifted to touch her side and her hand came away red. Small groups of darkspawn were running through the camp with crossbows in their hands. Annie shifted again to avoid more arrow induced injuries, but then the world spun until she was staring at the moons on her back. Groaning, Annie rolled to the side, then she painfully got to her feet and began to run again.</p>
<p>She turned a corner, guessing that it was the right gate to the Wilds, before she quite literally ran through a group of soldiers who were engaged in a small skirmish with darkspawn.</p>
<p>“What the-” she heard one of them say, but she kept going until she reached the gate. Annie was about to leave the camp behind when she heard a woman shout:</p>
<p>“Go! Go! I’ll hold them off! Go!”</p>
<p>Annie turned to see some soldiers breaking away from the group to run. The darkspawn closed in on the two remaining soldiers, one of them screaming, “No! I’m not leaving you!”</p>
<p>In her distraction, the world became black and blue, then suddenly the ground shook and Annie was thrown to her feet, the shock fully phasing her back into reality. She groaned as the impact knocked the breath out of her lungs. Her eyes were unfocused and overwhelmed by droplets of rain. A woman was screaming in the distance. Annie managed to pull herself up onto her knees, taking in deep, ragged breaths. Her side burned horribly. She opened her eyes and the two soldiers, one with a greatsword and one with a longsword, were still surrounded by darkspawn, who were clambering to their feet. The darkspawn were genlocks with daggers, not the cleverest nor most dangerous of the horde, but deadly in large numbers. An arrow suddenly lodged itself in the mud at Annie’s feet and she rolled to the side, willing her atoms to shift again.</p>
<p>Quickly, the world became pink and red and a deep, rich brown. Annie got to her feet, swaying with dizziness and gripping the strings that made up the slates in the wooden gate to steady herself. She turned her head to look at the soldiers, who were stepping over darkspawn corpses to block incoming blows. The tall one stumbled and lost their rhythm, and as a genlock dropped into a low crouch to shove its dagger beneath the soldier’s armour, it was suddenly encased in ice and the soldier shattered it with a mighty blow and shout.</p>
<p><em>Morrigan?</em> Annie looked around to see if the witch had made her appearance, but there was no other mage by the gates. Annie’s eyes caught on the other soldier’s sword, which crackled with electricity. <em>A Mage. No, an apostate.</em></p>
<p>Though the duo were capable fighters, more and more darkspawn were streaming through the camp. Annie made to run again, but then a piercing scream sent images of dead soldiers half-buried in mud through her brain like a slideshow of holiday pictures, and she skidded to a halt. Perhaps her uselessness could yet be redeemed. Annie pushed herself off the gate towards the darkspawn, dagger grasped so tightly in her hands that her fingernails dug into her palm. Adrenalin pulsed through her veins as she phased in to slice a genlock’s neck.</p>
<p>“Maker’s breath!” the apostate exclaimed. It was a woman’s voice, Annie registered, before she phased out again to attack another genlock. She slaughtered three more darkspawn before somebody grabbed her hand, which was still holding the dagger embedded in a genlock’s back. Annie looked up to see a woman with short black hair and a red streak splashed across her nose.</p>
<p>“There’s more coming, we have to run!” she shouted, pulling Annie towards the gate, both of them slipping in the mud. The rain was stronger now, pelting down, making the already muddy path even more treacherous. As they ran through the gate, lightning streaking across the sky, a genlock ahead of them raised a crossbow and aimed. The woman, still gripping Annie’s arm, waved her sword and the genlock went flying, as if she had Force thrown him. The genlock landed against a tree trunk with a crunch and it fell to the floor, still.</p>
<p>“Come on!” the male soldier screamed.</p>
<p>The forest floor was a slip-n-slide, broken by tree roots and sheer drops into the overflowing marshes. Annie’s leathers were soaked by rain and mud and weighed down her aching body. Her cheeks burned with the cold and nausea rolled in her stomach. The nausea then lurched to the side, and Annie shouted, “Darkspawn to the right!”</p>
<p>They took a sharp left, running through thorn bushes and low-hanging thin branches that scratched Annie’s face. Tears were running down her face, and Annie hoped that her new nameless companions would mistake them for rain droplets.</p>
<p>The male soldier skidded to a halt, hand flying to the pommel of his sword at the nape of his neck. “Deserters!” Annie heard another man shout, but her vision was obscured by the heavy sheet of rain. Five men emerged from the trees, their armour tinted a sickly green. The woman tightened her grip on Annie’s arm. She was sure to leave bruises.</p>
<p>“And what does that make you? Tourists?” the woman asked brightly. The men stalked forward, hands hovering over their swords.</p>
<p>“Ah, and the abomination Warden, too,” one of them drawled. Annie furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.</p>
<p>“I’m not an abomination,” Annie hissed. The man shrugged.</p>
<p>“Doesn’t matter to me, love.”</p>
<p>“Don’t you think we should be fleeing from the darkspawn instead of killing each other?” the woman asked, raising a dark eyebrow.</p>
<p>“Orders are orders,” the man replied, drawing his sword, “no Grey Wardens left alive.”</p>
<p>Annie stiffened in the woman’s grasp. The warrior who had accompanied them from the gates turned back to look at her, probably calculating whether it would be easier to just hand her over.</p>
<p>“Carver,” the woman hissed, “she stays with us.”</p>
<p>Carver nodded, drawing his greatsword. Rivers of rain ran down the blade, washing away the darkspawn blood. Lightning glinted off the metal. The leader of the green-armoured men tutted, drawing his sword, and the men advanced.</p>
<p>“Duck!” the woman shouted, and Carver dropped to his knees just in time as a fireball burst from the woman’s staff and knocked three of the men to the ground. The sudden burst of light made Annie stumble backwards, white spots dancing in her vision. The men howled in pain, their armour smoking. It hadn’t killed them, but it had given Carver time to dive forwards to plunge his sword through the weak spot under one of their helmets.</p>
<p>The woman cast another spell which paralysed a man in the air, his arms stretched out like he was on an invisible crucifix. Carver pushed his sword under the man’s armour and his guts spilled out like worms onto the earth. Annie looked away, bile rising in her throat. A clash of swords rang through the air, blades scraping against each other like chalk on a blackboard. Annie turned back to see the woman fling a bolt of magic at another man which left him sprawling on his back in the mud. Carver and his adversary had fallen to the floor, swords out of their hands, and they wrestled in the mud like children.</p>
<p>The woman engaged a soldier with her electrified sword. The man’s twin daggers sparked every time they touched her blade, and though he found an opening and dived forward, a purple, iridescent ghostly shield blocked him. Annie thumbed the crystal at her neck and closed her eyes, shifting, until the light changed behind her eyelids. One of the men had switched to a crossbow, and Annie advanced towards him, intending to take it out of his hands or push him to the floor, but her vision was poor and her mind was foggy. The man nocked a bolt, aiming it at the apostate woman.</p>
<p>Annie dived towards the woman in desperation, arms outstretched, hoping that she wouldn’t fall flat on her face in the mud, again. Annie closed her eyes and phased out at the last second, feeling the woman’s sodden leathers under her fingertips, squeezing her shoulders. She heard the woman <em>oof</em> in surprise.</p>
<p>
  <em>Please come with me. Please come with me. Please come with me.</em>
</p>
<p>She felt skin and leather beneath her fingertips and she imagined all the atoms shifting. She felt something else, too, something that buzzed in the woman’s veins. Lyrium, Annie thought in a daze, those blue bottles she had seen Morrigan take with her into the Wilds. The world spun, browns and blacks and greys turning to dark reds and flashes of gold.</p>
<p>Annie landed on top of the woman with a thud. She rolled to the side, still grasping the woman’s shoulder, who spluttered at the impact. The woman blinked, her brown eyes rolling back into her head, and she opened her mouth to groan, but no sound came out.</p>
<p>A headache prodded at Annie’s skull and warm blood trickled from her nostril. The world spun again and red became black. Water rushed into Annie’s clothes and she shivered. Beside her, the woman groaned and retched onto the ground. A yard or so away, something squelched and a man screamed.</p>
<p>“Maker’s breath,” the woman mumbled. Annie eased her eyes open, though it was pitch black and it hardly made a difference. “Nice party trick,” the woman told her.</p>
<p>“Thanks,” Annie murmured. Everything was hurting. Carver fell to his knees, panting. Rain kept rushing from the sky and Annie hoped it would wash away the mud layered over her clothes. It was cold and smelly and wet but lying down in the mud was almost soothing. She wanted to stay there forever.</p>
<p>“We should go before the darkspawn get here,” the woman announced. Annie groaned. The woman picked up her staff and the crystal at the end began to glow, its light eerily white. It illuminated the small clearing in the forest and Annie gagged.</p>
<p>The mud was red where the corpses had fallen. The closest one to her had a crossbow bolt sticking out of its neck, presumably having been hit when the bolt passed through Annie and the woman without resistance. Annie, Carver and the apostate were covered head to toe in brown mud.</p>
<p>“So, abomination… Warden…” the woman panted, standing up, “have a name?”</p>
<p>She held out a muddy hand. It took all of Annie’s strength to raise her arm and clasp it. “Annie,” she said.</p>
<p>The woman pulled her up and smiled. Her hair was short and brown and was stuck up in strange places by the dirt. Blood was smeared across her nose and her eyes were big and brown. “Marian, pleasure to meet you,” she said with a toothy smile, “but you can call me Hawke.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. the flight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>tw: gore, exhaustion</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Marian… no, Hawke, gently pulled Annie away from the clearing. Carver followed, huffing and puffing. They trudged through the forest for what felt like eternity. Small groups of darkspawn attacked them sporadically. The darkspawn were just as lost in the rain and dark as the Fereldan soldiers, given the deep footprints in the mud which crossed over each other like steps in a ballroom dance.</p><p>Annie blinked back tears as she remembered the taint running through her veins, which was undoubtedly alerting lost groups of darkspawn to their presence. As Carver decapitated the final Hurlock in one of the endless skirmishes, he keeled over, groaning. Hawke rushed over to hush and heal him. Annie watched silently, something in her chest telling her to bolt and leave the soldiers, who had only taken pity on her but had unknowingly condemned themselves to a never-ending chase through the Korcari Wilds. Annie found she could not do so, whether out of fear or selfishness or comradery or all three, and she followed them through the downpour.</p><p>Though they were exhausted, Hawke was a very chatty woman. Annie quickly learned that the duo were siblings and lived in Lothering, the largest village on the Wilds’ border. Hawke was, of course, an apostate, and Carver was an ordinary warrior. Apparently, Hawke didn’t mind blood and mud and rain but hated peas and having her hair brushed. How the conversation had led to that, Annie didn’t know.</p><p>It was sort of rejuvenating, listening to the woman ramble on and on about anything and everything. Everyone else (except maybe Alistair) had been so guarded and closed off. It almost reminded her of home, and the random conversations she would have with her brother and friends. Annie then cried for a very long time next to a big oak tree, Hawke awkwardly rubbing her back and hushing her. Carver had taken the opportunity to sprawl against the tree trunk and doze off for a short while. Although Annie hated crying in front of him (she was an uglier crier, and Carver was very handsome), she couldn’t stop the sobs that racked her body, and only finished when her head pounded from dehydration.</p><p>As the sun started to come up, Annie laughed. So much for that vegetable soup for dinner. Her body felt like it was floating along the forest floor, too far gone beyond the point of discomfort from running around all day and night. It had been the longest day of Annie’s life.</p><p>“And that’s when me and Bethany woke up, scared shitless, and our necks snapped backwards because somebody had nailed our braids to the bed-”</p><p>Annie’s stomach lurched to the side, interrupting Hawke’s story. “Darkspawn,” Annie hissed. Hawke nodded and gulped down a small bottle of lyrium from her belt, then she promptly threw it at a genlock’s head, and it shattered against its skull. Hawke hooted with glee.</p><p>Annie stayed behind Hawke and her barrier spells, far too exhausted to shift, and watched as the siblings made quick work of the darkspawn. She was almost beginning to yawn when her blood ran cold and an anxiety bubble rose in her chest. Annie glanced up a hill, the light of the sun just beginning to peak over it, where a genlock stood. In its hands was a staff.</p><p>“Emissary!” Annie yelled.</p><p>“Fuck!” Carver shouted through gritted teeth. The emissary raised its staff and brought it down, inciting an earthquake which threw them to the floor. Hawke groaned and cast her own spell, trapping the emissary in ice, but the respite was brief. Darkspawn scrambled to their feet again and launched another assault.</p><p>Annie shifted, biting back the metallic tang in her mouth. She took out one genlock, then another, who were so oblivious to her attack that if she’d had a second dagger, she could’ve slashed their throats at the same time. She physically had to dodge a slash from a Hurlock and she fell backwards, landing on her back again, and she bit her tongue painfully. Metallic blood flooded her mouth as the Hurlock raised its arms, but a sword tip suddenly exploded through its chest and black blood rained down on Annie in a shower. She spluttered, the foul taste reminding her of the Joining. Had that been only last night?</p><p>Annie sat up, trying to focus her eyes on Hawke, who had run up the hill to engage the Emissary. Carver decapitated the final genlock and fell to his knees. Annie panted, not finding the energy to stand up and help Hawke. Her whole body ached. The apostate was groaning as she deflected spells with her ghostly shield, and she trudged towards the emissary like she was about to collapse at any second, but she managed to stab it through the chest with her magical sword. She collapsed with it, exhausted.</p><p>It had stopped raining a few hours earlier, but the mud was still wet and thick. “Only a few minutes…” she heard Hawke call out weakly, “I’ll close my eyes for only a few minutes.”</p><p>Annie smiled, feeling sleep overtake her quickly. Sunlight ghosted over her face and it felt so warm compared to the mud and blood and rain. Annie jerked awake when Carver pulled her off the ground. “We have to… keep moving…” he said through gritted teeth.</p><p>“Do we?” Annie murmured, “I feel like I’m going to fall through the planet’s crust.”</p><p>“We have to warn our family,” Carver explained, “Marian! Get your arse off the ground!”</p><p>“Ugh!” the apostate groaned, cracking her neck. “Which way?”</p><p>Carver was the only one with a sense of direction, so he dragged himself up the hill and glanced around. “That way,” he pointed, “that’s north, anyways.”</p><p>The siblings slid down the muddy hill and Carver led them north, towards Lothering, where their mother and sister were waiting. Hawke assured Annie that wherever they went, she could follow. With no other options left, Annie supposed she would have no other choice.</p><hr/><p>It only took another hour before Annie collapsed. She awoke to Hawke hovering above her face, eyebrows drawn into a frown. “Dehydration,” the apostate said simply. Annie’s eyelids fluttered shut again; though during their flight she had filled her waterskin with rainwater, it had quickly become empty again as the sun rose. Hawke tipped some of her own water into Annie’s mouth, and she drank eagerly. “I think we need a rest,” Hawke mumbled. Annie heard her flop onto the dirty grass beside her, sighing.</p><p>Although Annie’s limbs were as heavy as bricks, her chest felt strangely light, as if she was about to take an exam. She was uncomfortably aware of her own heart thumping in her chest, faster and louder than it usually should be. Her lips felt try and she licked them. “I’ve never seen people die like that,” she murmured to Hawke.</p><p>“Me neither,” Hawke replied.</p><p>The usually chatty woman gave no further comment, and Carver remained silent. Hearing Jory and Daveth die had been bad enough, but <em>seeing</em> men and women being disembowelled and decapitated had been even worse. A sob threatened to wrack her body and Annie squeezed her eyes shut even tighter.</p><p>“I can hear your thoughts,” Hawke drawled, “they’re very loud. How do you fall asleep?”</p><p>“Usually with great difficulty,” Annie replied through gritted teeth, but then she yawned, betraying her exhaustion. For the first time in years, Annie fell asleep within minutes.</p><hr/><p>The next day was long and tiring. Annie was suffering from the worst headache she had ever had the displeasure of experiencing, and she chewed on elfroot for hours on end, both to alleviate the pounding in her temples and the painful emptiness in her stomach. Hawke and Carver were seasoned gatherers; berries and roots gave them small bursts of energy throughout the day, but the lack of grains meant that their stomachs grumbled loudly with every step. Hawke had asked Annie if she was any good at hunting, and the eyebrow raise with which Annie answered made Hawke snort a laugh.</p><p>Thoughts of grilled chicken infiltrated Annie’s mind for the first time in years and she shook her head to will them away, her mouth salivating. They encountered fewer darkspawn as time went on, and Carver theorized that they were returning to the horde to launch a more co-ordinated, devastating attack. They had already wiped out most of the Fereldan army and Grey Wardens and were perhaps biding their time in a bit of psychological warfare. Good news in the short-term, but did not bode well for the future, Annie thought.</p><p>The trio gathered in a tight circle as Hawke filled an empty potion bottle with dirty water from the swamp, boiling it with her magic, and then skimming the dirt off the top with a small metal spoon. They took turns drinking and waiting for Hawke to boil another batch. Annie gagged when she felt the still gritty water slide down her throat, but she was so thirsty she gulped down another bottle. They refilled their waterskins with the newly boiled water and continued on their way. Annie hoped that she wouldn’t get some sort of disease, pessimistic about her vaccinations holding up to whatever medieval viruses and bacteria existed in Thedas.</p><p>The second day went by in a flash. Annie could not remember anything that happened that day, other than longing for her lip balm to soothe her cracked lips. She had wrapped her tunic around her head in an attempt to protect her skin from the sun, and Hawke and Carver had laughed themselves silly at her. She had scowled at them and warned them of skin cancer, but they only laughed more, uncaring.</p><p>On the third day, Hawke had managed to throw a hare against a tree trunk with her magic and break its neck. Annie pulled a face, though it was not nearly as bad as what she had seen at Ostagar. The siblings skinned and cleaned the animal and they roasted it over a makeshift spit in the evening. Visually, their dinner was not appealing; they had left the body and legs in one piece, and seeing an animal almost in its entirety rather than in cuts packaged in plastics made Annie feel slightly sick. The smell, however, made Annie’s mouth water. She hadn’t eaten anything but berries and roots for the past two days. As Hawke handed some of the meat to her, she at first refused.</p><p>“I don’t eat meat,” she said simply.</p><p>“What? How can you not eat meat?” Hawke asked. The apostate then shrugged. “All the more for me, then.”</p><p>As Annie watched the siblings tear into their meat, Annie’s stomach grumbled. She licked her dry lips against the warmth of the small fire. Hawke looked up, grease dripping down her fingers, and smirked. “Tastes amazing,” she teased. Annie narrowed her eyes. It did smell good, Annie conceded, and she took to fidgeting with the hem of her jumper.</p><p>Annie drew in a shaky breath; with the Archdemon plan out the window for the foreseeable future, it would be easier to just… eat meat. What she needed now was life to be easier- she was sick of everything taking a long time, sick of everyone trying to kill each other or manipulate each other, and she was sick of root vegetables. Years of vegetarianism and veganism down the drain… but Annie supposed that eating sustainably hunted meat for survival was a bit different to eating battery-farmed chicken every day. Plus, everything else from her past life had also gone down the drain, like her plans for university and a career and her friends and her family-</p><p>Annie cleared her throat and blinked tears away. “On second thought, I would like some.”</p><p>Hawke raised an eyebrow and swallowed her mouthful of hare. “What changed your mind?” she asked, shaving off some meat with the cleanest knife they could find (which, coincidentally, had been Duncan’s small knife). It felt strange to take the greasy meat in her bare hands.</p><p>“I never used to eat meat because I didn’t want to cause suffering or death… but I’ve killed so many darkspawn these past few days, I suppose it doesn’t matter anymore,” Annie said quietly, sniffing the meat, “roots and berries are getting kind of boring, too.”</p><p>“Food’s food,” Hawke said with a shrug, “except peas. Blegh.”</p><p>Annie hesitated before biting into the meat. Grease trickled down her fingers as the flesh tore away, and she sucked it into her mouth, wincing at the chewier, stringier texture after years of abstinence. It didn’t taste bad, per se, but it was definitely a grim culinary experience. Annie swallowed and looked up at Hawke and Carver, who were watching expectantly.</p><p>“Not bad,” Annie told them, and they smiled.</p><p>“Where in Thedas do they not eat meat?” Hawke wondered aloud. Her gaze then fell on Annie, anticipating an answer.</p><p>“Highever,” Annie answered without thinking. Aedan and Jory had been from there.</p><p>“Hmmm… you do have that noble Highever look about you… grey eyes, dark hair, pointy nose,” Hawke murmured. Annie raised an eyebrow. She was far too below average-looking to be compared to someone like Aedan. Unfazed, Hawke continued, “We always used to joke that Carver was a baby we had stolen from Highever, hah!”</p><p>Carver shot a dark look at his sister, scowling. Annie kept her silence, nibbling on the hare and wincing as she chewed. Only hours after dinner, stray genlocks jolted Annie awake with a wave of motion sickness. Although they dispatched them easily, Hawke and Carver agreed to keep moving. Annie rubbed her temples with her fingers: another night of running.  </p><hr/><p>A few hours after dawn (and some stomach cramping and nausea from the hare), the Imperial Highway came into view, the ruined stone pillars jutting out of the earth like teeth in a jawbone. Hawke had downed her last lyrium potion to cast one last rejuvenation spell over them, and the weak magic that then warmed Annie from head to toe spurred her on for the final few kilometres.</p><p>“I think I’m gonna slip into a coma,” she mumbled, eyes narrowing in the bright sunlight. She was unused to the sun shining so brightly without the thick canopy of the Wilds, and she wished she had packed her sunglasses.</p><p>“Not much use being unconscious for days when the darkspawn are still coming,” Carver told her. How he had managed to run and hike for so long in that heavy armour, Annie couldn’t fathom.</p><p>Hawke, as chirpy as always, piped up, “Now, now, even darkspawn have to rest their feet!”</p><p>Hawke veered to the left, kneeling in front of a fern-like plant to pull off its leaves. Elfroot, Annie remembered, and Hawke pressed some into Annie’s hand. “Chew this, it might ease some of your aches.” Annie did as she was told. Now no stranger to the herb, she had grown to like its earthy but minty taste; it worked, if slightly, but Annie could think of some other, more fun, plants. Hawke patted her shoulder. “Well, even if someone is out to get the Wardens, I think it’s safe to assume that no one will know who you are.”</p><p>Annie looked down at her mud-caked leathers. There wasn’t a single patch of skin, leather or wool that was not coated in mud and blood. She couldn’t even tell that her leggings had been black. She had tried to wash her face with some water, but it seemed she got splattered by mud and blood only hours after each attempt. “I need a bath,” she moaned. Annie hated being dirty, and she didn’t even want to think about the incoming acne breakouts she could feel forming under her skin.</p><p>“I think we all do,” Carver said lowly. Neither he nor Hawke were faring much better.</p><p>They dragged themselves with heavy feet up the stone ramp which joined onto the straight highway. At the top, Hawke rested her arms on the wall, moaning. “I’m adding running for my life in the rain from darkspawn to the list of things I hate,” she panted. The apostate popped her neck and stretched her arms above her head. “Surely we can rest for a bit here, brother?” she asked, craning her neck towards Carver, who nodded.</p><p>Annie collapsed onto the floor, resting her head on the wall. Hawke and Carver did the same. There were birds faintly singing in the trees, and a rustle of leaves in the soft breeze, almost as if the bloody massacre and torrential rain had not occurred just days south. Exhausted to the bone, Annie fell asleep, her head falling to rest on Hawke’s shoulder. </p><hr/><p>A few hours later, the trio resumed their journey, albeit slowly. Annie’s muscles ached like she had been ripped apart and stitched back together. Annie imagined herself as a stranger on the highway, watching the two soldiers and the Warden stumble along the road; they must have looked like the zombies from The Walking Dead.</p><p>They passed broken wagons and crates which were strewn carelessly along the road. Some of them stunk to high heaven, and Annie shuddered at the thought of their contents. As the hours passed and they neared the village, a group of men in rough armour had gathered at the exit. Hawke’s hand hovered over the pommel of her sword as they drew closer, but the men only whistled lowly as they passed.</p><p>“Poor bastards,” Annie heard one of them say. Tears pricked at her eyelids, but she willed them away.</p><p>Chatter and children’s laughter drifted over the air while they lumbered down the stone slope. There were hundreds of people, all in rough peasant clothing with hollow eyes and dirty faces. Some kids were playing a game of tag in the sunken, muddy field which housed canvas tents and makeshift hospital beds. Carver led them left, past a large building with pink stained-glass windows. Templars were dotted throughout the village and Annie looked cautiously at Hawke, who strutted through the streets like she wasn’t an apostate.</p><p>The first settlement Annie had encountered in Thedas was sad. The wooden cottages and huts looked worse for wear, the old beams sagging and stained in places. The thin stream they crossed over was stagnant and dirty. A lonely mill loomed in the field ahead, perched on a small hill. People were lounging on the floor, coughing and nursing wounds, as others carrying crates of blankets and medicines darted to and fro.</p><p>“Do we have any coin for food?” Hawke asked Carver. They had approached a larger wooden building from which music and chatter escaped through the open windows.  </p><p>“I have a few coppers,” he replied. Annie shook her head; Flemeth and Morrigan had not given her any money, and she hadn’t the stomach to loot corpses.</p><p>“Hmm,” Hawke pressed her lips into a thin line, “I suppose we will have to wait until we reach the farm.”</p><p>At this point, Annie was past the point of hunger, though thirst pricked insistently at the back of her dry throat. They lingered in the yard of the building for a few moments, as if money would materialise in their pockets and they could go inside to fill their empty bellies. Hawke sighed, turning on her heel to leave, and Carver and Annie followed. The door opened behind them, the smell of bread rushing out to curl around Annie’s nostrils and she almost burst into tears.</p><p>“I want to throw myself into that river and die,” Annie spat out, and Hawke laughed.</p><p>“What would have all the running and fighting and crying been for, then?”</p><p>“Annie?” A voice called behind her, and Annie’s blood went cold and she stopped in her tracks. She recognised that voice: enunciated and low. “Annie!” It repeated. Hawke’s hand wrapped around her wrist and Annie willed her legs to turn. They did so slowly, until Annie was squinting at a very shocked and alive Aedan, Alistair, Morrigan, and some redheaded woman.</p><p>The pressure in Annie’s chest suddenly released and she burst like a dam, falling to her knees and out of Hawke’s grasp. Tears trickled from her eyes and her vision went black at the edges. Her heart felt like it was about to explode. Aedan’s eyebrows drew together into a frown and he rushed forwards and wrapped his arms around Annie in an embrace before she keeled over. She fell against him, weak. Somebody smoothed her hair away from her snotty nose. Aedan rested his pointed chin on the top of her head, hushing her. It felt like the world was caving in.</p><p>“Shhh,” he hushed, “we thought you were dead. If I had known…”</p><p>Amongst her hiccupping and sobs, Annie heard a French-accented woman reassuring the Hawke siblings that these two random men were indeed Grey Wardens and meant Annie no harm. Aedan stroked her mud-encrusted hair as far as the knots would allow. They must have been causing a scene in the town, but this was the first hug she’d had in a month, and she hadn’t realised how much she had ached for it. If last night had gone differently, she might have been embraced by her mother. Annie cried harder.</p><p>Hiccupping and sniffling, she slowly pulled away from him, and Aedan smiled at her, wiping away her tears with his calloused thumbs. She blinked away the last of them so that her vision was not so blurred. His smile was sad, and his eyes were glistening with moisture. A tail of one of his eyebrows was missing, like it had been singed off, and a dark bruise mottled his jaw. Aedan got to his feet, holding out his hand for her. He pulled her dead weight up easily. Alistair pulled her into an awkward one-armed hug, apologising.</p><p>“Maker, Annie…” he murmured, “Is… oh, never mind.” He seemed to pick up on her exhaustion and kept his arm around her shoulders, holding her against his armour as she sagged against him. A soft woof drew Annie’s attention to her feet, where Potato circled and eventually sat on her aching toes with a doggy smile.</p><p>“Ow…” Annie winced, but she smiled softly at the dog.</p><p>A cold hand rested against her dirtied cheek. Annie glanced up to meet golden eyes. She had never seen Morrigan so sad.</p><p>“I am sorry, Annie. By the time I had alerted mother to Aedan and Alistair’s whereabouts, I had lost you in the storm… I flew for hours but could not find you in the rain,” the witch said quietly, like she didn’t want the others to hear.</p><p>“I… I…” Annie stuttered, overwhelmed. She was so, so, so tired: tired of running, tired of crying, tired of lying, of the fighting, of the rain, of the shit food. She was tired of fucking Thedas.</p><p>“Let’s get these poor souls something to eat, hm?” the redhead asked softly, a smile on her pretty face, and Annie nodded her head.</p><p>“Finally! I could eat a bronto right now,” Hawke exclaimed, slapping her belly. Carver scowled at his tone-deaf sister.</p><p>Annie’s heart pounded in her chest and she drew in a deep, shaky breath. Her vision began to fizzle out as exhaustion caught up with her. Her head pounded from dehydration, and she fell further into Alistair’s side. His armoured gloves dug into her skin as he held her up, gently steering her to the tavern.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>so i've just moved to egypt for my year abroad ..... updates might be slower because im doing an intensive arabic course lol</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. lothering</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The air inside the tavern was thick and pungent. As Annie and the others stepped over the warped wooden threshold, the tavern’s patrons parted to let them through, staring as they did so. Alistair’s grip around Annie’s waist was the only thing stopping her from falling to the sticky, uneven floor.</p><p>They sat down at a table in the corner and somebody ordered tea and broth, though Annie couldn’t recall who. Patrons argued over the price of bread and traps and elfroot, and a bard plucked at a lute on the upper floor. It was melancholy and slow, and the first Thedosian music that Annie had heard, and it was nice enough, but easily forgettable, and it faded amongst the growing chatter.</p><p>Morrigan wet a cloth and wiped away the worst of the mud and blood on Annie’s face, her touch almost tender, if not awkward. The water was cool against her skin in the stuffy tavern, whose stink and close air made Annie’s eyes stream.</p><p>Beside her, Hawke noisily slurped down some meaty broth. Even though the apostate gave the impression that Ostagar had just been another Tuesday (what with the vulgar jokes and strange topics of conversation), Annie saw that Hawke’s fingers were just as unsteady as hers.</p><p>Aedan stood next to their table with a forced smile, the redhead, called Leliana, next to him. Alistair sat opposite Annie, beside Carver, staring down at some questionable brown stains on the wooden tabletop, and occasionally tracing them with a dirty fingernail.</p><p>Aedan explained the ordeal at Ishal: the overrun tower, Loghain’s betrayal, waking up in Flemeth’s hut, believing they were the only survivors, deciding that they were going to use the old treaties to muster an army to defeat the Blight, blah, blah, blah.</p><p>When he finished, Aedan rested a hand on her shoulder. “I know that’s a lot to take in, Annie. You should rest here until we finish running our errands,” he said quietly. He was using the voice with which you would comfort a child.</p><p>“Thanks,” was all with which she could respond.</p><p>Aedan smiled awkwardly again, patting her shoulder, before he turned to Leliana. “Shall we go sort out the bears, spiders, wolves, bandits, and the Qunari?” he asked brightly. Leliana giggled and nodded. Aedan’s gaze then fell to Morrigan, who was wringing out the dirty cloth in an equally dirty bowl of water. “We’ll need you, Morrigan,” he said.</p><p>Morrigan met his gaze and sighed. “Very well. But we should be quick about it,” she agreed. The witch stood up and adjusted her clothes, then squeezed past Hawke and Annie’s legs to the other side of the table, Hawke checking out her rear not-so-secretly.</p><p>“You should stay here, Alistair. You can rest and keep each other company. We’ll see if this Qunari can join us, and we have Potato here,” Aedan suggested to the warrior, though his tone of voice carried such finality that it seemed more of an instruction. Alistair looked as if he were about to protest, but he only sighed.</p><p>“You’re right… I think my shoulder needs some more time to heal. But I’m uneasy about splitting us wardens up, after that whole… fiasco,” Alistair told him.</p><p><em>Us. Wardens. Fuck. </em>Annie looked down at her tea. Now, she was <em>really </em>regretting allowing herself to be taken advantage of by Duncan. Annoyed as she was, however, Annie couldn’t help the pang in her heart when she thought of the man lying dead in the valley; much like Aedan, he had been pragmatic to the end, and if she had been faced with her homeland’s destruction, she probably would have done much the same. Plus, if she couldn’t get home soon, and the Blight swallowed up Ferelden, she would meet the same fate as the dead soldiers anyway. Annie exhaled a deep breath through her nose. She didn’t have many options.</p><p>“We’ll be fine, Alistair. Try to stay out of trouble,” said Aedan, “Oh, and here’s your pack, Annie. We didn’t feel right selling your belongings, strange as they are…” he said, trailing off. He held out the slightly soiled pack to her, and Annie felt her dry lips crack as they stretched into an involuntary smile. The prospect of crying to some Simon and Garfunkel was very appealing.</p><p>Aedan cleared his throat and Annie met his eyes. “Yes… uhm, perhaps we can… talk, later, when we make camp?” he asked. Annie’s throat went dry but she gave a hasty nod. <em>Fuck. That was worse than a ‘we need to talk’ text.</em></p><p>“And what about you two?” he asked Carver and Hawke. The apostate was midway through chewing her bread, and Carver looked at her expectantly, and she swallowed thickly.</p><p>“Our family lives just outside the village. We need to get there to warn them and get out of here,” Hawke replied, with bits of food stuck in her teeth. She turned to Annie, her brown eyes warm, despite her obvious exhaustion. “You’re welcome to join. Think we’ll head for Gwaren and then onto the Free Marches.”</p><p>“You’re leaving Ferelden?” Alistair asked incredulously, “What about fighting the Blight?”</p><p>“Isn’t that what we were doing three nights ago? I’ve seen it, mate, and I’m not getting my mother or sister involved in that shit show,” Hawke replied. Alistair pursed his lips and made no further comment. It was certainly tempting to leave Ferelden to avoid fighting the Blight, and Hawke seemed nice enough. Annie would even say that she was rather fond of the apostate. She felt… uneasy, at returning to Morrigan and the Wardens’ company, considering they had left her for dead. Hawke and Carver had protected her against Loghain’s men, and they hadn’t even known each other’s names.</p><p>Deep down, however, Annie knew that she only had one chance at getting home, which just so happened to coincide with the only way to end the Blight. Unless Flemeth suddenly materialised with a magic orb to send her back to Earth, Annie conceded that sticking with the Wardens was her best bet.</p><p>Annie heaved another sigh; this was not the gap year she had planned, at all. “Sorry, Hawke, but I’m a Grey Warden now. Besides, I wouldn’t want to put a target on your back,” she said, her mind casting back to Loghain’s men in the Wilds.</p><p>“Aw, and I was starting to grow fond of you,” Hawke said sadly, “hopefully we’ll meet again someday. Look out for the Amells in Kirkwall.”</p><p>“Will do.”</p><p>The Hawke siblings stood up, having finished their meals, and gathered their weapons. Carver nodded at Annie as he left the table and Hawke ruffled the muddy mess of Annie’s hair. “I would say to take care of her, but I think she’s more than capable of doing that herself,” Hawke announced to the others, grinning toothily, “thanks for your help back there.”</p><p>“No worries. I would probably still be wandering the Wilds without you guys.”</p><p>“You’re a strange one, Annie. Disappearing, fainting, crying eating hare…” Hawke wondered aloud, turning to leave. The mud on her leathers crackled with every movement.</p><p>“Says you, Hawke.”</p><p>Hawke guffawed with laughter. “Aye, I’ve heard that before. Take care of yourself, Annie, and may the Maker watch over you, or whatever.”</p><p>“You too.”</p><p>Annie tucked her pack under the table and watched the siblings leave the tavern, her heart strangely heavy.</p><p>“Stick together, we’ll meet at the mill just before sunset,” Aedan ordered. He dug into his tunic pockets, rummaging, until he found a few copper coins and handed them to Alistair. “So Annie can eat something,” he said, smiling brightly, then he turned his back to leave, Potato lumbering after him. Leliana bid them goodbye and Morrigan gave Alistair a pointed look.</p><p>“Look after her,” she said curtly.</p><p>“I’ll do a better job than you,” Alistair replied with a sarcastic smile, and the witch’s nostrils flared, but she managed to school her face back into its usual disdainful default setting.</p><p>“Do try to eat something, Annie. If they do not sell anything suitable, which is rather likely in such an establishment…” Morrigan drawled, her lip curling, “…try to have some bread and I will prepare something for you when we make camp.”</p><p>“Thanks,” Annie said simply. Morrigan’s mouth opened, then closed again, and she nodded, then swept out of the door.</p><p>“Well… two’s company, I suppose,” Alistair said with a sigh. He still looked rather pale, considering his usual golden complexion, and the light from the fire blazing in the fireplace intensified the redness in his hair and cheeks.</p><p>“Still recovering?” Annie asked quietly. Her throat was only just starting to heal from the dehydration of the past few days. Alistair nodded. “Me too,” she sighed.</p><p>“Maker… it was bad enough hearing it, let alone fighting in it. Was it… as bad as I think?” he asked cautiously.</p><p>“Worse. I… can’t describe it. Well, I can, but I’ll either cry or throw up,” Annie replied, shrugging, then she hunched over in her seat, feeling her stomach cramp again. “I ate meat. I was so fucking hungry. I had been eating berries, but I was so hungry I was crying all day. So, I ate a bit of hare Hawke killed. I couldn’t stop throwing up, afterwards. Then darkspawn attacked and we were running again and my stomach was hurting so badly-”</p><p>Annie stopped abruptly. Tears were welling in her eyes and were threatening to fall down her cheeks. Alistair reached across the stained table to lightly clasp her hand in his. The armoured plate and chainmail dug into her hands painfully, but when he gave a gentle squeeze, Annie smiled, letting out a deep breath.</p><p>“Nobody can fault you for surviving, Annie. You seem pretty talented at that,” he said softly.</p><p>Annie looked up, blinking the tears away in the orange light of the tavern, and Alistair smiled widely, his chapped lips lifting to show some of his slightly crooked teeth. “I suppose not. At least the hare had a good life,” Annie said quietly.</p><p>“I’m sure he did, if Morrigan hadn’t terrorised it as a wolf, or bear, or… something,” Alistair mumbled, and Annie gave a small smile. He fell silent again, his eyebrows drawing closer together, and he stared at the bar.</p><p>“Do you want to know about Duncan?” Annie asked him.</p><p>“I did not want to exhaust you,” he replied evenly, “but… it would be… comforting, to have some closure.”</p><p>“I’m not sure I’m the one who can give you that,” Annie said softly, and his lower lip trembled before he drew it into his mouth to chew on.</p><p>She drew in a deep breath and began to describe her last encounter with the warden. She remembered the mud, and how choking it had been; she remembered the rain, and how cold it had been; she also remembered the screams, and how loud and pained they had been. She couldn’t remember what Duncan’s face had looked like, no matter how hard she strained her memory, nor the king nor the bodies on the floor; she only remembered that they had been dead and bleeding. When she recounted how Duncan had told her to run, his face blurry in her mind but his voice as a loud as a bell, Annie let go of her mug and pulled her trembling hands to her lap.</p><p>Alistair was silent. Annie caught the glint of tears in his eyes, and he blinked them away, and he let out a deep breath. “Thank you,” was all he said.  </p><p>He remained uncharacteristically silent as she finished her tea, but then he beckoned the server over to order her another. As she gulped down her second mug, his eyes flickered from the door, to the bar, to the wall, then to the door again, avoiding her gaze.</p><p>Annie looked down at her pack. She thumbed the straps, unbuckled them, and peeked inside, her eyes straining in the low light of the tavern, until she found the tube of lip balm. She pulled it out and uncapped the lid with a pop, inspecting it to make sure it wasn’t too dirty, and ran it along her sore lips. When the faint smell of cherries curled round her nostrils, she almost burst into tears again.</p><p>“I knew it was for lips!” exclaimed Alistair, making Annie jump. “Aedan thought it was perfume. Morrigan wouldn’t tell us anything.”</p><p>“Yeah… it’s good for keeping them moisturized,” Annie confirmed, a little taken aback by his sudden shift in mood. Her heart still pounding, she was just about to replace the lid, when she caught Alistair’s intense focus on the tube, then her eyes drifted to his chapped lips. “Want some?” she asked.</p><p>The warrior’s eyes narrowed, but he slowly nodded. She handed it to him and he rolled the tube between his large, dirtied fingers. “It’s so shiny,” he said. “How do I…?”</p><p>“Twist the end.”</p><p>He did as he was told, slowly, carefully. He sniffed the red balm and raised his eyebrows. “Cherry?”</p><p>“Yep.”</p><p>Alistair ran the balm along his lips and pulled a face. “It’s rather… thick.”</p><p>Annie laughed. “You get used to it. Smack your lips together, like this,” she said, and popped her lips to show him. He did the same, louder, and with more saliva. “Better?”</p><p>Alistair shrugged, handing it back to her. The plastic was warm from his hands. “My lips feel less dry, I suppose.”</p><p>“Then it did its job.”</p><p>“You know… I don’t think me and Aedan have ever been so confused as when we looked in your pack,” said the warrior, “everything felt and looked… strange. Shiny. Light.”</p><p>“Did you look at my underwear?” Annie asked, raising her eyebrow. Alistair’s ears and cheeks tinged bright red.</p><p>“Maaaaybe.”</p><p>“When?”</p><p>“Just before the battle started?” he said, wincing.</p><p>“That soon? Can’t a girl have secrets?” Annie asked, feigning offence.</p><p>“Seems you have quite a lot.”</p><p>“You make a fair point,” Annie mumbled. She gulped down the final dregs of lukewarm tea and sighed again. “I’ll explain everything tonight. Right now, I think I’m still in shock, I’m hungry, I’m aching, I’m tired, and I. Am. Filthy. I know you have reason to distrust me, but I also have reason to distrust you, for snooping through my things and smiting me. If Morrigan had been watching she would have turned you into a frog.”</p><p>“You make a fair point,” Alistair conceded. “Well, living in blissful ignorance is one of my many talents, so how about we stop talking about this and Ostagar and go find somewhere to have a nap?”</p><p>“Weren’t you meant to feed me first?”</p><p>Alistair’s smiling expression froze. “Oops. I think they have some carrot soup, come to think of it…”</p><p>Alistair found a copse of trees to rest under by the stream’s banks, at the edge of the village centre. He explained that they had run into trouble with some of Loghain’s men in the tavern (which was how they had met Leliana), so he thought it best to stay out of sight for a while. Annie trusted his judgement and eased herself onto the damp grass, groaning.</p><p>“After Aedan and the others do the chantry board work, we should have some coin to buy supplies,” Alistair explained. Annie nodded and let herself fall onto her back, closing her eyes against the sun. Her muscles had never ached so badly.</p><p>“I need a bath,” she mumbled. She had never been so filthy.</p><p>“You don’t look too bad,” Alistair said as he settled, his armour clanking. “The smell, however…”</p><p>“Not all of us could be bathed by Flemeth. Some of us were running for our lives for three days straight.”</p><p>“Ouch,” Alistair said through gritted teeth, “I think you win.”</p><p>Annie cracked an eye open and reached for her pack. She pulled out her gloriously clean jumper and draped it over her face, breathing in the faint acidity of the soap Morrigan and Flemeth used. If she couldn’t use SPF here, she was damn well covering up as much as she could.</p><p>The breeze rustled the grass and leaves in the trees, and Annie sighed. It was almost peaceful. Beside her, Alistair fumbled with his armour. “Are you alright?” Annie asked him, her voice muffled.</p><p>“Don’t mind me… just trying… to get… comfortable… ah ha!” A clasp popped open and a buckle jingled. “Sweet dreams, Annie.”</p><p>“Hmm.”</p><p>Annie startled awake when the sun was hanging low in the sky. The wind was colder, and her heart hammered in her chest, as if she had fallen from the sky. “Bad dreams?” Alistair asked. Annie shook her head.</p><p>“Didn’t dream of anything,” she replied. She blinked in the blue light, watching a toad hop onto the banks.</p><p>“Oh, me and Aedan have had terrible dreams, lately. Are you sure you didn’t see a big black dragon with white eyes? Can’t miss it.”</p><p>“Nope.”</p><p>Alistair hummed in curiosity. “I’m jealous,” he said, getting to his feet to re-buckle some of his armour. Annie blushed slightly as she watched his large, calloused hands flick buckles and clasps into place. She looked up at him and he grinned. “Come, let’s find the others.”</p><p>The wind was gusty as they trekked across the small village, carrying the stench of mud. Annie shivered and pulled Alistair’s cloak tighter around her shoulders (he had taken pity on her chattering teeth). When they approached the creaky wooden mill, Aedan and the others rounded the corner, panting. Aedan and Potato were splashed with red blood.</p><p>“Long time no-” Alistair started, then he skidded to a halt with a rather high-pitched, “Oh!”</p><p>Annie’s steps faltered as her eyes landed on the huge man accompanying Aedan. Well, man may not have been the correct term, considering their metallic skin, heavy brow, golden eyes, ridged skull and huge stature. The person only scowled at Alistair, who did nothing but gulp.</p><p>“Alistair and Annie, meet Sten,” Aedan said brightly, though his breathy voice betrayed his exhaustion. Alistair dipped his head, his eyes still narrowed.</p><p>“A pleasure.”</p><p>“Hmm,” was all Sten said.</p><p>Leliana nodded at Annie and Alistair as she passed them, heading towards the bridge to the chantry. A particularly strong gust of wind whipped Alistair’s cloak around Annie’s shoulders, and she shivered. “Are you well?” Morrigan asked.</p><p>“Just tired,” Annie replied.</p><p>“We’ll make camp soon. I’ll meet Leliana outside the chantry to buy supplies, then we’ll go on our way.” Aedan explained, sheathing his long daggers.</p><p>“You’re exhausted, Aedan. I can go,” Alistair said, catching the other Warden’s arm as he passed. Annie caught Aedan’s pained wince.</p><p>“It’s fine, Alistair. I’m fine,” Aedan said with a smile. Alistair sighed, releasing his arm, and Aedan took to follow Leliana.</p><p>Annie raised an eyebrow at Morrigan, who rolled her eyes. Annie eased herself down onto the slope of the grassy mound, pulling Alistair’s cloak tighter around her shoulders. Nobody said a word as they waited for Leliana and Aedan’s return.</p><p>The sun had set when they finally made camp on the outskirts of the village. Some darkspawn had attacked them on the Imperial Highway, but Sten had ripped through them like a hurricane and dispatched them in a terrifyingly short amount of time. It had been like Splash Mountain, except with blood rather than water.</p><p>Morrigan had already stalked off into the undergrowth. Sten was chopping firewood, his huge arms bringing the axe down with such force that Annie feared he would split the Earth like the squirrel in Ice Age. Alistair and Aedan were putting up the two flimsy canvas tents with a lot of cursing and huffing.</p><p>“The last ones left in the village,” Aedan had told them proudly.</p><p>The night was cold and dark and quiet. Aedan clapped his hands when Alistair tugged on the tent’s ropes and it didn’t collapse. Annie looked down at her hands, which were trembling; whether it was because of the cold or the impending ‘talk’ with Aedan, Annie didn’t know. It was probably a mixture of both.</p><p>Sten silently started a fire, and Annie scooted closer to warm herself, but refrained from holding out her hands, as unsteady as they were. Maybe when the others weren’t looking, Annie promised herself.</p><p>The tips of her ears were numb and Annie pulled Leliana’s scarf around her head. Another person who had noticed her weak constitution, Annie thought darkly.</p><p>“Maker, you really feel the cold, don’t you?” Alistair asked. Annie nodded.</p><p>“Ferelden’s f-freezing,” she chattered.</p><p>“Maybe you come from further north, even Tevinter, maybe,” Alistair suggested.</p><p>“Maybe,” Annie replied. Her eyes flickered to Aedan, who was busying himself with sharpening his daggers, but he was undoubtedly eavesdropping. “I’ll have to wait until tomorrow to wash myself. I feel sorry for Leliana,” Annie sighed.</p><p>“I’ve smelt far worse,” Leliana said with a laugh. “Ferelden smells of wet dog, anyways.”</p><p>Sten hummed in agreement, and Annie cocked her head to the side, conceding that Leliana was right, really. Potato barked happily and Annie laughed. “Potato has better comedic timing than Alistair,” Annie quipped, desperate to lighten the somewhat awkward mood, and Aedan and Leliana burst into laughter. Annie felt much warmer.</p><p>“Hey!” Alistair protested, “My jokes are better though… right?”</p><p>“Marginally,” Annie replied, and Alistair laughed.</p><p>Leliana handed a hard slice of bread and crumbly cheese to Annie, and she tore into it hungrily, though her shaking hands threatened to spray the crumbs all over the campfire. At least she could blame it on the cold, however.</p><p>“May we talk?” Aedan asked suddenly, and Annie jumped. Her mouth felt dry.</p><p>“Can we wait until Morrigan gets back?”</p><p>“She might not be back until morning,” Aedan replied somewhat coldly. Annie gulped.</p><p>“I want her to be here. She can help me explain,” Annie pressed. Aedan met her gaze, his grey eyes calculative, before he nodded.</p><p>“Whatever makes you comfortable,” he said happily, though Annie detected the annoyance in his clear, enunciated voice. Alistair coughed awkwardly. Morrigan couldn’t come back soon enough.</p><p>Leliana and Sten had gone to bed by the time the witch returned. She entered the clearing silently, her golden eyes reflecting the low light of the fire like those of a cat, and she held herself straight, eyeing Aedan and Alistair with suspicion. Aedan and Alistair straightened their backs as they looked at her. Caught in the middle, shivering and wrapped in blankets, Annie was trapped in a catfight.</p><p>“Shall we dispense with pointless pleasantries?” Morrigan asked, sitting beside Annie. Aedan smiled.</p><p>“Not the way I was raised, but I appreciate the efficiency,” he replied. Alistair looked uneasily at Annie.</p><p>“Should- should I start from the very beginning?” Annie asked. A headache was beginning to pound at the top of her head. <em>London. Magic orb. Quantum physics. Other universes. Pink crystals. Vegetarianism. Spotify. Polyester.</em></p><p>“Yes,” Aedan replied.</p><p>Annie let out a deep breath. “Well… it’s hard to explain. No, uhm, it’s easy to explain, but hard to understand. As you can tell… I’m not from… here.”</p><p>“Obviously,” Alistair interjected with a scoff. Annie felt her mouth twitch and she flushed red.</p><p>“I mean… not from Ferelden, or… anywhere else in Thedas…” Annie explained, quietly, and unsteadily. Alistair’s hand flew to the pommel of his sword and Morrigan grasped her staff.</p><p>“She does not mean the Fade either, you fool,” the witch hissed. Alistair narrowed his eyes but drew his hand away from his weapon.</p><p>“Then what do you mean?” Aedan questioned, leaning forward. His eyebrows were drawn together, and his mouth hung open, as if he were a child being told a bedtime story.</p><p>“I’m from another world. Another time, another universe, I don’t know,” Annie muttered, staring down at her lap as not to see the undoubtedly puzzled and disbelieving expressions of the wardens. When nobody interrupted, Annie drew in another deep breath and continued.</p><p>“I’m from a city called London, on a planet called Earth. Everything is… different. Thedas, to us, is a thousand years behind. There’s no magic, no elves, no dwarves, no darkspawn, no dragons. Only humans and machines. I was out with some friends when a man smashed a black orb in front of me, and I woke up next to his dead body in the Wilds. Flemeth and Morrigan helped me, and here I am. I joined the Wardens because Flemeth said killing the Archdemon might send me home.”</p><p>An uneasy silence settled on the camp. The fire crackled. Annie’s headache spread its tendrils to behind her eyes and she squeezed them shut. It was as if she had just confessed her sins to a priest in church.</p><p>“I see,” Aedan said simply, and his curt answer almost made Annie laugh.</p><p>“You see? She’s just said she’s from another world!” Alistair hissed loudly, “if she’s not a demon then she’s crazy.”</p><p>“This is what I was afraid of,” Annie mumbled, cradling her head in her hands.</p><p>“Afraid that we wouldn’t believe you? An understandable fear,” Aedan asked, then he laughed, and Annie looked up at him, confused. He smiled and shrugged his shoulders.</p><p>“Your talents, your clothes, your belongings, your diet, your sense of humour, your aversion to mud…” Aedan listed, “… it all makes sense, somehow.”</p><p>“Really?” Alistair asked.</p><p>“Annie speaks the truth,” Morrigan added, and Alistair scoffed.</p><p>“How do you know it’s true?”</p><p>“I trust Morrigan and Flemeth’s judgement. We may butt heads, but they are not foolish. If such powerful and knowledgeable mages judge Annie’s story to be true, then who are we to say otherwise?” Aedan said to his companion, who rolled his eyes.</p><p>“We would be wise to,” Alistair muttered.</p><p>Aedan sighed and turned to Annie. “Does anybody else know?”</p><p>“Only Flemeth and you guys. Duncan did, as well…” she replied quietly.</p><p>“Duncan believed you?” Alistair asked incredulously. Annie steeled her jaw and sat up straighter.</p><p>“Yes. He wouldn’t let me join the Wardens, so I explained everything,” Annie replied as steadily as she could, but her voice was still hoarse, and her lower lip wobbled.</p><p>“Duncan was a good judge of character, wasn’t he, Alistair?” Aedan asked the warrior, and Annie almost laughed again. Manipulation seemed to be the national sport.</p><p>“I suppose,” the warrior answered lowly.</p><p>“Well, that’s it, really. Simply put, I’m stranded with nowhere else to go,” Annie said quickly, the words tumbling out of her mouth as if she were competing in a slam poetry competition. Embarrassingly, no one made to comfort her. The four of them sat in a stifling awkward silence.</p><p>“It is a strange story, I must confess…” Aedan murmured, his grey eyes gazing into the dying fire. Annie winced at her growing headache.</p><p>“To me, everything is strange here. Magic doesn’t exist, as far as I’m concerned, much less something like the Fade. Nobody has used swords for a hundred years or relied on swords for more than five hundred. The food here is shite and I think my teeth are going to fall out with no toothpaste and I’m so cold all the time…” Annie rambled, her voice trailing off, betraying her weakness. Hot tears pricked at her eyes and she dropped her head to her hands, struggling for breath.</p><p>Somebody laid a hand on her shoulder and she sagged into the warm hand. “It is difficult to believe, but more difficult to disbelieve, I think. Naming you a liar will do nothing for us. As long as you are a Warden, and you fulfil your duty, your past life is not important,” she heard Aedan say, and Annie scowled.</p><p>“So you don’t care at all?” she asked bitterly. </p><p>Despite her cold tone, Aedan smiled softly. “Of course I care. I know what it’s like to lose your entire family, and I can sense that your grief is real, Annie,” he replied, and his hand drifted to her chin, which he lifted with his calloused fingers. Annie swallowed the lump in her throat and met his eyes, which were surprisingly tender, and smiley. Annie felt her lower lip wobble. “We’re not so different, you and I,” he said.</p><p>
  <em>I wish I was as strong as you.</em>
</p><p>“Get some rest. We will speak more on the matter in the morning, after you’ve had some sleep,” Aedan instructed. <em>Back to the leader</em>. His hand fell from her chin and Annie dropped her head again, as though her neck had turned to jelly. Morrigan pulled her up, whispering some sort of incantation that warmed the blankets wrapped around her body.</p><p>Annie turned to the side to see Alistair eyeing her warily. He bid a curt goodnight as Morrigan led Annie to the other tent, and Annie clambered inside to lie down beside Leliana. Morrigan closed the tent flap silently.</p><p>As Annie lay shivering, staring at the dark canvas of the tent, hot tears ran down her face to pool on the itchy sleeping mat. She did her best to sniffle quietly, as not to wake Leliana, but the soft breathing of the bard was far too regular to be considered normal, and Annie knew that the redhead was awake, and had probably been eavesdropping.</p><p>Annie snorted a laugh and rolled onto her side. Her heart ached, terribly, and she imagined her mother's arms around her in a strong embrace, soft and warm, like she always did when boys had been horrible. </p><p>Deciding to force Leliana's hand, Annie rummaged in her pack until her hands closed around the familiar edges of her phone. The light from the screen flashed brighter than the fires at Ostagar and Annie narrowed her eyes. Leliana drew in a sharper breath. The earbuds were cool in Annie's ears and then, suddenly, the first notes of The Boxer were playing, and Annie smiled, sniffling.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>wow sorry it's taking so long to get into the main plot of the story lmfao</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. broken circle: part one</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>tw: gore, body horror, suicide ideation</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>chapter eight: broken circle (part one)</p>
<p>When Annie had been ten years old, her family and some friends had decided to visit a local nature reserve. She had chased the birds and ran laps of the lake and eaten ice cream, very much enjoying the freedom below the trees under a clear blue sky. When she had tried to scale the small cliff next to the lake, she misplaced a step and went tumbling down the stone, the world spinning until she was on her back in a thorn bush. She had not cried when her father fished her out; she had been laughing, apparently, as her mother, pale with fear, grasped her tightly beside the shore.</p>
<p>Back then, it seemed that nothing had consequences. Fall out of a tree, get back up again; swim out of your depth in a pool, just cough and splutter and carry on practicing front flips. Almost ten years later and a million light years away, you trip over a tree root, and someone almost dies.</p>
<p>The arrow that had gone through Alistair’s shoulder rested in the grass at his feet, sticky with blood. Morrigan and Aedan were fussing over the warrior, who clutched at the wound with white knuckles, his brow furrowed in pain.</p>
<p>“I-I’m sorry…” Annie stammered. At first, she wasn’t sure if anybody had even been listening, so she cleared her throat and repeated her apology, chanting, until Alistair looked up and hissed in pain.</p>
<p>“Just a flesh wound,” he said, smiling, and Annie felt herself flush. His head was tipped back, and his eyes were closed, like he was the handsome young subject of a Baroque painting.</p>
<p>Then Aedan’s leathers cracked as he stood and wiped his bloody hands on his tunic, and Annie snapped her gaze away from Alistair. “The healing potion should do the trick. Are you alright to carry on or shall we rest a while?” Aedan asked his fellow warden.</p>
<p>“I can move,” Alistair replied gruffly. Annie blinked in surprise as she watched Alistair pull himself to his feet, groaning.</p>
<p>“Are you sure?” she asked timidly.</p>
<p>“I’ve had worse,” he replied easily, and he cracked his neck.</p>
<p>“I’ll take your shield,” Aedan said as he held out an outstretched hand. Despite his lankier stature, the rogue shouldered the shield easily, and the group carried on trudging down the muddy path, silently.</p>
<p>Annie, lost in thought, hurried to catch up with them. Her boots squelched horribly in the saturated mud and she almost slipped again. Huffing and puffing, she caught up to Alistair’s side. “I’m really sorry about that. The shock of falling over phased me in again… you didn’t have to step in,” she told him. Annie stopped herself from glancing up at the warrior; if she even caught a glimpse of his pained wince or stiff shoulder, she was certain she would burst into tears again.</p>
<p>“The Fereldan mud isn’t your fault. Besides, Sten got his arm sliced open when I slipped earlier, and I’m pretty sure it was from my own blade!” Alistair replied brightly, and Annie smiled, gathering the courage to look up at his face. His nose was red from the pressure of his helmet and a dribble of dried blood crusted at the corner of his mouth. “Don’t dwell on it,” he continued, “ah, I should go talk with Aedan now…” he said rather abruptly, and Annie’s face fell as he scampered away with far more energy than an injured man should have possessed.</p>
<p>Sighing, Annie trudged along the path, alone.</p><hr/>
<p>Aedan and Alistair were already arguing in raised voices by the time Annie hauled herself into camp. Potato circled her weary legs, sniffing happily, as his master pulled a tent out of his pack with more force than necessary.</p>
<p>“I know you wish to see the Arl, Alistair, but after today I think it best that we implore the mages first-”</p>
<p>“Arl Eamon has perfectly fine healers!” Alistair replied angrily, “and we have… Morrigan.”</p>
<p>The witch made no reply, perhaps enjoying the spectacle too much. Annie glanced at her, and she almost laughed when she saw the witch’s small smirk. “You and I both know that healing is not my forte,” she scoffed, then turned her back to leave.</p>
<p>Alistair’s nostrils flared. “Aedan, we already agreed-”</p>
<p>Aedan whirled around to face his companion, his expression dark. “Alistair. I am trying to do what is best for our party. We will not survive the road to Redcliffe without sufficient healers.”</p>
<p>Annie gulped. Aedan was scary when he was angry. Annie turned her head in this game of verbal tennis to Alistair, who, to his credit, stood his ground, but seemed to be shrinking by the second. “We have healing potions-”</p>
<p>“We have three left, Alistair!” Aedan shouted, and the sudden change in volume made Annie flinch. Potato whimpered next to her. Aedan flexed his fingers and sighed. Alistair looked at him warily. “Morrigan is making more as we speak, but the potions will be weak,” he said quietly, avoiding Alistair’s gaze, then he drew in a deep breath and stepped towards the other Warden, whose gaze settled on his own feet. Aedan rested his hand on Alistair’s good shoulder, and the warrior sagged. “If another arrow goes through you, Alistair, or Maker forbid, a sword, I cannot promise that you would live to see the Arl,” Aedan said quietly, his tone somewhat… sad.</p>
<p>Alistair did not reply. The warrior breathed in, breathed out, then nodded. Aedan clapped his shoulder then withdrew, and Annie watched as Aedan left the camp in a daze. His usual confident gait was sloppy, and Annie considered following him, if only to return some of the comfort he had offered her. Potato beat her to it and shot off, bounding out of the clearing. Annie looked to Alistair, who was slumped on a log, head in his hands. At a loss, Annie announced in a wobbly voice that she was going to bathe, Sten’s nod being her only response. Swallowing, Annie hurried from the camp.</p><hr/>
<p>Bathing in freezing cold water was one of Annie’s least favourite activities. The sun had not yet set, and Annie splashed the small lake’s water up and down her grimy arms. Teeth chattering, Annie wiped away the moisture from her eyes. When she had started crying, Annie didn’t know.</p>
<p>Soft humming made Annie jump out of her skin with a garbled shriek. Her hands flew to her chest in some ingrained need for modesty and she turned in the waist-deep water to face Leliana. “Oh!” the redhead exclaimed, then she laughed. “Oh good, it’s just you, Annie. Do you mind if I also bathe?”</p>
<p>Annie blinked. “O- of course n-not,” she replied.</p>
<p>Annie turned around again when Leliana began to strip. A drop of water ran down her sharp nose and plopped into the lake. Ripples rushed past her thighs as Leliana entered the water, singing to herself softly. Annie sunk lower, hoping the murky depths would disguise her somewhat boyish figure. Annie didn’t need to see Leliana naked to know that she was gorgeous.</p>
<p>“Would you like me to wash your hair, Annie?”</p>
<p>Annie froze. “Oh, uhm, sure?”</p>
<p>“Lean back,”</p>
<p>Annie did as she was told. The water was cold against her back and she looked up at the grey, cloudy sky, and then Leliana’s face peered over her, smiling, and the grey light was blocked. Annie closed her eyes as Leliana cupped her hand and poured water over the top of her head, with another cold hand placed on Annie’s forehead to stop it trickling into her eyes. Leliana massaged her scalp with delicate hands, lathering the soap, and Annie sighed. Her mother used to do this for her, a lifetime ago, in warm water with Loreal No Tears shampoo.</p>
<p>The moment was over far too soon. Annie stood, still shivering, and smiled at Leliana, who made no move to cover herself. Annie gulped. <em>Gals being pals.</em></p>
<p>Leliana sank into the water and Annie followed, and then Annie took the bar of soap from the archer’s hands and returned the gesture. The sun was now low in the sky; light glinted off the lake's surface in a stream of white, until Annie was forced to squint her eyes. When Annie finished, she followed Leliana out of the water, shivering violently, until a wave of warmth rushed over her and slipped through her veins like pure heroin.</p>
<p>Her skin now dry, Annie hurried to put her clothes back on, and as her head peeked out of her clean Ralph Lauren jumper, a familiar black crow took off from a nearby branch and cawed as it soared into the sky.</p><hr/>
<p>Nobody really talked on their way to the Circle tower. Morrigan always flew ahead to scout the path, Sten seemed disdainful of unproductive conversation, and Alistair and Aedan were avoiding each other. As she watched Alistair shift his shield on his back, Annie wondered if her fall had led to this whole mess.</p>
<p>Leliana was her only companion who tried to make an effort with anyone. She was a charming young woman, who could talk about anything and everything; politics, weather, tactics, poetry, cookery… Annie did her best to keep up with her, and Leliana appeared pleased, but Annie could not help the sinking feelings of resentment and distrust in her chest whenever she looked at the beautiful archer.</p>
<p>However, Leliana was exceptionally kind; perhaps the kindest Thedosian Annie had met thus far. When the other woman washed her hair, or linked their arms whilst they walked, or wrapped her arms around her in the freezing nights, all thoughts of manipulation and diplomacy and distrust melted away, and Annie basked in her warmth.</p>
<p>“How old are you, Annie?” Leliana asked as they neared the end of their journey. Aedan had pushed them hard, walking from sunrise to sunset, and despite the darkspawn, they were close to the tower after a week of travelling.</p>
<p>“Eighteen,” Annie replied, and Leliana sighed.</p>
<p>“So young and so far from home,” Leliana muttered, and Annie looked down at her feet. “Alistair is but twenty and Aedan scarcely a year older…”</p>
<p>“And you?” Annie asked, looking up to study the curve of Leliana’s face and wrinkle-free brow. Leliana giggled.</p>
<p>“You have to guess,”</p>
<p> Annie kicked a stray stone and hummed in thought. “Well, you said we were really young, but you don’t look older than twenty-three. Twenty… six?”</p>
<p>“You would be correct!”</p>
<p>“That’s not that much older than me,” Annie said indignantly. Twenty-six years old back home would mean a university degree, moving out, first proper job… “Okay, maybe I am a bit of a baby.”</p>
<p>Leliana patted her arm. “Do not rush to grow up, Annie.”</p><hr/>
<p>The ghostly spire of Kinloch Hold loomed in the distance when they arrived at nightfall. The waters of Lake Calenhad lapped softly at the shoreline, and as they descended a grassy knoll, Annie glimpsed a lone Templar standing watch at the end of the small dock.</p>
<p>“Perhaps we should rest before meeting the mages. I am sure they would prefer if we called on them once the sun rises,” Leliana suggested to Aedan. His grey eyes were scanning his surroundings, as they always did, and he nodded.</p>
<p>“That is probably for the best,” he replied.</p>
<p>Alistair eased himself onto the ground with a tired groan, Annie following him to rest on the damp mildew. The warrior hadn’t talked to her much since… well, her confession, but he handed her a waterskin, and she drank from it eagerly. Leliana and Aedan chatted about buying supplies from the inn, and Sten followed Potato to a bunch of barrels, between which the dog sniffed about. Morrigan came to stand next to Annie. Annie cocked her head. The sun had set, and moonlight illuminated the lone spire in the distance. Everything was quiet. Eerie.</p>
<p>“Shouldn’t there be lights on in the tower? Or around it?” Annie asked as she gazed at the dead, grey stone. “I mean, I don’t know if the mages have a curfew or whatever, but it seems awfully… dark.”</p>
<p>“Hm,” Morrigan replied, and then the witch swept away.</p>
<p>“Well?” Annie asked, looking at Alistair, who seemed startled.</p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p>“Leliana said you trained as Templar. Should there be lights on? It’s like nobody’s in there.”</p>
<p>“I don’t know. I assume there is a curfew, but I suppose there should be lights in the Templar and Senior Mage quarters, at least,” he replied, and he cast his gaze out across the lake. “Fishy. And I don’t mean actually fishy, apparently all the fish die or mutate here because of all the potions.”</p>
<p>Annie snorted in a very unladylike manner and flushed. “Very fishy indeed,” she added.</p>
<p>Suddenly, the inn’s door flung open and Aedan strode down the grassy knoll to the dock. Alistair and Annie scrambled to their feet and Potato bounded after his master, who asked the Templar to be rowed across the lake.  </p>
<p>“I am the person appointed to stop all unauthorised access to the Circle Tower. Meaning you. Because you’re unauthorised,” the Templar told Aedan in a nasally voice.</p>
<p>“This is official Grey Warden business, now take me there,” Aedan said coolly.</p>
<p>“Oh, you’re a Grey Warden, are you? Prove it,” the Templar said, crossing his arms. Aedan looked the man up and down, then rummaged in his pack without breaking eye contact. Annie shivered. Intimidating indeed. Aedan thrust the Grey Warden documents into the man’s hand without a word.</p>
<p>“A Grey Warden seal! So you’re claiming to be one of those. You know, I have some documents too, they say I’m the Queen of Antiva. What do you think of that?” the Templar said snarkily.</p>
<p>Aedan’s expression remained neutral, but Annie knew that inside, a storm was brewing. After the man’s argument with Alistair, his patience did indeed have a limit. “I’m sure your superior won’t like that you’ve denied us crossing,” he said evenly, and the Templar visibly blanched.</p>
<p>“Come along, I suppose…” the Templar said quietly, and Aedan snatched the documents out of the man’s hands, and turned to his companions, nodding his head.</p>
<p>“You can stay here Sten, with the dog, and gather supplies,” Aedan ordered to the Qunari, who nodded.</p>
<p>“As you wish.”</p>
<p>Annie recalled the heated conversations between Sten and Morrigan; things to do with ‘control’, and ‘power’, and ‘danger’, and ‘bondage’. Perhaps leaving behind the Qunari instead of taking him onto an island inhabited by hundreds of mages was a good idea.</p>
<p>As she settled herself in the little rowboat, Annie’s mind conjured up images of castles and lakes and boats from Harry Potter, and she smiled to herself. “Everything alright?” Aedan asked, and Annie nodded.</p>
<p>“Just remembering something from home.”</p>
<p> Alas, no Sorting Hat nor grand feast awaited them at the shore. The tower was foreboding; Hogwarts was a school, but Kinloch Hold was a prison. When they entered the tower through the heavy, bolted doors, Templars rushed past to reinforce them again. Annie gulped, and Leliana grasped her arm tightly. Morrigan visibly tensed. Ahead of them, a man was ordering the doors to be closed.</p>
<p>“The doors are barred. Are they keeping people out, or in?” Alistair hissed to Aedan.</p>
<p>The man, who Annie assumed to be the leader here, turned and sighed. “Now we wait, and pray…”</p>
<p>“You’re Greagoir, I presume?” Aedan asked. Despite the obvious chaos and secrecy practically emanating from the tower walls, Aedan remained as diplomatic as ever. Clearly his patience extended for those he deemed important.</p>
<p>Annie looked around the large room; the walls were stone, and tinged a sickly purple, and paintings were ripped and hanging lopsidedly. The floor near the doors, she saw, was stained brown, as if something, or someone, had bled profusely there…</p>
<p>“… you must leave for your own safety!” Greagoir implored, and Annie’s attention snapped back to the conversation.</p>
<p>“I seek the mages’ aid,” Aedan replied coolly. Greagoir’s shoulder’s sagged and his face fell. He looked a defeated man.</p>
<p>“I am weary of the Grey Wardens’ ceaseless need for men to fight the darkspawn, but it is their right. You’ll find no allies here. The Templars can spare no men, and the mages are… indisposed. I shall speak plainly. The tower is no longer under our control. Abominations and demons stalk the tower’s halls. The Circle is lost. The tower has fallen.” Greagoir replied. Alistair and Morrigan looked at each other, concern evident on both their faces.</p>
<p>“How?” Aedan asked, his usual suaveness suddenly missing.</p>
<p>“We don’t know. They took us by surprise… we were prepared for one or two abominations, not a horde…”</p>
<p>“What are you going to do?”</p>
<p>“I would destroy the tower, raze it to the ground, but I cannot risk more of my men. The doors remain shut and they will protect us for now,” Greogoir answered, and Annie looked at the bloodstains on the floor. It seemed unfair to condemn so many people to death, she thought sadly, when they had done nothing but be born mages. If the orb had transported her to this hellhole instead of the Wilds, the Templars would have executed her on the spot.</p>
<p>“I have sent word to Denerim, calling for reinforcements and the Right of Annulment.”</p>
<p>“I shall look for survivors, before you call on the cavalry. Everybody deserves a second chance,” Aedan replied, and Greagoir’s head shot up in surprise.</p>
<p>“These abominations- they are like no other foe-”</p>
<p>“It is the right thing to do. I must try.” Aedan reiterated, and he began to walk towards the great, barred doors, as if nobody on Thedas could stop him. Leliana followed without hesitation, and Annie scurried after her. Alistair and Morrigan were more reluctant, but followed nonetheless, and Greagoir called to them:</p>
<p>“The doors will remain barred until you bring me proof that the Circle is safe. I will only believe it is over if the First Enchanter stands before me and tells me it is so. If Irving has fallen, then the Circle is lost, and must be destroyed. May Andraste lend you her courage whatever you decide.”</p>
<p>The Templars unbarred the heavy door and Annie did her best to avoid looking at the brown spot at her feet, then suddenly they were staring down a dark hallway, and the doors closed behind them. Silence was something Annie had grown accustomed to over the past month and a half; the wind rushing through grass and the leaves of trees, the hooting of birds in the sky, and the occasional howl in the far distance were Annie’s constant companions. Hours spent talking, much less listening to music, could be counted on one hand.</p>
<p>But Kinloch Hold was too quiet. Aedan paused at the entrance, taking in the ruined decorations, kicked-up rugs, and snuffed candles. Morrigan lit the end of her staff, throwing strange shadows of long candlesticks across the stone. Aedan and Leliana crept forwards, weapons drawn. Annie sandwiched herself between Morrigan and Alistair, her left hand grasping the crystal at her neck. The rogues made quick work of the adjacent rooms, and looted documents and herbs from broken chests, while Alistair stood guard at the door.</p>
<p>The further they ventured down the hallway, the more bodies littered the floor. Their limbs were bent at odd angles (some were completely wrenched off), some had skin so burnt that their flesh had completely melted away, some sat in pools of congealed blood, and some looked as if they had merely fallen asleep.</p>
<p>Vomit rose in Annie’s throat and she swallowed it down, averting her watering eyes to the back of Aedan’s head, instead trying to focus on the strands of hair that were loose from his small ponytail. She wanted to throw up and cry and scream simultaneously, or at least hold her nose against the stench of burnt and rotten flesh. Annie chanced a peak at Alistair, who was deathly pale, and grimacing. Annie wondered if this was going to be a clean-up mission rather than a rescue one, as Greagoir had told them.</p>
<p>Aedan put his ear to the following set of heavy doors, frowning, and put a finger to his lips. “Something’s happening the other side,” he hissed. Alistair opened the doors as Aedan and Leliana slipped inside, expecting trouble. Annie lingered behind, not quite trusting herself to not cause another life-threatening accident.</p>
<p>Then something inside glowed red, brighter and brighter until it began to peak through the gaps in the wood, and Annie looked inside. A fiery blob was advancing towards an old woman, with something like a clawed arm reaching out for her, and the woman turned it to ice, and she turned to Aedan in a defensive stance.</p>
<p>“It’s you! No… come no further. Grey Warden or no, I will strike you down where you stand!” she said breathlessly. Annie slipped through the door, her eyes meeting those of a young elven child, who looked like the ghost of a Victorian orphan.</p>
<p>“Wynne?” Aedan asked, astonished. “What are you doing here?”</p>
<p>Annie’s eyes drifted over to where the fiery demon had fallen; there was nothing left but melting black ice.</p>
<p>“I am a mage of the Circle. More importantly, why are you here, my lord? The Templars would not let anyone by,” the mage, Wynne, replied. Her silver hair was pulled into a severe bun, and she was tall, and broad, but somehow her features were rather elegant.</p>
<p>“I am seeking the aid of the mages,” Aedan answered, “though it seems my aid is required first.”</p>
<p>“Are they planning to attack the tower?” Wynne asked. The elven children cowered behind their teacher.</p>
<p>“Reinforcements and the Right of Annulment are yet to arrive,” Aedan replied. Wynne sighed.</p>
<p>“So they sent for it, then. I suppose they had no other choice. Some of us have survived, but we cannot hope to stand against an army of Templars,” she murmured, pacing the room. Behind her, a purple magical barrier rippled over a set of doors.</p>
<p>“There is still hope, Wynne. We shall not abandon the mages,” Aedan reassured her, “but we must know what happened, if you have any information.”</p>
<p>Whether Aedan truly had the mages’ best interests at heart or merely cared for their healing and destructive skills, Annie didn’t know, but he did put on a convincing show. It really was a good thing Sten wasn’t there.</p>
<p>“Let it suffice to say that we had something of a revolt on our hands, led by a mage named Uldred. When he returned from the battle at Ostagar, he tried to take over the Circle. As you can see, it didn’t work out as he had planned. I do not know what became of him, but I am certain this is of his doing. I will not lose the Circle to one man’s pride and stupidity,” explained Wynne. “If you join me, I will dispel this barrier which protects the children. We have little time.”</p>
<p>“Very well,” Aedan affirmed, and Morrigan turned to him, a scowl on her face.</p>
<p>“You want us to assist this preachy schoolmistress? To rescue these pathetic excuses for mages?” she asked, and Annie frowned. <em>Someone felt threatened</em>.</p>
<p>“They’re not pathetic, Morrigan. They’re probably more useful than I am, at this point,” Annie said to her, and Morrigan blinked in surprise, then laughed.</p>
<p>“Do what you wish, then. I care not.”</p>
<p>Annie caught Aedan’s smile. Well, she may have forced Morrigan to admit that she was a useless party member in this very important quest to save the world, but it was for a good reason, right?</p>
<p>“Your generosity knows no bounds, Morrigan,” Aedan deadpanned, and Alistair exhaled something like a laugh.</p>
<p>Wynne ordered her apprentices to watch the children, and Aedan turned to Annie and quirked an eyebrow, nodding his head towards the apprentices gathering the children far from the door. Annie shook her head: despite the fact that she was living in a literal horror movie, she had to admit that her abilities protected her more than most. To back out would be too shameful to bear.</p>
<p>She followed Morrigan as if she were the witch’s own shadow as Wynne dispelled the barrier. The other side was even darker than the previous hallway, and both mages in the party offered light from their staffs, then the group edged forwards. It was rather cold, Annie thought, as she watched her breath ghost slightly in front of her face. Moonlight streamed through small windows near the impossibly high ceiling and cast the hallways in a dream-like sleepiness. They crept past corpses on the floor, then rounded a corner, then something screeched horribly, and a hunched, warped creature in Templar armour ran towards them.</p>
<p>An arrow erupted in its eye, and then it was encased in ice, and then suddenly everyone wanted in on the action. Annie closed her eyes and let her body do the rest of the work. She could hardly see anything at all when she opened them again, but she could make out Wynne engaged with another mangled Templar, and she willed her legs to carry her along the wobbly floor. Phasing in again to stab it through the back of the neck almost seemed too easy, and the black ichor that sprayed from its artery was foul and viscous.</p>
<p>Wynne’s eyes were wide as the older witch considered her. Annie smiled sheepishly. Aedan sauntered over, a black stripe across his nose, and similarly smiled at Wynne. “Annie is… special,” he explained brightly, and Wynne put away her staff.</p>
<p>“I can see that,”</p>
<p>“This happened before the Circle fell, don’t worry,” Annie said quickly. Wynne nodded her head and wandered away. Annie let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding. Aedan gently touched her arm as he passed by.</p>
<p>Amongst the looting and searching and creeping around, abominations and fiery demons sporadically attacked them. Annie didn’t know what to make of them, really; they were not as terrifying as the demons depicted in horror films back home (she was glad nobody was scuttling about on their backs, anyway), but if she remembered that the abominations had once been people, her stomach would flip, and her dagger would still in her hands.</p>
<p>Luckily, their party was more than capable of defeating the monsters quickly and without much hassle, even without much help on her part. They went up a level, and the air became much colder, as Alistair remarked. A lone figure stood in the darkness; Aedan unsheathed a dagger and crept forwards, though the figure made no move.</p>
<p>“Please refrain from going into the stockroom, it is a mess and I have not been able to get it into a state fit to be seen,” a man said monotonously. Aedan lowered his arm.</p>
<p>“Who are you?” Aedan asked, and the party caught up to their leader’s side.</p>
<p>“I am called Owain, and I manage the Circle’s magical stockroom. I was trying to tidy up but there was little I could do,” the man replied in his dead voice. Something about his stillness and vacant gaze made Annie’s hairs stand on end. When she looked at him properly in the low light, her eyes settled on his forehead, where a sun had been branded red onto his skin. Annie gulped.</p>
<p>“You should go to the lower levels, we have cleared out the abominations there,” Aedan told the strange man.</p>
<p>“I would prefer not to die. I would prefer if the tower returned to the way it was. Perhaps Niall will succeed and save us all,” Owain said.</p>
<p>“What’s Niall trying to do?” Aedan pressed.</p>
<p>“Niall came here with other mages and took the Litany of Adralla,” Owain explained.</p>
<p>“But that protects against mind domination… is blood magic at work here?” Wynne wondered aloud.</p>
<p>“I do not know,” Owain replied. Annie had never seen blood magic before, but if even Morrigan refused to practice such an art, then it could only mean trouble.</p>
<p>“Let us find this Niall, then,” Aedan announced, and they abandoned Owain to his fate.</p>
<p>“Why was he like that?” Annie hissed to Leliana.</p>
<p>“I do not know. I only know that the Circles make mages tranquil by their own request or if they… misbehave,” she replied. Annie turned to look at the Tranquil mage, who was bending down to arrange some books on the floor. It seemed a sad existence.</p>
<p>They encountered the first blood mages not too long after. Wynne immediately cast a protective barrier, and a blue, shimmery wave crashed over their party. One blood mage, who looked to be no older than Annie herself, took out a dagger and slashed her own forearm, and raised her staff above her head. Annie felt herself phase out before she found out what spell the girl was casting.</p>
<p>Morrigan was flinging lightning across the room and the electricity glinted off Alistair’s armour as he rushed forwards; a burst of white light erupted from his palms and the mages stumbled back, one of them into Aedan’s awaiting dagger.</p>
<p>Suddenly, Alistair was raised into the air, and then Morrigan fell to her knees, and Wynne stumbled and fell back against a bookshelf. Panicked, Annie looked up at Aedan’s shape amongst the strings of the new dimension, and he was similarly on the floor, Leliana next to him. One of the mages was chanting something, his eyes squeezed shut, and when Annie squinted her eyes and moved closer, she saw that blood was rushing out of one of Alistair’s wounds beneath his armour to pool on the floor.</p>
<p>Annie was then in front of the mage. He had not noticed her. His companion had, however, and screamed at him. His eyes opened, and Annie saw that they were young and clear and somehow frightened. Then she saw that they were a sea-green, and his hair was red, then her arm was rushing upwards-</p>
<p>Pain exploded in her knuckles like a thousand glass splinters had pierced her skin and the mage crumpled to the floor. Behind her, something crashed to the ground, and the other blood mage was wide eyed, then a lightning bolt struck her in the chest and she fell down, screaming. Annie cradled her aching fist in her hand. Not the cleanest punch.</p>
<p>The female mage writhed on the floor in pain, and Aedan hauled himself off the ground to turn her over with his boot. “I know I have no right to ask for mercy, but I didn’t mean for this death and destruction. We were just trying to free ourselves…” she mumbled, blood dripping from the corner of her mouth. Annie’s head pounded and she felt as if she were about to faint. Somebody grasped her waist (had she been swaying?) and held her upright. It was Alistair, Annie realised, when she breathed in the smell of his sweat. He was leaning against her too, like they were doing some sort of group experiment in a physics lesson.</p>
<p>“But blood magic?” Aedan asked.</p>
<p>“Somebody must always take the first step… no matter the cost…” the woman replied, coughing.</p>
<p>“Nothing is worth what you’ve done to this place,” Wynne said coldly.</p>
<p>“Normally, I try to extend my sympathy to your people. After all, you cannot help being who you are,” Aedan said, crouching down to her level. “But you almost killed my friends, and that is unforgivable,” he hissed, and her eyes went wide and she opened her mouth to speak, then suddenly Aedan’s dagger was poking out through her back. A horrible wheeze escaped her throat, then she died.</p>
<p>She can’t have been much older than me, Annie thought, and she watched Aedan wipe his brow. Children killing children.</p>
<p>Wynne came over and hovered her hand over Alistair’s sternum. A golden glow emanated from her hands, and Alistair’s face became less pained, until he breathed a sigh of relief. “Let’s look at your hand, dear,” she said softly. Annie rested her reddened, shaking hand into the older woman’s own wrinkled and calloused hands. The glow warmed her muscles, easing her aches, and she felt her bones shift back into place. “By the Maker, you’re as hard to heal as a dwarf,” Wynne said exasperatedly, and a drop of sweat rolled down her forehead.</p>
<p>“Thanks,” Annie said quietly. Wynne smiled.</p>
<p>They pressed on, Annie ignoring the blood dripping from Leliana’s dagger after the archer… finished what Annie started. There were endless chambers to comb through and rid of demons, like they were some sort of anti-demon pest control. There was a man hiding in a wardrobe, and zombie, skeleton-like creatures that threw punches and bit. They were easier to kill emotionally but harder physically, Annie realised, as she dodged a rotting hand and pushed away one of them with a kick. They were easier to kill with ice. Fire just… set them on fire, making them even more evasive. Once they were all killed, stamina potions were distributed and Annie chugged hers down like the first beer at a party. It had been almost twenty hours since she had properly rested.</p>
<p>Irving’s office was eerily warm when they entered. A fire was still blazing, and Annie eased herself down onto the carpet, basking in its heat. Alistair joined her with a groan. They did not care much for looting, and they waited for the others to cease their search of every nook and cranny in the room. The First Enchanter remained elusive.</p>
<p>The brief respite was over before it began and Aedan moved them on, up another wide staircase that made Annie’s knees hurt. The endless spiral path they were following almost made Annie dizzy, and she trudged along at the back of the group, miserable. She was going to have so many nightmares once she finally got to sleep.</p>
<p>An emissary in one antechamber made for an interesting fight; it was ghostly and creepy and extremely powerful and it floated along the air like a leaf, hovering just out of Annie’s reach, and she waited for Morrigan to finally paralyze it before Alistair could thrust his sword upwards in the final kill. How that man was still standing, Annie couldn’t guess.  Daylight was beginning to creep in through the high windows; Annie’s temples pounded, and her eyes drooped in exhaustion.</p>
<p>Then, if things couldn’t get any worse, their enemies continued to be… people. Templars possessed by demons charged at them with no abandon; they could not be incapacitated, only killed, and Annie hung back under the pretence of pursuing the desire demon controlling them. Eating hare stew and killing darkspawn were two things, killing people, actual living, breathing, people, was quite another.</p>
<p>Once the room had been cleared, the silence was deafening. Aedan heaved in deep breaths, blood dripping from his daggers, and sat himself on the floor. “Does… does anyone have any water left?” he asked breathlessly. Alistair handed him a waterskin and he drank eagerly. Annie slid against the door until she was sitting down. She fumbled in her pockets and found a piece of bread and she bit into it, her teeth almost breaking on the stale crust. The bread was tasteless.</p>
<p>Scarcely five minutes later they were moving again, through rooms bathed in blood with flesh hanging from the ceiling which dripped warm droplets onto those who passed underneath.<em> If I ever make it home, I’ll need a lifetime of weekly therapy sessions.</em></p>
<p>The thirst for therapy was only worsened by the room that lay ahead. A purple, voluptuous desire demon stood next to a Templar, whispering stories of children into his ear. She was giving him love, she said, love and a family and everything he had ever wanted. Aedan reminded her that it was a farce and that she was killing him; in the end, Aedan was the one that killed him, with a slash to the throat that made him choke on his own blood. Annie wondered if the other option had been more merciful.</p>
<p>But the others were set in their ways, and viewed any consort with demons as ‘abhorrent’, and ‘unholy’, as put by Wynne and Leliana, and the man died alone. More possessed templars fell under their blades and Annie spent her time closing her eyes and backstabbing the zombie things, which attacked the party like annoying gnats.</p>
<p>At last, however, they came to a central chamber, decorated with the bloody, fleshy sacs and more corpses. They were nearing the top of the tower, and yellow light streamed in earnest through the bigger windows, but a taller, broader, lumbering abomination stood in their way. Annie made to disappear again, but then the creature opened its mouth and <em>words</em> came out.</p>
<p>“Oh, look, visitors. I would entertain you but… too much effort involved,” its voice was gravelly, and sleepy, and Annie gulped in fright.</p>
<p>“Not to worry, we shan’t trouble you long,” Aedan said brightly, drawing his daggers with a charming grin.</p>
<p>“But wouldn’t you just like to lay down and… forget about all this? Leave it all behind?” it said lazily. Leliana began to droop next to her, and Annie looked to her side, seeing Wynne and Alistair similarly lowering to the ground.</p>
<p>“Can’t… keep… eyes… open… someone… pinch… me…” Alistair mumbled. Anxiety bubbled in Annie’s chest and she desperately looked to Aedan, who was now on his knees. </p>
<p>“Resist!” she heard Wynne implore, and the creature sighed.</p>
<p>“Why do you fight? You deserve more… you deserve a rest. The world will go on without you…” the creature soothed, and Annie let her eyes close, just for a moment. The floor was cold underneath her cheek, and then she saw a strange landscape of rocks and islands suspended in a dreary, yellow sky.</p>
<p>Suddenly, she startled awake, and sat up with her heart pounding in her chest. “Hmmm… stubborn…” a deep, lazy voice drifted across the room, and her head snapped to the side to see the ugly abomination advancing towards her.</p>
<p>Terrified, Annie looked to her companions, who were sleeping peacefully on the ground. “G-guys?” she asked, but nobody answered. She could almost smell the creature; rotting and stagnant…</p>
<p>All she could do was run.</p>
<p>She turned, scrambling on her hands and knees towards the doors, then they swung shut with a bang that reverberated through every bone in her body. Something cold wrapped around her ankle and Annie screamed; she was lifted off the ground and all blood rushed to her skull. The creature turned her around until she was almost eye-level with its mangled face, its clawed arm holding her high above its head.</p>
<p>“Fascinating,” was all it said, and its claws pierced her skin, drawing blood which trickled down her leg. She tried to turn in its grasp, swinging wildly in the air, and her head <em>pounded</em> , then she was staring down at a man on the ground, whose mouth was hung open and his eyes were open wide. In his pale hands rested a big, dusty, leather tome. Annie screamed again.</p>
<p>Then she was suddenly falling, gold and pink and red streaming past her in strings of light, and she kept falling and screaming but no sound was coming out of her mouth. Her hand reached out, desperately, until it closed around one of those strings and it <em>burned</em> as she fell, and she was slowing down, but only just, and Annie fleetingly wondered if she would be falling right through the planet and all the way back to Earth again, and how sweet that would be.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>quarantine means 12000 words written lol</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. broken circle: part two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>tw: gore, panic, suicide ideation</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The landing knocked the wind out her lungs and snapped her neck backwards. Everything was dark. She was lying in something soft and old-smelling. Her whole body ached.</p><p>“Who goes there?” somebody called out hoarsely. Still winded, all she could do was choke out a sob. “Who?” they repeated. Annie couldn’t move her legs. “By the Maker-”</p><p>Somebody was hovering over her in the darkness; their hair was long and matted and tickled her face, smearing the tears all over her skin. “How did you…?” they asked. Their voice was masculine and dry, like they hadn’t used it for a long time, and their breath was less than pleasant. Then cold, skinny hands settled on her stomach, and the person drew in a sharp intake of breath. “I think your back is broken,” they said softly, and Annie’s chest heaved.</p><p>“It’s so dark… I can’t-can’t move my feet…” she cried, her voice garbled by tears. The man shushed her.</p><p>“I can try to help… but I am very weak, without lyrium I cannot-”</p><p>“Check the front pocket of my jacket… there… might be one… inside…” she said hoarsely.</p><p>
  <em>Paralyzed. Paralyzed.</em>
</p><p>The man rummaged in her denim jacket pocket, and it seemed he would be searching forever, as Annie breathed in his stale scent and let tears soak her clothes, until he let out a sound of relief, and removed the ball of socks which protected the lyrium potion. She had been carrying it for Wynne.</p><p>She heard the cork being unplugged and the man gulped it down. “Okay, okay, just stay calm… spines are hard to heal…”</p><p>She closed her eyes and let the mage do his thing. She was so tired, but his magic was so warm in the darkness and coldness of whichever part of the god-forsaken tower she had landed in. She felt sick, more so than she had felt thus far on this doomed rescue mission. It felt like her ribs were rattling in her chest with every breath she took.</p><p>It felt like an eternity, lying there, a blue glue emanating from behind her eyelids. “Almost there,” the man reassured. “There.”</p><p>Annie tried to wriggle her toes. They did as she bid, though with substantial resistance. Her entire body felt like one big bruise.</p><p>“You heal like a dwarf,” the man panted, and Annie almost laughed.</p><p>“Not the first time I’ve heard that today,” she gasped.</p><p>“Can you sit up?” the mage asked, and he slipped his cold, bony hands behind her back, and gently raised her. Annie groaned in pain; it felt like a steel rod was under her skin, and it hurt so badly, but she could do it. “Good,” the mage breathed, “now, who are you, and how on Thedas did you get in here?”</p><p>Annie let out a shaky laugh which jostled her sore ribs. “I fell.”</p><p>“Through the ceiling?”</p><p>“Yep.”</p><p>A moment of silence, then the man laughed, and despite his weakness, his laugh was rich and infectious. “Well, alrighty then. Can you help me out of here?”</p><p>“I can try… but give me a few minutes…” Annie replied. Her bones and nerves were still stitching themselves together, Annie swore, making her itch unbearably underneath her skin. “Who are you, anyways?”</p><p>“I’m Anders,” the man replied, and Annie could hear the smile in his voice. “Troublesome mage. Got a year's solitary confinement for trying to escape.”</p><p>“I’m sorry to hear that,” she said to him, and she meant it. Now that she was thinking about it, she had been very lucky indeed to crash land in front of Flemeth’s hut. Almost too lucky. “I’m Annie.”</p><p>A ball of blue light expanded in his hands and lit up the dank cell. His face was long and pinched, with deep, dark circles under his eyes, and his cheekbones were gaunt. The blue light cast a sickly tone to his pale skin. Though he was severely neglected and malnourished, he looked somewhat handsome, and Annie smiled. At least somebody was faring worse than her in the personal hygiene department.</p><p> “Charmed. I’ve not been fed for three days. What’s going on up there?” he asked. Visions of blood and fleshy sacs and demons and twisted Templars flashed through Annie’s mind and she heaved a sigh.</p><p>“The Circle has fallen. Something about a guy called Uldred and… blood magic,” she said slowly, and quietly. Anders’ eyes went wide.</p><p>“Fuck,” was all he said, and he looked down at the glowing ball of light in his hands. “How many… dead?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” she replied in a small voice, “there were lots of bodies… a few survivors…”</p><p>Anders exhaled deeply, and though he did not cry, a strange emptiness was in his eyes. Much like her first week in Thedas, Annie was at a loss. Her companions were floors above, sleeping, held captive by the demon; this Niall and Uldred were still at large, and the senior enchanters were nowhere to be found. Here she was, stuck in a damp, dark cell with a newly healed body, and there was nothing she could do.</p><p>“Well, I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to die down here,” Anders announced, suddenly full of energy, and he hauled himself off the straw-covered ground. He held onto the cell bars and his palms glowed red, but the iron did not budge. “Enchantment still alive and well, I see,” he spat, and he slumped to the floor again.</p><p>Annie looked up at the black ceiling, her neck cracking uncomfortably. She had fallen through solid rock. “Help me up,” she croaked, and Anders scrambled to his unsteady feet, hands outstretched. Annie wobbled as she stood, and they both clung to each other like baby giraffes. Annie laughed, then Anders chuckled too, and she took her first baby step, her legs as heavy as dumbbells.</p><p>She fell against the iron bars and grasped them in her hands until her knuckles turned white. Anders’ blue light floated next to her, reflecting in the dampness of the cold dungeon. Annie shivered; she hated being underground. Drawing in a deep breath, she imagined her atoms shifting, though it took longer than usual, perhaps owed to the discomfort settling deep in her newly healed bones.</p><p>The bars became warmer, until it was like she wasn’t touching anything at all, and Annie opened her eyes. She could hardly see a thing, but she could somehow… feel. The strings in her hands were rigid, but then they suddenly gave way, and she was pulling them aside like a curtain. She stumbled forwards, her sea legs proving most unhelpful in an already unsteady dimension.</p><p>Gasping, she felt the world whizz by again, and she fell to her knees on the damp stone. Anders whistled behind her. “Impressive,” he deadpanned, “abomination? Spirit?”</p><p>“Neither,” Annie replied, getting to her feet. “I’m not even a bloody mage.”</p><p>Anders laughed, the rich sound bouncing off the cold walls. A water droplet fell from the ceiling into her hair and Annie shivered. “Hold out your hands,” Annie ordered the mage, and he did as he was bid. Annie slipped her hands between the iron bars and grasped one of his skinny forearms, closing her eyes. Once the draught had disappeared, and she could no longer hear the trickle of water, her other hand tugged on the strings of the bars and pulled it aside, then Anders was suddenly falling forwards.</p><p>They fell in a heap on the wet floor. Anders rolled to the side, spluttering, and Annie winced at the knock to her head. “Sorry, forgot to mention you might feel a bit sick,” she mumbled.</p><p>“A bit? I feel…” Anders groaned, and then he retched. “Awful.”</p><p>They lay there for a few moments, letting the cold water drip onto their faces. “You don’t seem too fazed by what just happened,” Annie said aloud. The room was still spinning.</p><p>Anders snorted. “You just told me the Circle had fallen and blood mages were running about, after falling through the solid rock ceiling.”</p><p>“Hmm. You have a point,” she responded. The stone beneath her back was freezing and damp; for a second, if she let her mind wander, it was almost like she was back at Ostagar. Annie’s eyes snapped open. Beside her, Anders began to sit up. She stared at the yawning blackness above; Aedan and the others were still up there, whether alive, or dead, or still sleeping. Someone, somewhere, was also on their way to Kinloch Hold with the Right of Annulment in their hands.</p><p>“Greagoir sent for the right of Annulment,” Annie told Anders, who stilled in his efforts to brush out his hair with his fingers. He was quiet for a moment.</p><p>“I suppose it’s too much to ask you to get us through these walls and make our escape,” he said quietly.</p><p>“I’m not a great swimmer.”</p><p>Anders slouched over, head in his hands. “Why are you here, anyway?”</p><p>Annie licked her dry lips and tried to ignore her growing headache. “I came here with other Grey Wardens to enlist the mages’ help against the Blight.”</p><p>“There’s a Blight?” Anders asked. “You’re a Warden? Maker’s breath, it just gets worse…”</p><p>Annie’s lower lip wobbled and she drew in a shaky breath. “My… companions, are upstairs. We came into this room where an abomination told us to rest and they just… lay down and fell asleep. I woke up pretty quickly and the abomination picked me up, and I screamed, then fell… into your cell,” she explained, and her heart hurt to remember what was happening upstairs.</p><p>“Bloody void…” Anders mumbled, and he heaved a heavy sigh. “You’re not making me feel any better about the situation, Annie.”</p><p>Annie smiled softly, then eased herself off the ground with a groan, until she was facing Anders. “I should go help them, or at least find this Niall and Uldred… but I don’t know what to do. I’m not very good at fighting,” she confessed. Anders grasped her shoulders and forced her to look at him. Though the blue light made the room feel as if it were underwater in a shipwreck, Anders’ eyes were dark and warm, and his words were slow and comforting.</p><p>“I hold no love for this Circle, but I must try and help save the innocent. As mages we should not be condemned for events beyond our control,” he explained, and Annie nodded, furiously.</p><p>“Apparently there’s a guy called Niall who took the Litany of Ad-whoever to stop the blood magic,” Annie sniffled. “I saw a man on the floor up there, holding a book. It could have been him.”</p><p>“Okay… we’ll retrace your steps, somehow get past the Sloth demon, and stop this madness…” Anders told her. “Don’t cry, we’ll somehow get through this, even if we have to jump through the walls into Lake Calenhad and swim for our lives,” he tried to reassure Annie, and she laughed.</p><p>It took a while to reach the upper levels; Anders was weak from his confinement, and Annie’s newly healed body left her gasping for air when they went up the stairs. The dungeon door had been left open, as if the Templars had fled without much thought for their captive, and Anders looted a magical staff from a nearby storage room.</p><p>He was sickly pale and skinny, and his dirtied white tunic made him look like the ghost of Christmas past. He was exceptionally kind, however, and steered Annie around with such care that he could only have been a healer. Thoughts of potential blood magic and danger disappeared from Annie’s assumptions of the man; if he told her to jump from the staircase and into his arms, she would have done it.</p><p>Anders’ honey eyes betrayed no emotion as they passed the bodies, and Annie wondered if he did truly care for his dead and dying peers, or whether he just wanted to prevent the Templars getting their way. Though if she had spent the last few months isolated in a dank cell, after years of imprisonment, Annie supposed that the line between compassion and revenge would be difficult to perceive.</p><p>They passed the room in which the possessed Templar had choked on his own blood and Annie grabbed Anders’ arm. “The Sloth demon is in the central chamber,” she hissed, “do you have a plan?”</p><p>Anders peaked his head around the corner, as if he could see the demon. “I can distract the demon while you sneak past and get the litany.”</p><p>“And after that?”</p><p>“I’ll probably be pulled under and you’ll have to go it alone.”</p><p>Annie stared at him. She almost laughed. “That’s your plan?”</p><p>“Can you think of anything better? Killing the demon would also kill your friends.”</p><p>Annie’s headache now pounded in earnest. “I guess we don’t have any other options. I’ll probably be killed by Uldred though, just so you know,”</p><p>Anders grinned, and some of Annie’s fear melted away when she saw his smile. “You can walk through walls, Annie. I think you’ll be fine.”</p><p>Annie suddenly had the overwhelming urge to burst into tears again; Anders was being so kind, but the task ahead was so dangerous… she had never had responsibility like this before. “Last time I tried to help, somebody got an arrow in the shoulder,” she said quietly, and she leant against the wall to steady herself. Anders joined her.</p><p>“These things happen.”</p><p>The others were just behind the wall, Annie remembered; they were slowly wasting away, trapped in sleep, and all she could think about was potentially getting hurt. Anders was right; she literally had the power to just walk away, right through the wall and into the lake below. She owed it to her companions to at least try.</p><p>“Hopefully my sacrifice will spur you on,” Anders continued, “like in all the great stories and songs.”</p><p>Annie scowled. “Don’t say stuff like that. It makes me feel worse.”</p><p>“Sorry,” Anders said sheepishly, a smile on his lips.</p><p>“Assuming I succeed, which isn’t likely, what will you do afterwards?” Annie asked him.</p><p>“Make my great escape, of course,” he replied. “Come, let us not waste more time.”</p><p>He flashed another grin, and Annie flushed, before he sauntered down the hallway and pushed the doors open with enough flare to make Freddy Mercury jealous. The low, lazy voice of the demon greeted him, and Annie hurried to the door, staying silent and focusing until their voices became distorted, and the wall felt wobbly.</p><p>She peeked past the strings of the wall and looked inside the room, straining her eyes. Anders was doing some sort of trick with his borrowed staff, but he was slowly sagging to the ground, and Annie knew that time was running out. She started to run.</p><p>
  <em>The demon can’t hurt me. The demon can’t hurt me.</em>
</p><p>Annie crouched beside the unconscious man and reached out for the book. Her fingers brushed the strings of the cover and she pulled it to her chest, then pushed herself off the ground (almost keeling over) and focused on her feet (trying not to fall through the floor again). Annie spun around, disoriented for a moment, and she could have sworn the Sloth demon looked her dead in the eyes, and she panicked and veered to the right. An arched doorway lay ahead.</p><p>The Litany almost vibrated against her skin. It was probably enchanted with Fade magic, which seemed to pull it in almost every direction in the strange string dimension, and Annie prayed that it would remain out of the demon’s sight. Gritting her teeth, she pushed forwards. She streamed through endless corridors and chambers until her eyes hurt from the curious shapes and colours that surrounded her. Winged shadows approached in her periphery and Annie tried to run faster, but the dream-like dimension slowed her down like she was running in a swimming pool.</p><p>It was Ostagar all over again. Annie began to hear screams and shouts and clashes of steel on steel, and then the downpour of rain and roll of thunder, and she shook her head and clutched the book tighter. Kinloch Hold was silent, she tried to remind herself. The screams grew louder and louder until Annie had to skid to a halt and rest against a wall, chest heaving with pain and exhaustion.</p><p>It sounded so real… so real, in fact, that Annie turned and squinted her eyes at her surroundings. As far as she could tell, nobody was there, except the ghostly shape of a lone shade that floated along the floor, unaware of the barely visible human girl in its territory.</p><p>Once again, Annie was reminded of the nightmare that was this planet. When she was chatting with Leliana, or playing with Potato, or even just appreciating the wild, untouched landscape around her, she could almost forget the pain and suffering. Beyond those moments, however, Thedas reduced her to an almost mute, wide-eyed mess.</p><p>The shade brushed past her leg and a shiver racked her body. Annie drew in a deep breath and let go of the wall. She drifted down the hallways as if she were sleepwalking; she wondered if she would reach the very top of the tower without ever finding Uldred or the First Enchanter. If that were to happen, she would probably just throw herself into the lake.</p><p>Her feet dragged along the floor, making the strings vibrate like those of a guitar. She came to another door and pulled the strings aside, making herself smile. She could get used to walking through walls, she supposed.</p><p>Somebody was murmuring, or chanting, inside the room, and Annie paused. Cautiously, she walked through the door, and a man was kneeling on the ground with his hands clasped together. She took a step closer, and the man came into focus: he was wearing silver Templar armour. He was praying to Andraste, Annie realised, and she turned to the side to look at the rest of the room.</p><p>Aside from the usual dark red shadows on the floor (blood, as always), there were things pinned to the wall, and Annie crept forwards to take a closer look. They were black blobs as far as she could tell, and she crept closer, until she was almost touching them. Her eyes scanned the blobs and then she reached out, and her fingertip brushed the shadow, until it suddenly came into focus and bleeding eyes were staring at her.</p><p>Annie dropped the book. It disappeared from her grasp and crashed to the physical floor. The templar in the corner jumped up and shouted, “Who goes there?”</p><p>Shaking, Annie stumbled backwards, and the world flew past. She landed on her poor back with a silent scream. Annie groaned at the ache in her back and she rolled to the side; the Templar was staring at her, and a purple curtain of light was trapping him beside the staircase.</p><p>“Begone, spirit!” he shouted, and Annie rolled her eyes. She did not need this right now. Eventually, after some huffing and puffing, she got to her feet again, and brushed the dirt off her clothes. She bent down and picked up the book again and made for the stairs.</p><p>“You know I can try and get you out of there,” Annie offhandedly commented. She looked up at the door above her, and a strange foreboding weight settled in her stomach.</p><p>“I do not bargain with demons and spirits,” the Templar replied, irked.</p><p>“I’m not a demon or a spirit or an abomination,” Annie hissed, spinning around until she was staring down the templar’s brown eyes. He looked a bit like Alistair. “And I’m sick of everyone assuming I’m out to get them when I’m really trying to help.”</p><p>Annie began to ascend the stairs. Her legs were swaying and her vision fizzled out at the edges; she needed a nap, ASAP. “Wait!” the templar called, and Annie halted, her iron grip on the bannister the only thing preventing her from tumbling down. “You… mean to end this?”</p><p>Annie nodded. Her head was as heavy as a bowling ball. “Apparently this litany helps against blood magic. I have a few other tricks up my sleeve as well,” she replied. She was so, so tired.</p><p>“I… wish you luck,” he said carefully.</p><p>“Thanks,” was all with which Annie responded. The door ahead was smaller than the others, and less grand, but something about its aura set Annie on edge. When she reached the top of the staircase, the hairs on her arms were standing on end, as if the air was crackling with static electricity. Annie almost hurled last night’s dinner over the bannister. With shaking hands, she pushed the doors open.  </p><p>Lightning exploded in the room in great flashes of light and the electricity buzzed over her skin and down her spine. People were on the floor, bound, crying, and screaming. The windows had been smashed and the wind was gusty. A great pool of sticky blood was spreading across the centre of the room. In the middle of it all, a bald man was holding his hands to the sky, chanting.</p><p>Annie struggled to breathe. Her stomach was in knots, and goosebumps were raised on her skin. Then the man turned to look at her with his beady eyes and she slumped against the door, speechless. Abominations with wrangled faces began to approach.</p><p>“Ah, look what we have here… I thought all the unharrowed had been found,” the man said slyly, and his voice was as slimy as his face. “Care to join in our… revels?” he asked. Annie gulped.</p><p>“Uhm, thanks for the offer but… no. This is too fucked up,” Annie replied. Any eloquent thoughts of mage freedom and morals slipped from her mind as she stared at what lay before her. The man laughed, and it was a horrible sound that grated on her ears.</p><p>“Come, dear. Let yourself service your betters.”</p><p>Nausea transformed into rage. Annie scowled at the man. “You should be ashamed of yourself. Although, I don’t think that’s a part of your vocabulary.”</p><p>The man, who Annie assumed to be Uldred, laughed again. “How could I be ashamed when I have released them from the shackles of inferiority?”</p><p>Annie considered the abominations next to him; they were bigger and scarier, yes, but they were also the ugliest things Annie had ever seen. Annie pulled a face. “I wouldn’t consider looking like a dog’s regurgitated dinner superior, if I’m being honest.”</p><p>“Pft! Such a shallow view of the world!” Uldred exclaimed, and a wicked glint shone in his eyes, “perhaps it would be a great lesson for you, girl… appearances are certainly not everything.”</p><p>He threw his arms in the air again and a great ball of eerie light erupted between his palms. The abominations at his side did the same as their master, and the air became electrified, then suddenly Annie was on her back and sliding towards them. Bile rose in her throat and she desperately kicked her legs out, and the flashes of lightning left white spots in her vision. Suddenly, she was looking up at Uldred’s creepy face, and the white light came crashing down.</p><p>Annie drew in a deep breath and closed her eyes. The white light disappeared, leaving Annie looking up at the stringed ceiling, and she smiled. Uldred, however, was most certainly not smiling. As he scrambled for answers, confusion crossing his awful face, Annie opened the Litany and flicked through the pages.</p><p>“Kill her!” she heard him screech, and the Abominations reached out for her with their clawed hands, but none could touch her. Annie barely batted an eyelid. The book was littered with runes and symbols which Annie could not understand, and then panic set in. She still couldn’t read! The litany was… useless.</p><p>She gazed up at the shadow of Uldred. Her fingers brushed her enchanted dagger.</p><p>The only way to end the nightmare. There was no beating about the bush, no Alistair to hide behind while Aedan did her dirty work, no Leliana to steal way and finish what they all started.</p><p>As if Uldred could sense her inner conflict, he stepped backwards, away from her as fast as he could backpaddle, and then a man with a grey beard began to scream and writhe in pain on the floor. Annie clutched the book to her chest and scrambled towards him. Blood was leaking from the shadow of his mouth and Anne reached out her hand to his chest. It felt like his blood was vibrating in his veins- blood magic, Annie realised, and she concentrated on isolating him from the electrified room.</p><p>The interference of the blood magic made her task harder; Annie’s skull was on the verge of splitting open, and her vision was darkening, but then the magic suddenly gave way and she was pulling the man into her dimension. Annie gasped for non-existent air and the man spluttered, and he opened his eyes to look at her, and their gazes met for a brief second before his eyelids fluttered close again.</p><p>Uldred screamed in frustration. The abominations were still swiping at her, and hot tears fell from her eyes and landed on the old man’s wrinkled skin. Somebody else was now screaming: Uldred had moved on.</p><p>Annie was trapped. The others were trapped in their dreams, the Templar downstairs was trapped behind that purple curtain, and now her and this random man were stuck in what had been Annie’s sanctuary. She heaved a sob and threw herself down on the stringed ground next to the old man, her hand now clasping his. His fingers were calloused and cold.</p><p>Crawling to the edge of the room and throwing herself threw the wall and into the water below seemed to be the only escape; she could not take on a group of abominations and blood mages by herself, despite her sanctuary. She could forget about this forsaken tower and dive into the lake and swim to shore, then carry onto a port and make her way to Kirkwall, where Hawke and Carver were waiting. Aedan had given her some money to carry and she could sell some of her belongings.</p><p>Then she thought of the others downstairs, and how they were relying on her (even if they did not know it), and she cried harder. Perhaps she would be better off dead.</p><p>A crash resonated throughout the room, and the strings vibrated like musical instruments again. Annie sat up, her back cracking and with snot running from her nostrils. Shapes with swords and daggers and a bow marched into the room. A smile cracked Annie’s dry lips.</p><p>“Annie?” she heard Aedan call out, and another sob wracked her body. With trembling hands, Annie loosened her grip on the litany, until it fell from her grasp and  then she kicked it with all her might until it disappeared. Its shadow slid across the floor and Aedan picked it up.</p><p>Aedan and Uldred were talking, but their voices were warped and distorted, and Annie fell onto her back again, exhaling deeply. Shouts and flashes of magic reverberated off the strings and Annie watched the fireworks display with an almost giddy joy. She turned her head to the side, her eyelids heavy and drooping. The old man’s chest rose and fell in shallow breaths. If she could come out of this nightmare having saved one person, she supposed that would be alright.</p><p>She dared not close her eyes for fear of falling down to the dungeon again. The fight was hard, Annie could tell, and for how long it raged she did not know. Somebody fell through her, and they landed on the floor with a crash, and Annie reached out a hand out of instinct, but the lumbering body was not human, and she withdrew. A huge, demonic creature was crashing around the room with lightning dashing off its shell and Annie closed her eyes. She did not have the stomach for more demonic dealings, and the others were more than capable of bringing it down; Annie had to admit that her sewing needle was not built for more strenuous activity.</p><p>Then the shrieks and clashes and crashes faded. The demonic creature fell to the floor with such force that the strings vibrated like an orchestra. A shadow approached, a hand outstretched, and Annie released the breath she had been holding and all pressure melted away as the world spun and suddenly her hair was being ruffled by the breeze. She fell forwards into a dirty white tunic and she slumped in Anders’ arms. “There! I told you you could do it,” he said proudly, perhaps breathlessly out of exhaustion, and Annie hiccupped a laugh.</p><p>“Irving!” Wynne shouted, and she fell to her knees next to the old man and let her magic do its work.</p><p>“By the Maker,” Aedan gasped, and he knelt next to Annie and pulled her into an embrace which made Annie yelp out of surprise. “When I could not find you in the Fade, I feared the worst.”</p><p>“Well… I’m alive,” Annie told him, and Aedan breathed a sigh of relief.</p><p>Irving spluttered and coughed behind them, and he sat up with a groan, rubbing the back of his head. “Oh Maker… I’m too old for this…”</p><p>“Are you alright?” Wynne worried, and Irving swatted her hands away.</p><p>“Been better… but I am thankful to be alive,” he groaned, and then he looked up at Annie, and a smile crossed his weathered features. “I suppose that is your doing.”</p><p>Annie blinked. “Well, uh, it was the least I could do. Realised I fucked up when I opened the book and couldn’t read a bloody word of it.”</p><p>The party fell silent, and shock crossed Wynne’s elegant face, but then Irving laughed and coughed again. “The Circle owes all of you a debt we will never be able to repay,” he said in his gravelly voice, and Annie felt Anders’ fingers tighten on her arm.   </p><p>“It was but our duty, First Enchanter,” Aedan said with a smile. Morrigan sniffed and wandered away to poke at the abomination corpses with her staff. Alistair was already lying down on the floor, hands clasped over his chest like an ancient mummy.</p><p>“Let us heal our friends, Anders,” Wynne softly ordered to the mage. Anders exchanged a look with Annie and she narrowed her eyes. Friends indeed.</p><p>The door swung open again and the Templar from downstairs burst into the room, his sword drawn. “Mages yet remain!” he shouted at Aedan, who leapt to his feet to intercept him.</p><p>“Cullen! Cullen! They’re fine!” he shouted, and he clasped the poor man by his shoulders and shook him. Alistair joined his fellow warden and clasped the back of Cullen’s head, forcing the man to look at him. Cullen was shaking with rage.</p><p>“The Circle is fine. Uldred is dead, along with all the other demons and abominations. It is safe," Alistair implored the man.</p><p>“Safe? Safe!” Cullen exclaimed in a high-pitched voice, “they’ll turn on you and trap you again!”</p><p>“Like you trapped us?” Anders asked sarcastically, and Wynne swatted his arm in scorn.</p><p>Cullen’s nostrils flared and he turned to Aedan. “I implore you to consider the consequences of your mercy,” he hissed, and a shiver ran down Annie’s back. Aedan stared back at him.</p><p>“I have made my decision. Innocents deserve to live,” he replied. Cullen looked at him, nodded slowly, then sheathed his sword.</p><p>“I see. I shall alert the Knight-Commander of your… success,” he said, then he turned on his heel with shaky legs and left the room. Annie watched the man stumble through the door, past the mutilated corpses of his friends pinned to the wall, and she found that she felt almost sorry for him.</p><hr/><p>Annie was startled awake by raised voices and the remnants of a nightmare of a muddy field soaked in blood. She had fallen asleep on a pile of blankets near the tower entrance; by the way her muscles and bones ached, she might as well have launched herself off the top of the tower rather than clamber down all those flights of stairs. She rubbed her bleary eyes and yawned. Leliana was sat next to her, oiling her bow string. “What are they arguing about?” Annie asked the redhead, tilting her head towards Aedan and Greagoir.</p><p>“They are arguing about Anders,” Leliana replied nonchalantly.</p><p>“Anders?” Annie echoed. She clambered to her feet, cracking her sore back, and walked to where the Knight-Commander and Grey Warden were butting heads. Anders was leaning against a pillar, looking somewhat disinterested. “What happened to your great escape?” Annie asked him.</p><p>“I got side-tracked by a Sloth demon. Then a frail young Grey Warden who needed help down the stairs,” he replied with a smile. Annie scowled at him.</p><p>“You could have left me.”</p><p>Anders shrugged. “Didn’t feel right.”</p><p>“Anders,” Aedan called softly, and the mage heaved a sigh before joining the warden. Annie watched from afar. “The Knight-Commander says you will need be put back into solitary confinement to complete your sentence-”</p><p>“How unnecessarily cruel!” Wynne interrupted, and Aedan shot her a pleading look. The mage threw her hands in the air and walked away, shaking her head.</p><p>“… but I may be able to offer a different solution,” Aedan continued. Anders raised an eyebrow.</p><p>“You don’t mean…”</p><p>“Yes. I do mean.”</p><p>“So I swap one prison for another?” Anders asked, and he gave a desperate laugh.</p><p>“I am sorry, Anders,” Aedan offered.</p><p>Anders turned and seemed to survey the room; his eyes danced over the torn curtains, the smashed vases, the bloodstains on the floor. “Very well. It seems I have no other choice,” Anders relented. His bony shoulders sagged underneath his dirty tunic. Aedan clapped him on the shoulder, and Annie half-expected the man to shatter like a glass mirror.</p><p>“I shall need my robes,” Anders told Greagoir, and the Knight-Commander’s lip twitched, and he ordered a templar to fetch Anders’ belongings.</p><p>They left Kinloch Hold without much celebration. Aedan had secured Irving’s promise of aid, and had succeeded in recruiting two healers into their little merry band. “I’m sorry about what happened,” Annie whispered to Anders, who was watching the tower with a strange look on his face which Annie couldn’t quite place.</p><p>“Don’t be. Out of everyone here, I feel you are the least responsible for whatever… happened,” he replied quietly. Annie tried to smile at him, but the gesture felt empty, and she cast her gaze across the lake and at the grey, dreary sky. The rest of the short journey back to shore was silent, with nothing but the creak of oars and splashing of water.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. the road to redcliffe</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>tw: gore, brief mentions of suicide, self-esteem issues</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“So you had to fight demons and spirits while you were dreaming-”</p><p>“And you woke up, by yourself, and fell through the floor-”</p><p>“… and you had to free everyone else-”</p><p>“… and you shattered your back…” Aedan held up a finger, interrupting Annie’s next point, “… and snuck past the Sloth demon with the litany and tried to defeat Uldred <em>by yourself</em>?”</p><p>Annie shrugged her shoulders and grinned. Aedan shook his head and laughed, throwing back his head and smiling so widely that Annie glimpsed a chipped canine. Annie had never seen him laugh like that before, and joy suited him well, Annie thought, as she watched him smile. He scratched at some dried blood spattered on his neck and Annie’s smile faltered. “It took me a while to stop crying and actually get there though,” she said quietly, and she hugged her knees to her chest. The room felt cold again. Aedan smiled sympathetically, then patted her on the knee.</p><p>“Understandably.”</p><p>“I didn’t even kill anything up there,” she murmured. She had been in a room full of abominations and she didn’t even kill <em>one. </em>If Aedan and the others hadn’t burst in when they did, or hadn’t woken up <em>at all, </em>she would have already swum out into Lake Calenhad with a pocketful of rocks, Kirkwall be damned. Annie shuddered at the thought and gripped her mug tighter.</p><p>“But you did save them,” Aedan replied, sipping on his tea. Annie smiled and let the blazing fire warm her face. They had stumbled into the inn, dried blood still splattered on their clothes, and Aedan had slammed a coinpurse down onto the bar and bought three rooms for the night.</p><p>“I thought we were poor,” Annie had whispered to him, and Aedan had replied with a cheeky wink.</p><p>“Courtesy of our Templar friends,” he had said.</p><p>As they waited for the run-down rooms to be readied, they sat by the fire in the common area, nursing teas. Alistair had wandered off to find someone to repair some of his armour while Leliana and Morrigan had gone to buy more supplies. Wynne was napping in a well-loved armchair and Anders was sat cross legged in front of the fire, staring morosely into the flames.</p><p>“I suppose I did help… a little bit,” Annie relented. Even saying it aloud made her feel a little giddy, and Aedan shared her growing grin. “Maybe it makes up for what happened to Alistair.”</p><p>Aedan scoffed and set his tea down on the chairside table. “I assure you that Alistair thought nothing of it.”</p><p>“But… he’s been avoiding me all week. I thought I pissed him off…” she said.</p><p>“I think he’s fighting a lot of… pre-conceived notions, Annie. He was raised in the Chantry and taught to fear any sort of magic… and you did just tell us that you were from another world,” Aedan countered. Annie sunk lower into her chair. She had not considered the man’s ideology being ripped apart by her mere presence, less than a week after his father figure’s violent death. She cast her gaze downwards, her cheeks warming in embarrassment.</p><p>Anders coughed beside the fire, snapping Annie out of her shameful revelation. “Another world?” the mage asked lowly, and the firelight cast his gaunt face in deep shadows, making his worried expression appear cartoon-like. Aedan visibly blanched; his diplomatic and intuitive façade slipped off his face like a mask, and Annie shot him a dark look, yet he had the decency to look somewhat apologetic, despite his own shock. Annie then looked at Wynne, whose eyelids were fluttering ever so slightly. She heaved a sigh.</p><p>“About six weeks ago I was innocently enjoying a little shopping trip when someone smashed a crystal orb and I woke up in the Korcari Wilds,” she began to explain, tiredly. Annie curled up tighter in her armchair. “I had never heard of a Thedas or seen magic or elves or dwarves.”</p><p>Anders stared at her, his expression blank and unreadable, then he raised his eyebrows and turned back to the fire. “Sounds rather traumatic,” was all he said, and Annie laughed, exhaling far more breath than usual to unload her relief.</p><p>“Not as traumatic as last night, I’ll tell you. When I get back home, I’m booking myself straight into therapy,” she added, her smile becoming ever-so slightly forced, and she grit her teeth as fleshy sacs and burned skeletons flitted through her mind like pages of an old flipbook. Blinking violently, her eyes burned as multicoloured lines wriggled across her vision, and her head felt heavy on her neck, as if Ander’s reconstruction of her spine had suddenly shattered again.</p><p>“Hmmm,” Aedan agreed, as he stared blankly at the wall behind Wynne.</p><p>“Anyways, I’m glad you don’t seem too… weirded out by it. Alistair is still avoiding me. Leliana doesn’t seem to care,” Annie continued, her voice trailing off, as she suddenly recalled the smell of his sweat while he had held her up and sat next to her by the fire. She blushed again, thankful that nobody could read her mind.</p><p>“Leliana knows?” Aedan asked. Whether he was oblivious to Annie’s pink cheeks or merely abstained from commenting on it, Annie could not tell, but she was endlessly grateful for his apparent disinterest.</p><p>“Of course she knows,” Annie replied, pulling a face. “She’s not the one running away from me all the time. Maybe he just doesn’t like me,” she mumbled, fighting the tears that pricked at her eyes. She hated being disliked.</p><p>“Some people need time, Annie. You forget that Alistair is awkward at his best,” he said fondly, and Annie recalled the other man’s fumbling and blushing with Leliana. That stung a little bit, Annie had to admit, and did not make her feel much better about herself.</p><p>“So… you and Alistair have made up now?” Annie asked Aedan, diverting the subject before her mind could tumble down that slippery, dark hole.</p><p>“It was never an argument… merely a disagreement,” he replied, stretching his arms above his head with a satisfying crack. “Alistair is a strong warrior but perhaps naïve.”</p><p>“Don’t think yourself immune, Aedan,” Wynne chided from her armchair, awaking from her apparent nap.</p><p>“I was right though. If we had gone to Redcliffe first, the Circle would have likely fallen,” Aedan responded, and there was almost a hint of glee in his voice. Annie rolled her eyes.</p><p>“Perhaps,” Wynne replied, her own tone somewhat disinterested, and Annie smiled when she caught Aedan bristling at the older woman’s refusal to rise to his game.</p><p>“Nevertheless, we shall begin the journey to Redcliffe on the morrow. Leliana is arranging a boat as we speak,” he told them evenly, as if to convince them of his authority again. At least that meant no more hiking, Annie conceded, though every long boat trip that she had ever undertaken had ended with her hunched over the side, emptying her stomach into the waves below. Aedan stood from his chair, brushing down his leathers, and went off to find a privy.</p><p>Anders was still staring into the fire, a blanket draped around his thin shoulders. Annie settled herself next to him on the threadbare rug. “Another world, eh?” he asked her brightly, though his brown eyes remained fixed on the flames.</p><p>“Yeah,” Annie replied, sighing softly. “Nobody hikes anywhere. We don’t build fires. We don’t hunt for food. Machines do all that.”</p><p>“Hmmm.”</p><p>“We have better food. Amazing food. Sweet and spicy and sour and huge portions. Everybody goes to school. We can travel, too, thousands of leagues in one day to see far-off places,” Annie continued, her voice wistful. The blazing fire was starting to dry out her skin, Annie knew, but somehow it seemed… natural. Tangible. Though she now how to save her moisturiser for extra special occasions (i.e., after scrubbing her face with soap to rid her skin of dried blood), Annie found that she was starting to enjoy sitting by a fire. </p><p>“But no magic?” Anders asked.</p><p>“No magic,” Annie confirmed, and the mage seemed disappointed, and he grasped a thread from the rug and pulled it out. “But we have music, instead. I think our music is our magic. You’ll like Dua Lipa, I think. And a good club.”</p><p>“Like a billiards club?”</p><p>“What? No! Imagine a dark room with flashing lights and music so loud it rings in your ears hours later. People wearing very small clothes and vomiting from drunkenness,” Annie explained; she could almost hear the bass pumping in her eardrums, her friends’ drunken singing, and taste the sharpness of vodka on her tongue. Her heart clenched in an invisible fist and she regretted starting this conversation.</p><p>“Maybe one day you can take me to one. It’ll be far enough from the Templars, anyway,” Anders said, and she heard the smile in his voice, and she felt warm again, just a little, and her heart unclenched.</p><p>“Rooms are ready,” Aedan announced suddenly, and Annie looked up to see him swinging his rucksack over his shoulder. “Sten and Morrigan have declined rooms, which leaves the six of us. I do not mind sleeping on the floor if needs be-” Aedan started, then Wynne tutted him.</p><p>“You need proper rest, dear. Doctor’s orders.”</p><p>Though Aedan was no fan of being argued with, a ghost of a smile crept across his face. “Very well. I will share with Alistair,” he said, and Annie caught his eyes and he raised an eyebrow at her. Annie laughed; Alistair was probably not the best candidate to share a bed with mages, presumed abominations, and impossibly beautiful Orlesians. Annie supposed that she could share with Leliana, much like she had done in the past week, but one look at Anders’ apprehensive face confirmed her suspicions.</p><p>“I don’t mind who I share with,” Annie started, “but if Wynne and Leliana want to share, I’m more than happy to take a room with Anders.”</p><p>Wynne narrowed her eyes at the other healer, who threw his arms up in mock defence. “You must know that Anders’ reputation precedes him. Annie is too young for you, Anders.”</p><p>Anders laughed and Annie felt her cheeks heat up as she flushed bright red. “That’s not what-”</p><p>“I know, dear,” Wynne said softly, and the older mage chuckled. “Now, I must take some rest before we eat,” she announced, then turned her back to leave. Annie watched her go, eyes narrowed; the older woman’s feigned ignorance of Annie’s newly revealed origins gave Aedan’s poker face a run for his money.</p><p>“Uhm, okay then. I’m gonna go nap as well,” Annie said stiffly, and she knew that her cheeks were still tomato red. Anders grinned.</p><p>“Not a bad idea, I say. I’ll ask for a bath to be drawn,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows. Annie looked him up and down.</p><p>“You need one,” she drawled, considering his matted hair and dirty face, and the mage laughed again.</p><p>“I would say that you need one too, princess, but you seem to have avoided all the blood,” Anders responded, and they began to walk up the uneven, winding, wooden staircase.</p><p>“Makes the nausea worth it, I suppose,” Annie mumbled.</p><p>They climbed the creaky old stairs with aching knees. The hallway was dark and musty, with iron lamps welded onto the walls that were coated with wispy cobwebs. Anders unlocked the stiff door and pushed it open with his shoulder, grunting. A fire was blazing in the old iron fireplace, and the double bed was high off the ground and piled with furs. Annie untied her boots, her spine cracking as she bent down, and then flopped onto the bed with a sigh. A faint cloud of dust bounced into the air and she sneezed.</p><p>The mattress then bounced again, and she turned her head to see Anders facing the canopy with his eyes closed, his long nose pointing upwards like an arrow. “I could fall asleep right now,” he murmured.</p><p>“Not before you bathe, please,” Annie said sharply, her nose wrinkling.</p><p>“Fine, fine,” he mumbled, and then he turned onto his stomach to press his scruffy cheek against the fur. He breathed in deeply, scrunched his nose, then sneezed as well.</p><p>“Does it feel good to be out of there?” she asked him quietly. The deep worry lines on his grimy forehead seemed to be fading, and when he opened his amber eyes, she averted his gaze with a blush. She stared at the dusty canopy above the bed, her eyes tracing the faded swirls in the fabric, avoiding looking at him.</p><p>“A little,” he replied, “though I cannot say this is how I envisioned my freedom.”</p><p>“If it’s any consolation, this isn’t how I imagined my life, either.”</p><p>“Hmph,” Anders added, and it sounded almost like a laugh. The door creaked open and the innkeeper and another worker dragged a tin bathtub into the room, and its feet scraped horribly on the uneven floorboards, making Annie wince.</p><p>“No need to heat the water up,” Anders piped up, and the innkeeper looked at him warily, frowned, then nodded his head. Once the tub was full of water, Anders dipped his bony hand in, closing his eyes, until steam began to rise from the surface. “You can go first,” he said, “you’re much less dirty than I am.”</p><p>Annie blinked at him. “You sure?”</p><p>“I’ve waited almost a month; I can wait a little more. I promise I won’t look,” he said, a kind smile on his face. Annie nodded and almost tripped in the furs as she leapt from the bed; she hadn’t bathed in hot water for almost two weeks now. Anders, true to his word, wandered down the hall to badger Aedan. Annie eased herself into the tub, her toes and fingers burning until they turned numb, and sunk low into the water.</p><p>Bruises mottled her skin in blues and purples and yellows. The silvery scar on her leg twitched and the skin was still red and new, and if she focused on it too much, pain like a static shock rushed up the nerves in her leg and she spasmed, splashing droplets of water onto the floor.</p><p>A knock sounded on the door, snapping Annie out of her reverie, and she cleared her throat. “Who is it?” she called out.</p><p>“It’s, uhm, Alistair.” His voice was muffled and quiet, but Annie still felt her insides seize up like someone had grasped them in their hand and pulled.</p><p>“Oh, uhm, I’m just in the bath right now, give me two seconds-”</p><p>“No! Don’t worry! I, uh, just picked something up that- that you might like. It can wait,” he replied quickly, and his heavy footsteps faded away before she could reply. She sank back into the hot water, eyebrows pulled into a frown. She settled her neck against the cold metal rim and looked up at the dusty wooden ceiling, watching the steam curl into the air. She suddenly felt very lightheaded.</p><p>“This bath is too hot,” she grumbled, squeezing her eyelids so tightly shut that colours burst like fireworks in the dark.</p><hr/><p>Dinner was a strange affair. The past week had been hurried mouthfuls of bread, cheese, tomatoes, and spit-roasted hare taken before the night became too cold to sit outside. Sten and Morrigan always ate separately, if at all, leaving the three Wardens and Leliana to dine in somewhat awkward silence. Annie had found herself disappointed each time Morrigan stalked into the night with not so much as a goodnight.</p><p>In the inn, however, Aedan was in high spirits, and his joy was infectious. Alistair was already on his second serving of stew when Annie came down the creaky staircase with wet hair, and he looked up at her and spluttered around his spoon, blushing. Aedan clapped him on the back, laughing.   </p><p>Anders sauntered down, freshly shaved with washed hair. He looked much less like a walking corpse, at least, and he sat down next to her with a groan. “Unknown brown stew? My favourite!” he exclaimed. Annie wrinkled her nose and passed him a cracked bowl of the goop. She had opted for the sickman’s soup instead, after pushing the grisly chunks of meat around her bowl for a quarter of an hour. It could have done with some paprika or chili flakes, but the caramelised onions and fresh bread were a nice touch.</p><p>“To surviving,” Aedan announced, holding his tin mug of ale in the air.</p><p>“Surviving,” Annie murmured, clinking her mug to the others’. They had been lucky that their ragtag group had come out unscathed. Silence descended on the table as they sat and ate, deep in thought. Annie was both starving and uninterested in her soup. She felt like she had the flu.</p><p>“We did well today, given the circumstances,” Aedan announced whilst pouring more ale into his mug. The brown liquid sloshed against the sides and threatened to spill over the lip. Why did everything have to be brown in Thedas?</p><p>“Indeed,” Leliana agreed.</p><p>Aedan turned to look at Annie, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “You’re awfully quiet about the food, Annie. Everything alright?”</p><p>She smiled weakly. “The soup’s pretty good, actually,” she replied, and Aedan nodded. Leliana then engaged him in a conversation about some petty aspect of Orlesian politics, and Annie felt her gaze wander to a spot just beyond Alistair’s shoulder, lost in thoughts of purple walls and dripping ceilings.</p><hr/><p>The sound of someone clearing their throat startled Annie awake. Blinking in the low light, Annie opened her eyes to see Alistair standing beside her, looking bashful. Leliana was still plucking at the strings on her lute, singing softly, with Aedan and Potato lying together at her feet.</p><p>“I, uh, went to the armourer and he had some other things to trade. I saw this and he said he would give it to me free of charge since we helped out at the tower,” he said quietly, and he held out his large hand. He opened his palm, and Annie glimpsed a wooden stick with short, scratchy bristles.</p><p>“A toothbrush?” she asked in an embarrassingly squeaky voice, and she looked up at the warrior, who had a bright smile stretched across his face.</p><p>“All the way from Antiva, apparently. I know you lost your old one and I don’t want you to be upset about your teeth anymore,” he explained, and Annie blushed furiously, though she had to admit that she’d had more than one public breakdown over her dental hygiene. “You have nice teeth,” he added quietly, and then he cleared his throat awkwardly as Annie’s blush deepened.</p><p>“Thank you, Alistair. Hopefully I’ll stop crying about my teeth now,” she said softly, and biting her lip and mustering up her courage like she had done so in front of that eerie, small door at the top of the tower, she leapt to her feet, dizzy, and threw her arms around his torso.</p><p>Alistair flinched in surprise, then he laughed, and cautiously rested his arms behind her back, patting her shoulder. His chest, free of armour, was warm and solid. Though he had bathed, his own musk still crept up her nostrils, and Annie smiled. As quickly as she had latched onto him, she pulled away. Pink dusted the man’s cheeks.</p><p>“And please don’t start crying about other things now, there is absolutely nothing wrong with your nose or skin or chin… you’re… lovely,” he continued, and Annie felt her blood run cold. He had been watching her, then, as she picked at her skin and stared at her reflection in any body of water she had come across, running a finger down her slightly crooked nose and along her soft jawline.</p><p>“I’ll try not to,” she whispered, her voice wobbling with the threat of tears, then Alistair nodded, and bid her a goodnight, then he scampered away again like he had done so many times before. Someone cleared their throat, and Annie snapped her head to the side to see Morrigan's golden eyes flashing in the low firelight, and though the witch feigned disgust, Annie smiled to herself as she climbed the creaky stairs, her hand clutching the gift so tightly that her fingernails dug uncomfortably into her palm.</p><p>However, even with fresh breath, sleep did not come easy when Annie crawled under the heavy furs. Though she had always struggled with bouts of insomnia due to exam stress or drinking or anxiousness, sleeplessness in Thedas was a different kettle of fish entirely; she could not help the sinking feeling in her chest nor the erratic beating of her heart whenever she found herself in a cold darkness, when the ground would start to feel like thick mud; nor could she help the feeling of falling from the sky when her muscles remembered powering up that slippery slope as fires glowed in the distance. She could not bear to think of that night nor the day that had just transpired as she stared out into the dark room, gazing at the pale moonlight illuminating the surface of a vanity.</p><p>Surviving. Mugs of ale clinking. Laughter. Burnt corpses. Red mud. <em>You seem pretty talented at that</em>, Alistair had told her a lifetime ago in Lothering. She could not fight nor heal nor charm people with her words; she could not fashion arrows nor brew healing potions. Perhaps she would sleep easier if she could do anything more than cook vegetable soup, walk through walls, and get people shot full of arrows. Tossing onto her side, she wondered if Cullen and Irving and Greagoir were facing the same dark night, trying to sleep in a tower with corpses still pinned to the walls.</p><p>Anders drew in a shuddery breath beside her. Annie rolled onto her back and sighed. Perhaps Aedan had the right idea, she thought darkly, her mind casting back to the five mugs of ale that he had poured himself before sprawling on the carpet with his dog, falling asleep peacefully with his fingers tangled in the Mabari’s fur.</p><p>Perhaps she would wake up in Anders’ cell again, or beside Cullen’s purple prison, or in the mud, lying in a cold, dark valley.</p><p>
  <em>He called me lovely.</em>
</p><hr/><p>Annie stood behind Anders as they watched the Tower drift beyond the horizon. His long, dark blond hair whipped around his face in the wind, and Annie’s cheeks stung in the cold air. Unsure of what to say to him, Annie lingered awkwardly, but she nevertheless found herself studying his hooked nose and strong chin. She swallowed the lump in her throat, searching for something to say, until he suddenly opened his mouth to speak.</p><p>“Definitely better than swimming,” he said, and when he turned his head to look at her, he was smiling. Annie smiled back.</p><p>“Much better,” Wynne agreed. The older woman joined them, her own grey hair staying put in its tight bun. She had been at Ostagar, apparently, so Annie supposed this was nothing new to the Senior Enchanter. Annie wondered if Anders resented her for it.</p><p>Above them, gulls began to squawk and dive for fish in the water. A dark crow descended from the sky until Morrigan suddenly appeared behind them. Annie could tell it was the witch by her soft, calculative footsteps on the boards of the ship. The witch made no quip as she stood behind the trio, far away enough as to not volunteer herself in any conversation, but close enough to make her presence known. At the front of the ship, Aedan, Alistair and Leliana were laughing and chatting to each other about something Annie’s ears couldn’t catch.</p><p>Annie narrowed her eyes and watched as a pair of Templars tossed yet another body onto an awaiting boat, the other trio’s giggles and laughs drifting on the wind. Anders turned his back on the tower without a word. Wynne reached for his broad shoulder, and when her strong hands gently squeezed the feathered pauldron of his robe, Annie swore he leaned into her touch, and his eyes fluttered shut.</p><p>“Was it ever home?” Annie asked them.</p><p>“As much as I had ever known,” Anders replied simply.</p><p>“The people were my home,” Wynne replied wistfully, a small smile on her lips, her mind no doubt casting back to happier times. She gave Anders’ shoulder one final squeeze before she left to join the others. A whoosh of air let Annie know that Morrigan had taken off again; as her eyes followed the black shape soaring into the sky, Annie wondered if Morrigan missed her home in the Korcari Wilds. For a brief moment in time, it had been hers, too.</p><p>Annie leant her temple against Anders’ shoulder, her nose scrunching at the tickly feathers. The laughter was now drowned out by the whistling of the wind, and the two stood in silence, listening to Sten sharpening his sword.</p><hr/><p>As they neared Redcliffe in the late evening, just as the sky was beginning to turn orange and the birds were settling down, a shrill voice cut through the chilled air. “Help!” a woman screamed, and Annie jumped in surprise. Aedan and Alistair had already rushed to the side of the boat, and she screamed for help again.</p><p>“Bandits,” Aedan seethed, “bring the boat ashore!”</p><p>Morrigan landed on the decks and Annie flinched again. She was definitely going to develop some sort of heart condition here. The witch twirled her staff in one pale hand, her golden eyes narrowed at the woman on the shore, who was now begging and pleading. “Tis an ambush,” she said simply, and Aedan clenched his jaw.</p><p>“Did you scout it?”</p><p>“Aye,” Morrigan replied, “the usual broken wagons and screaming women, with some added trip wires and crossbowmen.”</p><p>Aedan glanced at the woman again, who was now waving her arms in the air. “And you would advise we continue our course?” he asked Morrigan, who nodded. Annie glanced to Anders and Sten, who looked very disinterested in the whole matter. The Qunari was polishing some pauldrons whilst the mage laid on his back on the deck, his arm flung over his eyes.</p><p>“We should help eradicate these bandits nonetheless,” Leliana hissed to Aedan, “so that other less fortunate travellers do not come to harm.”</p><p>Alistair was already strapping his shield onto his arm, and Wynne stood from her seat. Morrigan rolled her eyes, as if Aedan had already told her his decision. “Very well then,” she said coldly, and she transformed into a crow once more and took to the sky. Pulling a face, Annie looked away from the witch’s strange contortions and braced herself against the side of the boat, feeling nausea roll in her stomach. With the way Annie’s muscles still ached from the Circle Tower, she was very much inclined to agree with the witch.</p><p>The boat came to shore, crushing the long, wispy reeds at the water’s edge. Wynne remained on the boat to look after the luggage and to keep an eye on the captain, who looked as if he were about to shit his trousers at any moment. Aedan leapt over the boat’s side and splashed into the shallow water, daggers already drawn. Leliana, Sten and Alistair followed him with no complaints. Potato bounded happily after his master, spraying rancid lake water into every direction, and Annie closed her eyes against the flying droplets. Looking none too pleased, Anders eased himself down from the boat and gasped at the water coming to his knees.</p><p>“Cold?” Annie asked, and he nodded his head violently.</p><p>“And smelly,” he said with a scrunch of his nose. He held out his arms and Annie raised an eyebrow. “Come on princess, it’ll save you getting your feet wet!” he shouted.</p><p>“You’re just going to drop me and then all of me will be wet,” Annie drawled. Not that she didn’t trust Anders with her life, but somehow she knew that he would think it funny to inconvenience her.</p><p>“Come on. The others will be waiting for us,” he said playfully, and Annie looked over to see Aedan speaking with the crazy woman, who was gesturing wildly down the dirt path. Annie heaved a sigh and pulled herself up to the side of the boat, standing and wobbling on the edge. Anders cracked a grin and slid an arm just below her knees, and then he was suddenly lifting her off the boat and slushing his way to land.</p><p>“Be careful!” Annie shrieked as he jostled her into a less precarious lift, so that his arms were under her knees and back. Annie clung to him, her eyes squeezed shut, but he only laughed as he trudged to shore. Aedan waved them over impatiently, but he was smiling, Annie realised, and when Anders set her on the dry ground, she supposed she would have to make it up to him, somehow. The mage ruffled her hair as he passed by, and she swatted his arm.</p><p>Since the woman had already seen the entire party approach, Aedan thought it best to feign ignorance. He led the party with Sten and Alistair by his side, while Leliana, Anders and Annie made up the rear. Annie thumbed the crystal at her neck with shaking fingers as the woman led them further away from shore. They came across some sort of junction in the road, where broken wagons were strewn about randomly, and with two paths leading to higher ground. The woman approached a tanned elven man with long blond hair, and she smiled at him knowingly, then took off. Aedan stifled a laugh.</p><p>The elven man raised his hand in the air and made some sort of signal, then crossbow men in rough leathers slinked out from between the trees and circled them. A crack resounded in the air, and then Aedan casually took a step to the side as a tree trunk came crashing to the ground. Annie gulped. “The Grey Wardens die here!” the elf shouted, and there was a lilt to his voice as if he were foreign, but Annie could not dwell on that thought for long before he drew two wicked looking daggers and the crossbowmen nocked their bolts.</p><p>Anders threw up a blue defensive barrier and the crossbow bolts bounced off them like ping-pong balls. With bellowing cries that made Annie’s arm hair stand on end, Sten and Alistair rushed forwards to engage the bandits, and Aedan and Leliana disappeared into the edges of the fray. Potato darted about wildly, frothing at the mouth, as he latched onto legs and arms.</p><p>“No walls to walk through here, eh?” Anders bantered with a wink, and Annie grinned.</p><p>“Guess I’ll just hang about, then,” she said, and though she tried to match his light tone, she could not help the twisting of her gut as she watched Sten decapitate one of the bandits. Before she could focus her mind, she felt someone press something cold into her hand, and when she turned to see who it was, she only caught a glimpse of Aedan’s brown hair disappear behind a wagon. She looked down at her palm to see a pair of scissors glinting in the golden sunset.</p><p>The yellow light intensified until it felt as though she were looking at a world made of hanging golden chains, and for a split second she was back in that antique shop, phone in hand to pay for her glasses. Annie crept forwards, coming across a tripwire strung between two barrels of oil, and she knelt to cut it. She was only in the physical plane for a split second, but she felt something whoosh by her, and when she glanced down at her chest, a long dagger had passed through her invisible back and through her heart. Spooked, Annie gulped and craned her neck to look at her almost-assassin; the blond elf stood behind her, mouth agape, before his shadow took off running. He was fast, Annie conceded, and she wiped a bead of cold sweat from her brow.</p><p>On wobbly legs, Annie circled round the clearing, cutting wires as she went. A crossbowman came running up one of the slopes and aimed at Anders, who was busy casting rejuvenation spells over the party. Without thinking, Annie kicked one of the oil barrels and watched it tumble down the small hill, taking out the crossbowman, who yelped in surprise. Though everyone seemed to just step over the wires anyway, Annie busied herself with the task just so she could say that she had done something, at least. She snipped the last wire and stood up with her hands on her hips, proud of her handiwork, before two dark shapes came crashing down the slope and right through where the wire had been not one second ago.</p><p>Frowning, Annie turned to see the unmistakable tall and broad shadow of Alistair scramble above one of the bandits and land a nasty punch to the man’s face. Even through the distortion of the fourth dimension, Annie winced at the loud crack. Alistair clambered to his feet and speared the man through the chest with his sword. Annie looked away.</p><p>A shadow of a bird soared into Annie’s field of vision and morphed into the slender figure of Morrigan. Assured that it was now safe, Annie let herself fall on her backside as the world became duller and colder. The wind stung at her red cheeks. Aedan and Alistair were towering over the slumped body of the blond elf in the middle of the clearing. Leliana was visiting each corpse and ridding them of their valuables and the arrows buried in their flesh, Potato trailing after her with his tongue lolling out of his mouth.</p><p>Anders stood beside the two Wardens, and Annie realised that Aedan had not already gone through his pockets, meaning that the man was probably still alive, and they were waiting to question him. Annie stood up, groaning at her knees cracking, and joined her fellow Wardens. The elf was rather handsome, with golden brown skin, a straight nose, and full lips. Annie cocked her head to the side as he suddenly spluttered a cough and woke up, his hand drifting to his side, where a dark bloodstain was spreading. He looked up at them, a sheepish smile on his face, and Annie felt her cheeks warm again.</p><p>“I rather thought I would wake up dead. Or not wake up at all, as the case may be. But I see you haven’t killed me yet,” he said in his lilted accent, and Annie glanced at Aedan, who had a rather bemused expression on his face. The elf sat up, on his knees, and looked up at their leader. “Let me get right to the point. My name is Zevran. Zev to my friends. I am a member of the Antivan crows, sent here for the sole purpose of slaying any surviving Grey Wardens. Which I have failed at, sadly.”</p><p>“I’m rather glad you failed,” Aedan drawled, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>“So would I be, in your shoes. For me, however, it sets a rather poor precedent, doesn’t it? Getting captured by a target seems a tad detrimental to one’s budding assassin career,” Zevran replied, grinning flirtatiously. Aedan seemed to be enjoying this.</p><p>“Too bad for you, then.”</p><p>“Yes, too bad for me,” Zevran added. Alistair shifted his weight awkwardly from foot to foot. Anders raised an eyebrow. Aedan crouched down so that he was almost eye-level with the man, unsheathing a knife from his leg and pointing it idly at the elf, who looked at the blade with an almost gleeful smile.</p><p>“Who hired you?” Aedan asked sweetly as he twiddled the blade between his thumb and forefinger.</p><p>“A rather taciturn fellow in the capital. Loghain, I think his name was? Yes, that’s it,” Zevran answered easily. Aedan hummed in thought.</p><p>“He’s getting desperate,” said Alistair.</p><p>“And now that you’ve failed?” Aedan asked, unsurprised at Loghain’s involvement.</p><p>“Well, that’s between Loghain and the Crows. And between the Crows and myself.”</p><p>Aedan looked down the edge of his blade, then got to his feet, considering Zevran with his steely gaze. The elf did not cower; in fact, he looked rather pleased with himself. “So now, I assume, your life is forfeit- either the Crows kill you, or I do. What would you prefer?”</p><p>Zevran laughed, and it was deep and throaty. “Thing is, I like living. And you are obviously the sort to give the Crows pause, so why don’t I serve you instead?”</p><p>Annie’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. This assassin had balls. Aedan laughed, showing off his chipped tooth again. “So you can slit our throats in our sleep?” he asked in mirth.</p><p>“Ah, why would I murder such a beautiful group of warriors? Besides, I do not like being expected to die for failing, nor live out the rest of my life in enforced servitude. I would rather take my chances with you,” Zevran explained, and his playful tone faded, and he almost looked… sad. Exhausted. Annie rolled her shoulders and cracked her neck.</p><p>“We are serving an Order sworn to protect Thedas from the Blight, no matter the cost. Are you prepared to join us on that?” Aedan asked him, suddenly serious, and Annie glimpsed Anders stiffen and flex his fingers round his staff.</p><p>“Ah, how exciting! A mission to save the world!” Zevran exclaimed in glee, then he spluttered a cough and groaned, his tanned hand cradling his side. Annie was too flabbergasted to protest.</p><p>“You can’t be serious,” Alistair hissed through gritted teeth. Aedan shrugged his shoulders, grinning.</p><p>“He’ll be useful. Besides, I could tell his heart wasn’t in it,” Aedan explained, “my mother told me about the Crows, about how they buy children born into slavery, and train them in the art of killing. I cannot blame him for wanting to break free. We’ll continue to be pursued by Loghain, anyhow. Zevran could kill us, but the principle of success remains. The Crows will kill him even if he succeeds the next time…” Aedan trailed off, then he held out a blood-stained hand to the elf, who smiled and took it. Aedan pulled him up.</p><p>“Sexy and observant, I see,” Zevran quipped, and Annie felt herself smile, despite her apprehension. Zevran was funny, at least, and not bad to look at.</p><p>“I see,” Alistair murmured, and he made no further comment.</p><p>“A fine plan! Though I would inspect your drink and meals very closely, from now on,” Morrigan mocked, and she wandered away back the way they came, ignoring Zevran’s witty reply.</p><p>“This is folly,” Sten said simply, his eyes flashing. “He will attack again. And when he does, I’ll crush his skull.”</p><p>Zevran laughed nervously, his dark eyes scanning the qunari’s massive stature. “That I am sure of, my friend.”</p><p>“Hmph,” Sten returned, then he turned to follow Morrigan, Potato trotting next to him.</p><p>The sun was now disappearing beyond the tree line, casting long shadows across the dusty ground. Annie overheard Leliana welcoming Zevran to their group, who replied with some joke about loneliness. As Annie joined Aedan’s side, Zevran turned to her and looked her up and down, and she shrunk under his intense gaze.</p><p>“And to think that you hid such a lovely face!” he flirted, his mouth stretching into a wide grin, and Annie blushed crimson. Then he reached toward her suddenly, and her blood ran cold, and she could hardly process what was going on before an armoured fist intercepted and grabbed onto Zevran’s tanned arm, then her vision was blocked by Aedan’s broad back.</p><p>“Don’t-” she heard Alistair say when her hearing zoned in again. Her heart was thumping in her chest and she exhaled a deep breath.</p><p>“I merely wanted to see if she was real! But I see how it is,” Zevran explained, and he sounded amused by it all, then he withdrew his arm from Alistair's grip and dipped into a low, sweeping bow. “My apologies.”</p><p>“I’ve given you a second chance, Zevran. Don’t make me regret it,” Aedan warned, his tone no longer flirtatious nor mirthful. Zevran’s smile faltered. “... But if you touch a hair on Annie’s head, I’ll make the Crows look merciful,” the nobleman continued, and Annie’s mouth fell open. It felt like she was floating on air. She vaguely heard Anders ask indignantly if the rest of them were fair game.</p><p>Somebody put an arm around her shoulders and gently began to steer her back to the boat. Her feet were moving of their own accord, as if she were in a dream, and Annie blinked in the low light. Leliana was by her side, reassuring her that no harm would come to pass. Anders joined her right side, patting the top of her head. Wordlessly, he handed his staff to Leliana, and turned around and pointed at his back.</p><p>“Again?” Annie asked, once she had found her voice again. “Now I’m convinced you want something from me.”</p><p>Anders clucked his tongue. “I just don’t want you to sit around in wet clothes and die of cold,” he explained, and Annie’s cheeks warmed. She supposed that the healer was right, however, and she wasn’t going to turn down his offer for pride’s sake. She leapt onto his back and he adjusted his grip, then he waded out into the water. Annie buried her nose in his neck, smiling against his clean skin, and Anders laughed.</p><p>“Sorry. Tickles,” he said.</p><p>Sten held out his hand and when Annie placed her own tiny hand in his large palm, he pulled her up with such strength that she yelped and rubbed her poor shoulder socket. She sat on the deck at the rear of the boat, slipping her cloak around her shoulders and pulling it tight against the growing wind. Wynne patted her shoulder.</p><p>As they set sail once more, Annie glanced down the deck to look at Zevran sandwiched between Aedan and Leliana, regaling them with tales of Antiva. Alistair was watching the elf warily, sharpening his sword. Annie tucked her head between her knees, pondering on asking Leliana for her scarf again, but decided against it. Morrigan settled herself next to her, whispering another incantation, and Annie sighed as her cloak warmed itself.</p><p>There were some perks to being the resident princess, Annie supposed, and she hid her smile in the collar of her tunic.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>after four years I'm back... lol. I started a story called Life on Mars when I was 16 (obviously I love David Bowie song titles) but I honestly don't know where I was going with that. In the past four years I've done my A-Levels and now I'm halfway through my degree and thought I should get back into writing, what with miss rona and all that. This is another attempt at an MGiT but better planned out this time :))</p><p>inspo sort of came from me wondering why time magic somehow isn't a huge thing considering the mission in Inquisition like it was lowkey forgotten about... until now. (but no time travel yet I'm afraid)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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